I don’t really know what category to put this in but I don’t really discuss my feelings and I have been hesitant to do it on here but I want to try. This year has definitely been a year of discovery and acceptance which has been a good and bad thing. I have realised I probablyyy need therapy but I also feel like I’m being dramatic. I have been invalidating my feeling because I can’t tell if what I’m feeling is even real. I don’t even know where to start but right now I’m just not happy with my lifestyle but I can’t get myself to actually make change because I’m in a way comfortable where I am. I have basically just been isolating myself in my room and just filling my days with distractions but I want to be productive and I feel guilty. These distractions are making me happy short-term but it’s unhealthy. In my teenage years I kind of put up a front of happiness but now I don’t even try is the thing, and it has just gotten worse. I think an issue might be loneliness because I’m an only child and it’s been hard for me to connect with people. Overthinking is another thing that just doesn’t help because I can’t do anything normally because of it, which might be linked to anxiety, I’m not sure. As a first year uni student It also sucks seeing other people my age doing stuff with their life which adds to the guilt. It just sucks because I want to do better but I don’t have self control or discipline. Anyway that was just some base level context.
