Depression

Depression affects people in Australia every day. Share your own story and learn about other member’s experiences with depression.

FAQ

Find answers to some of the more frequently asked questions on the Forums.

Forums guidelines

Our guidelines keep the Forums a safe place for people to share and learn information.

Pinned discussions

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 8

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

Chris_B Are you looking to support someone else with depression? PLEASE READ before posting
  • replies: 0

This forum is for people seeking support for their own mental health issues. If you're posting on behalf of someone else with a mental health issue that you're concerned about, please have a look at this section of our forums: Supporting family and f... View more

This forum is for people seeking support for their own mental health issues. If you're posting on behalf of someone else with a mental health issue that you're concerned about, please have a look at this section of our forums: Supporting family and friends with a mental health condition It's full of threads from people who have family members and friends going through anxiety, depression or other related conditions. Have a read through the threads there, and feel free to take part in the discussions. Below are also some helpful beyondblue resources you might want to look through first as well: Supporting someone Have the conversation

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

All discussions

teamwork Husband left home, suspect it’s depression
  • replies: 5

Hi all, I have spent the last few months reading various threads and have got so much information and feel a bit more relieved to know that I am not alone in this.. thanks to the supportive people in advance. Here’s my reason for being here. My husba... View more

Hi all, I have spent the last few months reading various threads and have got so much information and feel a bit more relieved to know that I am not alone in this.. thanks to the supportive people in advance. Here’s my reason for being here. My husband of 14 years has left home 4 months ago saying he has no feelings for me anymore. Prior to this I noticed him slowly withdrawing from social gatherings, staying at work late, always saying he is tired, and spending a lot of time on his own. His alcohol intake has increased as well. I have encouraged him to see his GP to express his feelings. He does not want help because he is in complete denial that there’s anything wrong with him. I just don’t understand how someone so loving, caring can suddenly lose feelings for me and say he doesn’t love me. He has moved out of home to his parents home. we have 3 kids who miss him very much. I am trying my best to hold the fort but I’m struggling to come to terms with this change. mum starting to wonder if it is really the depression that is making him feel this way or is it just that he has genuinely fallen out of love with me? I have asked him about his lack of feelings, specifically 'Does he feel like he’s lost his ability to love? Does it feel like he can't love me, that he can't love himself and he can't love life?' And he’s said yes to all three questions. But still denies that he doesn’t have a mental health issue. I am losing all hope. The more questions I ask I feel like I was a failure as a wife. I often ask myself why am I not good enough or worthy enough for someone to fight for me? I know deep down that none of this is on me, but most of my thoughts sway to feeling hopeless and unworthy. I want to help my husband so much but he completely shuts me out. Any conversation I have with him ends with him partly blaming me for the breakdown of our relationship. Should I hold on to hope that things will turn around? Will the stubbornness ever break so he can see he needs to focus on his mental health.

dead_cactus Anger issues caused by dwindling self-esteem?
  • replies: 2

Growing up I am often criticized whenever I do not achieve the best. My parents were raised in a culture of humility and they are practically the epitome of such. A habit has been to diminish me so much while listening to other people exaggerate thei... View more

Growing up I am often criticized whenever I do not achieve the best. My parents were raised in a culture of humility and they are practically the epitome of such. A habit has been to diminish me so much while listening to other people exaggerate their talents. As a teen I got into frequent internal conflicts because I had believed that they only wanted to please their friends and make them feel more important than they are by bringing themselves and me down. It was a tormenting process for me to get used to because to me my parents' opinions worth more than anyone else's. My motivation died because I felt indescribably insecure and their doubts towards me gradually turned into me doubting myself. Since the beginning of 2022 I often lash out on people for questioning what I say, I hate disagreements, I hate people rejecting my opinions and I made myself narcissistic and brutal. It is needed for me to reassure myself all the time by doing better and better and better until I forget why I'm even doing things at all. But after achieving something I feel so out of everything because my life has no excitement, no socialization, no pets. I'm so young but my life's nothing other than the split second of adrenaline rush before reaching a temporary goal. I can't even give myself a meaning. This is probably my longest rant ever.

