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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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GuestQM Existential depression
  • replies: 11

I feel like no one understands me, and it makes me incredibly lonely. It started when I was in school, and I thought it would get better as I grow older. I’m now approaching 30, but I’m still not seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. I tried to ... View more

I feel like no one understands me, and it makes me incredibly lonely. It started when I was in school, and I thought it would get better as I grow older. I’m now approaching 30, but I’m still not seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. I tried to understand others, to listen to their problems without judgement, and to give advice (when asked). I’ve been told that I’m a good listener and a good friend. But when I need someone to talk to, no one seems to understand. Sometimes I am misinterpreted, other times I am ignored and even criticised. It seems the more I try, the more I am misunderstood, and the more I feel frustrated. I hate going out to parties or meetup groups. Everyone seems to talk over each other, and no one listens. The more I socialise, the lonelier I feel. I tried to improve myself, to read books, to try to think more rationally, to communicate more clearly, so that others can understand me better. But after years of trying, it all seems fruitless. It’s no one’s fault, really. I have a sensitive temperament that makes me a little out of sync, a little hard for others to understand, I know that. I can’t change who I am, nor can I change other people. But this doesn’t make things better. On most days, I’m okay. I’ve adapted by spending most of my non-working time alone at home, reading books, watching movies, etc. I like stories that have some philosophical themes, e.g. existentialist writers like Sartre, Camus, Kafka, etc. Some of these may be depressing, but at least they make me feel understood, which is something that the people in my life cannot provide. I can feel myself changing over time, becoming more isolated, more cynical, more resentful, and less trustful towards other people. I know how counter-productive it is, but I don’t know how else to cope. On some bad days I feel like wanting to end all of this. I just came out of a bad depression, where I spent days in bed and even had suicidal thoughts… right now I’m feeling a little better. I’m thinking of seeing a psychologist. But where do I start? I don’t even know the name of my problems, other than ‘depression’ and ‘loneliness’. The few counsellors/therapists I’ve tried were of no help at all, and I often felt worse after speaking to them. I’m also thinking of moving to another city and start over (after the virus ends), but I’m not sure if this would help. I’d hate to waste so much effort just to end up back at the same place. I guess I’m just hoping to find people are in the same situation, or have been through something similar… what worked for you? how did things improve? Anyway, thanks for reading through all of this…

Alfio Is this really what life is?
  • replies: 3

I’m 23, and I am at war with the world. I am not speaking with my family, direct and extended - due to problems which have arisen from the loss of a family business. I am losing everything from this. Family relationships, personal assets, and now my ... View more

I’m 23, and I am at war with the world. I am not speaking with my family, direct and extended - due to problems which have arisen from the loss of a family business. I am losing everything from this. Family relationships, personal assets, and now my partner. The stress and anxiety are killing me. I am seeking counselling from my doctor and another therapist yet it doesn’t feel like it’s helping. I fight with my girlfriend because of the stress this is causing me. I want my life to be with her, yet right now I don’t even see a life for myself. The stress is killing me from the inside, the amount of days I have spent sleeping in bed, not eating. Moving. Talking or drinking is worrying me, yet I just can not see the bright side to this. With each new hopeful day, comes a new problem and new stress. I have put all my faith in God and the hope that this will all start to heal itself if I can continue to try and better myself. But I only continue to fail. I don’t know what to do, I need to find ways to talk to myself and show myself that things will be okay. But I just can’t

AnonAndy Newbie here
  • replies: 4

Firstly, I don't feel like I deserve to post here, that my troubles aren't worth talking about and I should be able to get over it. So start of feb, i quit my work (managers made me feel worthless and crap) to start uni. I had to live on campus as th... View more

