Lost in Life

[Ollie2026]

Hello......first time I've posted on here before. Will see how this goes....

Not really sure where to begin.....ive been suffering with my mental health most of my life. Have only spoken up about it in the last year as i had sort of a mental breakdown i guess you could call it. Have been seeing a counsellor for close to a year now who i have found helpful and i had improved from where i was last year.

But just feel like im heading back down that rabbit hole lately and i really dont know why. My life is good. Have a good job, a very loving a supportive partner who im building a life with but i still get those feelings of not wanting to be here anymore and just lost with life.

I feel very selfish as i read some of the other posts on here from people who are really doing it tough, when i really shouldn't be complaining about my life.

I have a counselling appointment tomorrow so will be sure to speak to them about how ive been feeling of late. Just thought id try something new and share with you all.

Thanks for reading 

[white knight]

Hi, welcome

I hope your counselling appointment went well.

I dont really have all the answers, I've been where you are at and know the loss in your soul that seems to last forever. For me the answer was to simultaneously dig deep to find myself and also seek the true meaning of life.

So to help you and all others reading those post, let me express that your life, you as a person, a wonderful human being, only needs the sniff of faith in yourself to come good, the slight hint of the value of life itself to appreciate the wonder of your existence... and your inner heart. And you can proceed together with your partner.

Couple all that together along with some basic changes in your life like job, career, living location and relationships and you'll be on your way to paradise where I am now. 

I recall in 1996 a week before my marriage dissolved, my attempt on my life. Then 24 years later when my daughter married I realised my value as a dad and now a new granddad. And regardless of motivation or good things in our lives we can fall at any time into a void of dark and cold perception. But it isnt real, we have to actively say to ourselves "this will pass, I'll be ok, now what changes can I make to help my recovery transpire"? 

WE ALL CRAVE

I pray but I'm not a believer

I hope even when there isnt any

I appreciate but dont feel fun

I try but the results dont come 

I see a bird and watch it fly

I watch people, laughing walking by

I crave for no clouds and no running tears

Maybe I'm happiest facing my fears

But the sun will rise like every other day

And I hope you'll find your way

Because there's wonder when a bird flies

We all crave an Ollie in our lives

TonyWK

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-PUvPX8qz38 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cgh08mZ355Q

TonyWK