SLSTR computer gambling game
  • replies: 2

I need some assistance with something that is bothering me. My dad sits up most nights after dinner and ignores the family and plays a computer gambling casino game for hours. This happens most nights, recently he has been very angry again and I thin... View more

I need some assistance with something that is bothering me. My dad sits up most nights after dinner and ignores the family and plays a computer gambling casino game for hours. This happens most nights, recently he has been very angry again and I think he is depressed with his life situation he told me today he did not want to see other members of our family because he is "sick of hearing about their holidays and good things they are doing". I feel like he avoiding the family or maybe he is just winding down each night but I feel its not healthy.. what should I do hes 74, it may seem fun and harmless but i feel it could be a behavioral addiction.

Coco18-8 Bad again
  • replies: 4

Hi, I’ve gone through depressive episodes before but this one has been going on for nearly two months and it feels different. It’s heavier, everyday I get home and cry, I am not happy with my life, I cannot tell this to my parents, I have a psycholog... View more

Hi, I’ve gone through depressive episodes before but this one has been going on for nearly two months and it feels different. It’s heavier, everyday I get home and cry, I am not happy with my life, I cannot tell this to my parents, I have a psychologist but can’t see them till September. I’ve tried talking to a friend but it doesn’t make me feel better like it has previously. Plus I’m in year 12 and about to do the hsc, I am lost, sad and don’t know what to do. Each week seems harder to get through

Cookiebelle Another Job Bites the Dust :(
  • replies: 1

Back in 2018 I had a severe shoulder injury at work and had to go on workcover. That was a very horrible time as they (WC) do all they can to 'rehabilitate" one and get one back to any kind of occupation. I was bullied and traumatised and I ended up ... View more

Back in 2018 I had a severe shoulder injury at work and had to go on workcover. That was a very horrible time as they (WC) do all they can to 'rehabilitate" one and get one back to any kind of occupation. I was bullied and traumatised and I ended up having surgery. The surgery was terrible and I suffered enormously. Meanwhile the other shoulder was injured through over use. Since then I have tried to get back into the workforce numerous times. Because of my injuries I simply cannot do any work at all that involves using my arms! Which is pretty much everything! I just resigned from my new job as the work exacerbated my injuries and I am now in constant pain and wondering what I can do next. I am so upset and over this. I know certain people (family) think I am exaggerating. I have gone over and beyond to try to find a job that doesn't cause issues but there are none. I feel I am totally useless and will be claiming TPD next week for a paltry sum. I have no choice. I know that will make certain people think badly of me again. They are not living with this. The constant pain and agony...having to be mindful of every da.. thing I do...the sleepless nights and overuse of pain killers...I feel my life is finished to be honest. All I wish for is to receive the lousy TPD and just be able to live a calm and peaceful life. I am in my late fifties and I have always felt I won't live very long. I would just like my last years to be stress free. Other than my beloved pet and son (adult) I have no life. I do not like people very much as I have been used and abused by so many. I just want a quiet existence. Is that too much to ask? I find everything nowadays to be just rubbish and horrible anyway. People have become ridiculous with their social media and there seems very few who are legitimately decent humans. I think the World has gone to sh... anyway so really have no desire to be here other than to be here for my two beloveds.

Katyonthehamsterwheel Victim mentality - label. Thoughts?
  • replies: 7

I’ve struggled for over a decade with depression and anxiety, and am admittedly not coping well at the moment. I had someone tell me that I have a victim mentality, which I found pretty upsetting. I imagine the person who said it would find that to s... View more

I’ve struggled for over a decade with depression and anxiety, and am admittedly not coping well at the moment. I had someone tell me that I have a victim mentality, which I found pretty upsetting. I imagine the person who said it would find that to simply reinforce the notion. The fact is, I do feel hopeless and negative, I whinge, I feel it’s unfair etc, which fits the victim narrative (if we want to use labels), but I also read, strategise, use tools, help-seek etc, which don’t fit. I guess I feel it’s an unfair and unhelpful label. I’m not sure it’s possible to be upbeat and sustain effort continuously. And I also don’t think I’m not “better” because I’m not trying hard enough. Thoughts?

