Looking for hope

EmiJ

33y F

I live in a constant cycle of needing a new living environment. However my current environment affects my mental state which affects my physical state which has affected every job I have had.

Nearly 4 years ago I completed a certificate in individual support and got my first job in age care as a carer. I thought that was the beginning of something for me but the cycle caught up to me and I failed completely and still have not been able to hold a job.
Has anyone actually been able to break the cycle? Get their own place? Stop the job hopping? And all in their 30s?

randomxx

Hiya op , and so sorry to hear of things . Can't offer any advice really but just a few things relating l guess.

1st up yeah, l job hopped for yrs back in 20s early 30s, l'd always wanted to be my own boss own hrs do things my way , just do my thing yaknow, l never fitted the norm. Well l started my own business and although hard at times it was my thing my way my rules, and all went well from there, l'd found myself as far as work goes. No one would've thought it for me, it seemed on the outside as if l just wouldn't work but l worked my guts out in my business, things just had to be right for me. Not that that's for everyone l know but just saying that for sure, one day, the right thing, when things align you'll settle into something, try not to worry, you will.

Good news is my ex was in aged care, she's worked for a lot of different places and often had runs like yours but yet she was one of the best workers. At any rate, she's 50s now and has just been changing places again , 3 in 18mths, mainly due to moving and so working in new places she didn't like buttttt- good news is there's always such demand, you can do that in your business to find your thing, don't think it's just you.

Anyway , chin up, right place and you'll be fine.

rx

EmiJ

I have often thought of starting my own business as a potential alternative one day. Your reply has definitely given me another perspective on certain things

thanks for being so nice

therising

Hi EmiJ

While some folk may say 'That person refuses to hold a steady job. They're always going from one job to the next', I much prefer so see such a person as having a Goldilocks ability. In that story, there's the ability to feel the bed as too hard or too soft or just right. There's the ability to sense the porridge as being too hot or too cold or just right. You could kind of look at the job or career search in the same way. Too much office politics or too little structure and lack of management support or just right. Too much stress or not enough stimulation or just right. So on and so on. Goldilocks didn't waste time trying to get used to cold porridge or a hard mattress, she just got on with things.

I suppose what a lot of the search comes down to is 1)the search for the job that's just right and 2)a search for personal development skills and abilities. You could say 'No matter what, I'd never come to love or enjoy this job because...' OR 'I'd really come to love or enjoy this job if only I had the skills or the ability to manage this side of it...'. Personally, I wouldn't waste too much time in a job I could never enjoy, no matter what. It'd just feel like a form of torture. If I dreaded going to work every day, technically that would make it a dreadful job.

Being a 56yo gal, back in my 20s I worked as a personal carer in an aged care facility before leaving the industry after a handful of years. When I returned to working in aged care about 10 years ago, I got my foot in the door by taking on a role in the kitchen. The idea was to gain a certificate so as work in a PCA position. It never happened. While back in the old days😁 the work was much easier, over time the amount of paperwork, the level of stress/pressure and a host of other things led me to change my mind. What used to be a fairly easy and enjoyable job has turned into something very different. While it would still have been enjoyable, serving others while developing great relationships, 'easy' is far from how I'd describe a PCA role these days.

I think while there are some people who can simply just do a job, there are others who feel what they do. For all the feelers out there, there's nothing wrong with trying to get a feel for the right job while also gain a feel or a sense of what's not right for us. While a job may not be our cup of tea or bowl of porridge😊, we shouldn't be too hard on ourself as long as we're searching for the job we'll love.