Firstly, I don't feel like I deserve to post here, that my troubles aren't worth talking about and I should be able to get over it. So start of feb, i quit my work (managers made me feel worthless and crap) to start uni. I had to live on campus as the drive is ~7 hrs from home. I hadn't worried about making friends as I find myself to be pretty social, but was the complete opposite at uni. After moving in and starting uni, I barely talked to anyone and if not in class I was in my room. I felt like crap until I managed to make a friend, and we went gym together which gave me a huge boost. I was proactive with my studies, keeping up with my family, friends and my partner until uni shutdown of corona, and I had to move back home (I haven't lived home for 2 years). My house environment isn't bad, it's just I finally felt I was getting started on my life, I attempted uni before but dropped out to work for a couple years, which I don't regret but I do wish that time could of been spent towards forwarding my career. First couple days were ok, but not having regular reason to get up in the morning (gym), things started to spiral from there. I've been going to bed 1am - 3am, not keeping on top of my uni stuff, eating very little, basically have isolated myself to my room, coming out for dinner but not saying a word to my mum or her partner. I've also been pushing my partner away as well. I hate myself for pushing the people I care and love away and I just want these feelings to go away. Also doesn't help that I can't see my partner due to the new (but understandable) laws. Tonight after dinner, I was lying in my bed just feeling really down and sinking feeling in my stomach, and my parter is trying to message me. I ignore her for a while, until she gets fed up and asks why I'm not talking. Sparks a bit of an argument/conversation, which was very helpful for me to get out of bed and onto this website. I told her that I don't like talking to her about feeling like this as I feel she'll see me as a weak person, and she assured me the opposite. I feel that when I talk to people about my issues, it's a weakness to not be able to help yourself and seeking it from others. Thanks for reading the post, I just needed to clear my head and vent

Paige_T depression
  • replies: 1

Last night I cried myself to sleep hoping to feel better by morning. I woke up today and I am still trapped in the dark. I’ve already lost one family member to depression. I never wanted to be consumed by the darkness but here I am writing about it. ... View more

Last night I cried myself to sleep hoping to feel better by morning. I woke up today and I am still trapped in the dark. I’ve already lost one family member to depression. I never wanted to be consumed by the darkness but here I am writing about it. I usually write in my journal to help because I refuse to let anyone know how I’m truly feeling. I question why I am here , what is even the point.

Tired_and_over_it Venting
  • replies: 1

Hi, this is my first post and I just wanted to vent. Its probably going to be long so if you don’t feel like reading I suggest moving on now. To start, I am a 38 female and I have had mental health issues for years. My diagnosis’s have been depressio... View more

Hi, this is my first post and I just wanted to vent. Its probably going to be long so if you don’t feel like reading I suggest moving on now. To start, I am a 38 female and I have had mental health issues for years. My diagnosis’s have been depression, anxiety, bi-polar type 2, borderline personality disorder and autistic traits. I have physical conditions diagnosed such as spinal issues, arthritis, joint hyper mobility relating to a connective tissue disorder, reynaulds syndrome among others. I won’t go further into the physical conditions as this post is about mental health, however physical issues come into it so i included for clarity. I work in a government job, and since august last year my physical conditions have flared so I can only work reduced hours. Prior to this I managed my symptoms ok, and working full time. I am good at my job, going above and beyond and was rewarded with a promotion. It was after receiving this promotion that my physical symptoms flared prevented me from working full time. Instead of being an inclusive and supportive workplace they made my life hell and put me through so much to try and get me to quit or demote myself. Since this began my job has been in limbo with constant threats by my employer of losing my job. The problems at work have exacerbated my mental conditions. I have been struggling since august of last year and the issues are still continuing to this day. I have a wonderful GP, clinical psychologist and psychiatrist. Im on numerous medications to help. Then the corona virus hits, and now the country is ‘encouraged’ to stay at home and not go out. I was swimming a couple of times a week which was helping, it felt like I could forget everything when I was swimming and just had the water surrounding me, it was a form of meditation. Now I can’t go, and my physical issues prevent other forms of exercise, including walking or I end up in a lot of pain. Im now isolated (with husband and daughter), I can’t go swimming, I can’t get out and I don’t know how long this will last. I’m waiting to see if Comcare will accept my claim, my job is still in limbo and now stuck at home because of COVID-19. I just want to explode or hide from everything which I can’t because I need to move and rest equally to try limit pain. I hate being in limbo and I have to guide my daughter in her remote learning. run out of characters but I think I explained. I’m struggling with a lot and needed to get it out. Thanks for listening.

