I have no motivation or passion to do anything and it makes me sad.

[Pureison]

Hi.

I'm in my mid 20s and I feel like I have no energy or motivation to do anything. Everytime I think of doing something I'm always just end up not doing it. Even the things I enjoy doing, like Art and Baking, all I want to do lately is play games and play my cats. I see my friends getting married, having boyfriends, having kids and having a successful and fun jobs and friendships within their jobs,and here I am not doing any of those and I feel sad and kind of isolated. I spend my days with my parents a lot, and I try to make plans with friends but my friends are always busy with work. I want to get a job, but I have no experience, or confidence. I've even tried doing uni courses but I don't see anything that makes me passionate or any courses that I really really want to do. I want a change and I want to be like my friends, but I don't know how if there's nothing out there that I find really exciting or passionate? I'm trying my best to keep busy like focus on decorating my room and talking to my parents about general life. And even if I do find a course I really like, I'm always thinking that I'm not smart enough to do it and my brain can't handle it, because I have a mental disability. I've tried doing art courses which seem to work but lately as I said, I just feel unmotivated and have no inspiration or anything to do it. I am thinking of doing photography and modelling as a hobby for instagram and maybe doing a steps course or something but I'm worried my brain can't handle it, and I'm going to stress out and drop out of it, like other courses I have done.

Does anyone else feel like this? How do you cope with it?

[Riseabovethedark]

Hi Pureison,

I too am in my mid 20’d and lately have been feeling a lack of motivation. I’ve also noticed that I haven’t taken part in any of my hobbies in a long time. I don’t even know that I can call them my hobbies anymore. I’m not really sure why I feel that way, or how to fix it so i’m pro not much help there, but know that you’re not alone in feeling that way.

Picking up photography or modelling could be a great way to find a new hobby. Try not to pressure yourself before you start though. Nobody starts anything as a pro. You have to work your way up to it, but i’m sure you’ll be fine.

It’s so hard to not compare your life to other peoples, especially when your friends start getting married and having kids and don’t seem to be as available to you anymore. But you have to remember that you’re not failing just because others are succeeding.

Something i’ve noticed is that your mindset can be a huge influence on what you can achieve. A negitive mindset can hold you back. I know it holds me back when I let it. But I also know how hard it is to force yourself to be positive and believe in your own abilities when it doesn’t come naturally. I find that it helps me, if once a week I write down two things that I am good at and one thing I’d like to improve. It can be anything like, “I am a kind person”, or “I am a good speller”. Anything. You can reuse the same things too. It forces me to acknowledge that i’m not dumb and I can do things, and it gives me something to work towards. It’s not a fix but it helps.

I hope that helps some. 🙂

-Riseabovethedark

[Pureison]

Wow thank you so much for your response Riseabovethedark, I've never thought it like that. I thought I was the only one struggling with this, so it's nice to know I'm not alone.

I'll work on those techniques, and hopefully that'll help with whatever this is I'm feeling. Lately I just feel so stuck and confused on what I want to do with my life and I always end up changing every single time, like I struggle with making a concrete decision or specific direction of where I want to go, so this is really reassuring me. I really appreciate it, I also hope that you find something that you're passionate about as well, best of luck to you.

[Riseabovethedark]

You’re definitely not alone and it feels good to chat to someone who knows how i’m feeling too. People tend to be pretty good at hiding what is going on in their head or in their lives, but it’s good to talk to someone about it.

I totally get feeling stuck and not being able to make a concrete decision, especially in regards to career pathways. I’m the most indecisive person I know and changed my course after the first year, but that’s okay. I did what felt right for me. When I can’t make a decision I also find it helpful to write a pros vs cons list. Good luck! And thanks for the well wishes! 😊

[Billyc]

Hi,

hope I can make a valued contribution, so here goes.

this may sound cliched but you have youth on your side! Nothing wrong with where your at, I’m 40 + now with 20 years experience under a tertiary education, and am exploring new avenues to re invent because of a rut I recently experienced, I am seeking to re- ignite a sense of purpose in life.

ever thought of exploring a university course? Rumour has it universities prefer mature age students to fresh out of school as statistics suggest they are less likely to drop out.. I don’t know if it’s true or not but it sounds logical... TAFE degrees also

you May temporarily have a reduced income for a while but in the bigger picture of your journey, by the time your 40 like me, it may seem a worthwhile short term sacrifice

just a thought

best

[Sky31]

I’m also in my mid-20’s, but, I’ve had a very different type of life to you thus far, however, I’m able to connect and understand those feelings you feel.

The first thing you need is a goal. What is it you want to achieve or experience in life? Sometimes, you need to see or experience something that triggers a desire to achieve a goal. For example someone may see a wonderful YouTube video of a boy’s reaction to being adopted by his foster family.

This wonderful video shows how special this moment was for this boy, knowing that finally he has a family, a forever family! Something like this could set off a goal for a person to think “Wow, I want to changes children’s lives, I want to be that special person”. You may have a goal to change the lives of 5 or more foster children throughout your life (that’s my goal 😉 )

Someone else might have a goal of what I call “apartment climbing”. The idea is that you start off saving a deposit for the cheapest apartment you can buy, let’s say somewhere cheap in a small city such as Burnie or Devonport in Tasmania on the ground floor (you can get places under 100K). Then, you move in and try to save for a property up higher, let’s say floor 6 in Darwin. Then continue the cycle, Floor 15 in Adelaide, Floor 28 in Perth, Floor 47 in Surfers paradise, Floor 100 penthouse in Australia 108, Melbourne. Your earlier properties can become investment properties that help fund your retirement while you go on adventures from city to city and climb your way into the sky. More skyscrapers are being built all the time, so the floor number is endless, plus the floor number you reach is a solid number you can use as a form of progress.

Those are two goals that you could potentially go for, but choose your own goal that speaks to you. I purposely went for two extremely different examples to show how your goal could be literally anything, but a goal is a very important step in getting away from the uncertainty of where to go in life.

Also, you don’t have to get married just because others are. I myself am asexual and aromantic so I’ll never get married, but I really want to improve childrens lives, that I’m passionate about.

Remember that you don’t always need a “course” to get started in life. All you need is goal, and a passion to work towards it.

Good Luck!

[Pureison]

Hi thanks Billyc for your contribution, but as I said in my original post I haven’t exactly found a University course I feel greatly passionate about yet. I’m also afraid that I can’t handle some of the higher education because of my disability. But that’s really exciting news for you and i admire you for studying at that age. It’s impressive because not many people do it.

thank you Riseabovethedark it’s nice to know that I’m not the only one struggling with decision making. I’ll try and work on the pro and cons list.

[Pureison]

Wow, this is a really great perpective and a wake up call Sky. Thank you for this as it has opened my eyes a bit more. I just need to figure out what “speaks to me.” That’ll be the hard part.

as for the married thing, I guess I just felt a bit lonely and seeing everyone being all excited over their wedding or new partners just made me feel sad because I’m all by myself. But thank you for the reassurance.