I need help

[vierared]

I've been letting my moods and attitude effect everything around me, my relationships, friendships and work.

A couple of months ago i got out of a relationship with someone. It was a depressing relationship for both of us but i feel as though my bad attitude ruined it. I was always angry or sad, lazy and just didn't care in the end.
I went through a lot of crap when i was little with my mum (shes an alcoholic), i think that may be the reason i get so mad? i'm not really sure.
The most recent thing that i have screwed up because of my attitude is work, I've taken today off (another day) so i guess i'll be talking to the big boss tomorrow/soon, ever since my last relationship ended I've really hit rock bottom ...  

I'm scared of screwing up a new relationship i have with someone that i really want to be with, fortunately they understand somewhat and wish to continue talking with me. We had intended to spend Christmas together this year but i'm not sure if that is going to happen because of my moods. I'm also worried if i do go to see them for Christmas i'll ruin everything.

I need help controlling my anger and my depression.

[Mbuna]

Veirared

The topic of your post says it all. This website is fantastic. It has all sorts of help resources as well as a list of professionals who can help you out. I made the decision some time back that i was not going to let myself live life as a miserable so & so.  I must admit its not easy. Anger and bad attitude can be a self defense mechanism and its a habit that can be hard to break. Another symptom of depression is that we tend to put off making decisions. Don't put this one off. Go and speak to someone. Trust me when I say " You will be glad that you did"

[geoff]

dear Vierared, maybe it should be ' my relationships, friendships and work.' are affecting your moods and your attitude.

I would ask your boss for some time off work, rather than him/her dismissing you, however if this bad attitude has been going on for awhile, maybe because of your mum, then 2 weeks isn't really going to help you overcome it, but it will set a path for you to continue with some counselling.

I think that within some of us we also have some anger problems, because always ask 'why me', 'it's not fair that I get these feelings from depression', but also struggling with an alcoholic mum who was always trying to find money to purchase her alcohol, or maybe taking it from you, isn't a good base for you to grow up with.

If you want to be with this person, just as they do for xmas, it maybe a good time to to participate with them, and if for any reason you feel as though you are going to crack then just quitely leave. Geoff.