Ilsie 1st time self isolator feeling very isolated
  • replies: 3

Hi. I was experiencing a moderate level of depression and anxiety prior to making the decision to take a holiday with my eldest daughter that I hoped would be very good for my mental health. The current situation resulted in us cutting our holiday sh... View more

Hi. I was experiencing a moderate level of depression and anxiety prior to making the decision to take a holiday with my eldest daughter that I hoped would be very good for my mental health. The current situation resulted in us cutting our holiday short and making a mad scramble back to Australia. Unfortunately this meant that we have ended up in 'self isolation'. However, my daughter and I live 3 hours apart and I am really struggling with being isolated at home. I have wonderful neighbours, a beautiful partner that does not live with me and good friends. However, I have found that the past 5 days being confined to my home without being able to work or so much as walk around the block, very challenging. I have felt a very high level of depression and anxiety. This is coupled with guilt and anger because apparently the sun is shining and the birds are singing and I 'shouldn't feel this way.' Ah, if only it were that simple. I suspect that there must be others that live alone, or even with a partner, who find themselves in this situation and I thought this might be a good place to hear their stories and share my own. Depression can be such a lonely beast at the best of times. Thank you for letting me join your forum. Ilsie

kissmyaussieart I don't know what to do
  • replies: 4

Hi all, I'm sure many people have also been affected by the situation at hand, but I've found I think I've nearly hit my personal rock bottom. I'm 18, I was starting uni at my dream course this year, and was making so many friends, and I had a job th... View more

Hi all, I'm sure many people have also been affected by the situation at hand, but I've found I think I've nearly hit my personal rock bottom. I'm 18, I was starting uni at my dream course this year, and was making so many friends, and I had a job that I loved, and was working on improving my relationship with my family. I have now lost uni (I study art so obviously practical classes can't be taught online), I've lost work, my parents are causing me stress again (my mum called me "sad guts" behind my back and complained to go back to work faster), and my two best friends currently aren't talking to me. I'm constantly at the verge of tears and I'm really lost on what I can do. My phone call psychologist appointment isn't for another two weeks, and I feel like I can't reach out to anyone anymore since they're sick of my sadness. I'm trying so hard to be productive, but every day it gets harder and harder. I'm tired all the time, but struggle to sleep. I don't want to sleep at night because that's when my family is quiet. I'm struggling to eat, I just feel sick all the time. I'm at a loss on what to do, I just really need help. Currently the good things I guess are the fact I'm still slowly doing art at home, and I play animal crossing to escape reality a lot right now. I just feel like I worked so hard to improve in my anxiety and depression and now it's gone backwards and I don't know what to do. Any advice or kind words would be appreciated. Thank you.

Dockk I don’t feel good most days but I’m very sane.
  • replies: 3

Look, I’ll be clear with myself first, I don’t feel good most evenings. I’m still happy on top but I’m not in a good place. I can tell I’m deteriorating and a rate which I find very concerning. I have good friends who know about my depression and anx... View more

Look, I’ll be clear with myself first, I don’t feel good most evenings. I’m still happy on top but I’m not in a good place. I can tell I’m deteriorating and a rate which I find very concerning. I have good friends who know about my depression and anxiety but I think my problems are getting to a place that I don’t think I feel comfortable talking to them about. I don’t know. But I know one thing though is that I’m becoming more and more condescending, nervous anxious and depressed with my life. And sometimes i tend to act like I don’t know that all this is happening. I’ve never been diagnosed, so I’m not the judge of my mental state but I can tell that I’m not thinking correctly. Who knows? Uhhh anyway, am I wrong to feel how I feel about my situation

runashley hi i’m new and really would like some help
  • replies: 7

Hi I’m ash and I’m looking for some help, I’ve been having these insane crazy depressive episodes recently. I’ve had depression ever since I was young but every now and then it gets a whole lot worse and no one in my family cares. They’ve been told b... View more

