i feel alone

[Zombie_s3r3nity]

Everybody thinks I'm lazy and useless I hate myself. I hate that I can't do the simple task of going to school for a full week. everyone just doesn't get me they would only care if I was dead. I'm really struggling but no one seems to actually care I'm only 14 and I know I shouldn't be feeling this way, but I don't know what to do. Every time I'm slightly upset people say ' I'm not allowed to be upset because everyone else in the world has bigger problems than me' they say I can talk to them, but they don't actually care they are just going to keep living their lives regardless of what I say they don't actually care no one does and I'm so tired. I just want someone who gets me someone who I can talk to that would actually care. I don't want to feel alone anymore.

[therising]

Hi Zombie_s3r3nity

My heart goes out to so much. It's such a horrible thing when no one seems to be feeling with us or for us in the ways we really need them to. When no one's feeling with us or for us, technically we're the only one feeling and that equals 'feeling alone'.

My favourite people in this world are 'sensitives' or 'feelers'. These are the kinds of people who can sense/feel our upset, sense/feel the way forward for us and sense/feel exactly what we need, amongst other things. When there's a sensitive around, you know you're not going to be doing all the feeling on your own. 

Personally, I'm not a fan of dismissive remarks like 'You shouldn't be upset, as there are others with bigger problems than you'. You can sense/feel the dismissiveness. I'm not a fan of degrading remarks, such as 'You're too sensitive, you need to toughen up'. Btw, in response to that one I'd say 'Hell yeah, I'm sensitive. How else do you think I can sense a degrading remark when I feel it'😁. Also not a fan of 'You just need to get on with things'. Personally, I can't sense or feel any constructive plan in that for moving forward. 

To put a whole different spin on things, often there's nothing wrong with how someone feels or how they sense things. The biggest problem can involve them being the only one who has that ability. Whether they're called 'the black sheep of the family' or 'the odd one out', the truth can come down to them being the one who has an ability that no one else in the family has to that same degree. Also a problem is when that person is led to suppress that ability, as opposed to being led to master it in ways that are incredible.

What are you sensing or feeling that's leading you to not want to go to school? I imagine there's a perfectly good reason.🙂

[Psychdiaries2]

Hi there,

A warm welcome to the forums, I'm sure you'll get many perspectives on here.

Going to school everyday when you're struggling internally with so much heaviness is not an easy thing to do. I understand why it's been hard to go to school for you. Sometimes when we hear these insensitive comments people make about our emotions, it can make us feel so alone. But I promise you, you aren't alone. There are so many people out there going through the same thing. You are allowed to feel your emotions and express them, it doesn't mean you need to 'toughen up'. Your feelings are just as valid as everyone else's and so are your struggles. Do you wish to provide a bit more info as to why you're not going to school?

If you would like to speak to someone one-on-one, I would recommend KidsHelpline which are a really great service for young people- 1800 55 1800 or the webchat https://kidshelpline.com.au/get-help/webchat-counselling 

Please know that we care for you and hear what you're going through. You are more than welcome to reply anytime you'd like. 

Hope things get a little easier today,

PsychDiaries

[Sophie_M]

Hi Zombie_s3r3nity, 

Thank you for sharing your story with us  It sounds like you’ve been going through a really tough time and feeling quite alone. We’re really glad you reached out here. 

We hear that you’ve been feeling unheard and like no one cares - that can be incredibly hard. Please know there are supports available that genuinely want to listen and help: 

• Kids Helpline (ages 5–25): www.kidshelp.com.au or over the phone on1800 55 1800 
• Headspace (ages 12–25): https://headspace.org.au; or over the phone 3pm–10pm: 1800 650 890 
• Lifeline (24/7 crisis support): 13 11 14 or online: https://www.lifeline.org.au/ 
• Beyond Blue: 24/7 support over the phone on1300 22 4636 or via webchat: https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/ 

If you’re in immediate danger, please call 000. 

It takes real strength to reach out and share what you're going through - we’re really glad you did. We hope you’ll feel some support from our lovely community here as well. 

You're welcome back here any time  💙

Kind regards
Sophie M

[Zombie_s3r3nity]

I just can't get out of bed and motivate myself to go to school it's so hard I don't know why exactly but it just is

[therising]

Hi Zombie_s3r3nity

While it may be hard for you to know exactly what you're feeling or sensing the side effects of, there's no denying you're experiencing them. It always pays to wonder.

Could there be an energy zapping and depressing level of vitamin or mineral deficiency, relating to Vitamin D or B12 or iron for example? Could there be a hormonal factor in play or a thyroid factor? Could there be sleep related issues, such as sleep apnea, irregular sleeping patterns, a stimulant factor in play that makes it hard to sleep at night etc? Could there be a serious dopamine deficiency or a lack of dopamine uptake happening, like there is for some of those who struggle with ADHD? All these things can come with some seriously energy zapping and depressing side effects. Sometimes it pays to wonder whether there's one or more physical factors in play that we're actually feeling. So, it's not in our imagination and we're not lazy, we're actually feeling something going on. Of course the question remains 'What is it?'.

I've found the best GPs are brilliant medical detectives. They'll open their mind and wonder, they'll look for clues (symptoms), they'll consider the usual suspects and go about ticking them off the list often through blood tests. When what they suspect doesn't pan out, they'll then consider what specialists might be able to pinpoint the more unusual suspects. A specialist, such as a psychiatrist, might consider the more unusual suspects like ADHD, a depressing dopamine or serotonin deficiency or something else. A not so good GP may often jump to the wrong conclusion such as 'It's normal for kids your age to feel like this'. NO, IT'S NOT! It's not 'normal' for anyone to feel a depressing lack of energy. Again, a depressing lack of energy is a side effect of something.

Always pays to consider picking the parent who tends to wonder the most, as opposed to the one with a closed mind. If it's your mum or your dad who can't help but wonder about things, ask them to help you work out why you're struggling so much. Being a parent myself (a mum), sometimes we have to be seriously led to wonder before our sense of wonder becomes so great it just pushes us to have to know. Also pays to trigger the imagination, 'Mum/Dad, I can't help but wonder whether the reason for why I'm struggling could be reveled in a blood test. Imagine if it was'. Maybe you've got an auntie or uncle who prefers to wonder and imagine. One of the things I've learned in this world is...closed minded people get you nowhere😊