Hello BBFFC
Welcome to the forum and thank you raising this topic. It is a normal reaction.
When we are depressed the energy in our body tends to get flat and we feel tired and without motivation. No desire to engage in activities that we once enjoyed and we feel generally miserable. Meeting with friends is an interactive situation where we feel obliged to join in the group talk and anything the group is doing. It's almost as if we can borrow the energy from our friends to brighten up. This stimulates us to produce our own energy and we then have an enjoyable time. It's fantastic and we want to stay in that place where we are happy and know we are cared for.
Unfortunately once the group has dispersed our energy also goes. It takes energy to generate more energy but without the chat and catching up with what everyone is doing the motor cannot work. All those lovely interactions make us feel good and very much alive.Once you are on your own again it feels as if someone has switched off the petrol and we are back to feeling miserable.
Are you reasonably fit? During my depression I exercised as little as possible. I could not be bothered. Consequentially when I needed to walk somewhere it was the biggest task. I think your 'I hit the wall again, every single time' comes, to some extent, because you are not fit. (Please excuse me if I am wrong) There is a different energy in the body when we are happy and engaging with others, or simply doing something we enjoy.
Once you have left your friends the motivation goes also. In some ways it can feel worse as we are also physically tired. It takes stamina to be part of that group so without reserves we feel deflated. And of course there is the disappointment of the group splitting up again.
It's usual when saying goodbye to friends after a night out to feel a little sad anyway. We all enjoy our socialising and miss it when we go home. Depression heightens the disappointment and leaves us feeling flat. It has a lot to answer for.
Walking or other exercise keeps us in better shape which does have a flow on effect to our mental health. May be the message is to keep up our fitness which in turn helps to improve our resilience.
Mary