Hi I’m ash and I’m looking for some help, I’ve been having these insane crazy depressive episodes recently. I’ve had depression ever since I was young but every now and then it gets a whole lot worse and no one in my family cares. They’ve been told by multiple doctors/psychologists that I have depression etc so they are aware of it they just kinda chose to forget about it. Like recently, every night I’ll be just crying for hours to the point where I literally feel so numb I can’t cry anymore, but I just get yelled and screamed at for crying over nothing, which obviously makes it so much worse as then I normally have some sought of panic attack and can’t breathe. Then they tell me I’m overreacting and that I’m immature and acting like a child. My parents who ever house I stay at (they’re divorced) both feel the same way and treat me the same. But basically the recent problem has been that I’m in my room a lot or that I’m always on my laptop, because of corona virus obviously we can’t go outside really anymore but I have been going on walks occasionally. Because how my parents treat I really dislike being with them I hate spending time with them, I hate doing anything with them because I’m constantly anxious around them, feeling like I’m walking on eggshells trying everything I can to not be screamed at. So therefore I just chill in my room listening to music, watching shows etc, as these types of activities make me forget about everything that’s going on and help to calm me. My parents are constantly on my back about doing this though and get so mad if I’m in there for too long but when they ask me to do stuff I get annoyed and frustrated and it often comes out as anger as when I’m really anxious I have such a short fuse. I know that’s probably something I have to work on but they get angry right back calling me every name under the sun and just verbally abusing me until I can’t help but to think really scary thoughts. I honestly don’t know what to do anymore the only thing that gives me some sense of security is doing these things but this causes so much tension because they don’t understand how they make me feel better. Anyway I really would love some advice on how to deal with this. I obviously have tried talking to them about this multiple times but it always ends up in a fight so that’s not really an option. I also don’t really feel comfortable bringing it up with friends at this point. Thank you for reading and I hope to hear from someone soon. ash

parker1976 First timer looking for support
  • replies: 3

Where to begin!!! 43 yrs old, married for 15yrs now divorced, 2 girls (Teenage). Had a long term relationship of nearly 5 years until recently. Always brushed off mental health (typical male attitude) until i felt it myself. My ex long term partner (... View more

Where to begin!!! 43 yrs old, married for 15yrs now divorced, 2 girls (Teenage). Had a long term relationship of nearly 5 years until recently. Always brushed off mental health (typical male attitude) until i felt it myself. My ex long term partner (lets call her 'S')was diagnosed with BPD after she had an episode (dont know if thats the right term) and pushed one of my kids. My reaction was not the best and I ended the relationship. In my up bringing i felt my parents never put me first and I know how it made me feel, i suppose that is why I reacted the way i did and ended the relationship as i didnt want my kids to feel like i had. I kept in touch with S and was so proud of her for how she treated her BPD diagnosis and the DBT training she did. I told her she turned from a girl into a women and I was so proud of her. During our relationship I was not the perfect partner and I had commitment issues which came from my marriage. I was scared to commit, live together etc which resulted in a few break ups of my doing over the relationship. Last year I suddenly lost my father who lived in the UK which obviously came as a massive shock. After returning from the UK i decided i needed some help with my mental health. Losing my father made me realise there were things in my life that i had never addressed and because of this i made some poor decisions (not committing, ending the relationship with S etc). I was still speaking with S and were sleeping together, neither of us had looked for anyone else. I made a decision to commit to her but when i told my kids they were upset and i was weak and broke it off with S again. I told S that I needed to work on my issues so that I can be a better person for me and for us. S said I needed to do it for me not us. I said ultimately im doing it for the both of us because i love you and she said she loved me. I had been trying to contact S but she snapped back at me in a msg to leave her alone. I went to see her a few days later and she seemed off. I asked her where she'd been and she told me with a friend, i didn't believe her and asked if she'd been on a date? she said yes, I asked if she slept with him? she said Yes. I was/am devastated, she has now completely cu me out of her life, blocked me on everything and i am struggling. I think of her all day everyday. I know she has moved on with someone else and its killing me. How is she able to move on so quickly when she said she loved me. I cant stop beating myself up.