A warm welcome,
I seriously dont know how you manage all that. We've looked after my MIL in 2021 for 8 months before she passed and we weren't working, retired.
Ok, your depression. I have bipolar obviously with its depression/manic swings contained a lot with meds. I've taken the view that meds are lifelong and some of us are guilty of wanting to and successfully going off meds or reducing them only to find we are worse off. So, strictly speaking- GP advice only on meds. Very improtant.
Here are the changes you have the power to implement-
- Workplace. Begin actively looking for a job that has a better management
- Career. For some a break away from their qualified profession results in a working holiday
- Environment (location). Are you happy living where you do?
- Workload. Can you slice a portion of time from caring for your mum and give that to a sibling? I had an auntie that had 3 sisters and they shuffled her between all of them one week on 3 weeks off. It worked well. If not can they do the shopping? Or order your groceries on-line and just reverse in and they staff can load them
- Hobbies, sports and interests. Even knitting, jigsaws, bingo, social gatherings.
- Sleep quality. Some people are unaware of a sleep disorder which I had... moderate sleep apnea so for 17 years I've used a cpap. See your GP for a sleep study if you stop breathing during sleep, or snore. Sleep quality is largely ignored and can make a huge difference.
Diet and exercise. I'm with you on this, I'm overweight, always have been even when I joined the Airforce at 17yo. I have a picture of myself at 2yo with a big belly. One doctor once asked me if I'd always have my belly and told him about that picture and he laughed "I dont think you're going to ever lose it". So my mentality is simple- I try to make healthy eating choices with most meals but I know it isnt sustainable and enjoy my pizza, fish and chips or even a chocolate with coffee in the evening. You cant torture yourself.
Some of the responses to a bad manager-
I have only one other speed and that's slower
You know well enough by now that I'm reasonable, all I can do is hope others are also
I cant do more than one job at a time, can you prioritise them for me?
I'm not in this world to live up to unreasonable expectations but my best should be good enough dont you think?
Are you ok, you dont seem well, Do you want a chat?
Notice how some of those are questions? It makes them answer to their own attitude. This moderate questioning can make them reflect upon their approach and hopefully they back off a little. Remaining a soft touch, a person they can bully is not in your interests. They'll continue.
The other thing with managers is most abrasive ones are using a mask, it's not the person you see. They have emotions and life difficulties too so if you can take opportunities when they arise to show empathy it will be remembered by them. This can change the dynamics.
"We all love mythical characters... but we cant expect ourselves to be super people. Unlike them we're breakable" TonyWK
I hope that helps. Reply anytime
TonyWK
