I hate the way I feel, and half the time I don't know why I'm feeling this way

[Bee1998]

I constantly feel frustrated inside, like I'm missing something and i don't know what it is. I have overwhelming feelings rush through me most days, which include agitation, anger, frustration, sadness, emptiness, loneliness, confusion, worry..... It's hard to explain, but even now as I'm typing this, I feel like weird rush of frustration through my body. It's almost as if I need to punch a wall, have sex, do drugs, or all of the above at the same time. It sounds silly, but that's the best way of describing it. It's like i'm never satisfied with life, and nothing interests me or excites me anymore. I'm constantly bored and wanting to go and do things, but am unable to due to my lack of friends. Today I got so bored that I resorted to drinking alcohol. Even just thinking of things I could do frustrated me, or just didn't interest me. I would have liked to have gone to the beach with a friend or something, but I don't have anyone to ask. Even if I did that though, it would just be to pass time... I still would feel empty. I just want to scream and cry and kick and punch. I don't know what is wrong with me.

[Sophie_M]

Hey Bee1998,
Thanks for reaching out this afternoon, We're sorry to hear you are struggling today, it sounds as though you have a lot on your mind. We know how restless the physical feelings of depression and anxiety can make us and are sorry you're having to manage this. We would urge that you get in touch with our Support Service. We’re available 24/7 by phone on 1300 22 4636 or on Webchat 1pm-12am AEDT on our website; One of our professional mental health counsellors at our Support Service will give you support and point you in the right direction for help in your area.

[white knight]

Hi again,

Humans can be unfulfilled with life. I guess that's why religion has such a big following, to seek the ultimate in security. Though an atheist myself I had to find some form of spirituality. It's subjective however, everyone is so different that one solution wont help the other.

It would be good to see you help yourself in a practical sense rather than allow yourself to be led by your frustrations towards things like alcohol. So what is it in me that feel fulfilled? that could help you to even give you hints as to where your own fulfilment lies?

A friend once said to me when I was young "Tony the day you watch a bee collect nectar or a flower bloom from start to finish...then you are living life". She meant of course - appreciating life. A guru I follow called Maharaji has teachings on Youtube about these very topics, is a major international teacher and I've followed him now for 32 years. I'll leave links below.

I would also seek out a visit to your GP and/or ring the support service Sophie has mentioned.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BhrtbBrMQ1Y

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cgh08mZ355Q

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X30sWycWz4o

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mzM1tVcf1XY

Having any mental illness can impair your positivity. Just because I found my spirit doesnt immune me from depression and feeling down. So it isnt the be all and end all.

I hope it helps. Reply anytime

TonyWK