Cookiebelle I Truly Feel My Life is Over
  • replies: 6

Hi AllI have posted recently regarding my son turning 18. I feel so responsible still. He is not very mature and is yet to get his licence. He has been hanging out with 'friends' who smoke weed. He does have a part time job which I secured for him. P... View more

Hi AllI have posted recently regarding my son turning 18. I feel so responsible still. He is not very mature and is yet to get his licence. He has been hanging out with 'friends' who smoke weed. He does have a part time job which I secured for him. Plus he is doing online Bachelor degree. I feel like a doormat. He is pulling and pushing me every which way. He wants to be responsible but then proves he can't be. He claims now he is 18 he can do what he likes! Not under my roof and at my expense!He has nothing much to do with my ex (his father) and again...I have had 18 years of constant responsibility with no help and I am in my late fifties..I really cannot cope with this much longer. My life revolves around making sure he is ready for work/uni..cleaning up his rubbish ....dealing with his 'mates' that come here and think they can party on.....?? I am so absolutely over it. I have given him EVERYTHING......my life ended when I left his father due to violence. The money I have spent...the different schools because he didn't like certain people...the private school and the course last year that cost me thousands. I must be so absolutely useless that my own son can use and abuse my generosity and love?I have next to no friends. I don't really care. I had so many dramas throughout his school years with so called friends and I pass. I have zero help from anyone. I always thought that I have to get him to 18 then if I die it doesn't matter as I have a large insurance policy in my name. I never thought I would make it as I had melanoma and other stuff and now we are here I am surprised. I am sorry this is a bit rambling. I guess I am trying to convey my sheer exhaustion and depression at the state of my life. As I gave everything up for him I have no idea who I am anymore. He is not violent but he does remind me of his dad. In that he gets his way everytime through stubborness and using my age and exhaustion against me. He has his 'mates' come here and I have told him over and over there is to be no alcohol or weed......next thing his mate rocks up with an esky of JD and then this guys Dad calls me to figure out where his JD went? I told him the truth and I reiterated that under my roof I am responsible!All I want is peace! This son of mine is killing me. I love him so much but I am sick of being his mother.

Box Why want my Psychiatrist listen to me?
  • replies: 2

I went to see my new psychiatrist yesterday to let her know I’m not doing well. I have Severe Depression/Anxiety. I have been on medication from 2005 to 2019. Ever since the Pandemic I have not had any care/worked for 4 years, just isolating in my ho... View more

I went to see my new psychiatrist yesterday to let her know I’m not doing well. I have Severe Depression/Anxiety. I have been on medication from 2005 to 2019. Ever since the Pandemic I have not had any care/worked for 4 years, just isolating in my home. It’s all messed up’ & was trying ti get back on track. I let her know that I’m not sleeping correctly which is making me mentally/physically sick. I’m so exhausted from sleep deprivation & lying in my bed just staring at the walls to find myself a solution. She prescribed medication for my anxiety/depression . Which is not working for me. No sleep at all’ which makes my anxiety worse. What does a person need to do to get the help I’m needed. I asked to be put back on my old regimens but she refused & didn’t listen to my concerns. At least with this I could function at my job’ sleep at least 6 hrs. & live a somewhat ok’ life.I’m so tired of not getting g the help I. Red. It’s just like a joke the way the DR. Just dangle your life with treatments that don’t work . I’m not sure what to do now

Lucy- Depressed son
  • replies: 8

My son is 19 and is depressed ( did the checklist and scored “very high”) but will not let me help him and doesn’t want to help himself. He works full time but as soon as he gets home he smokes weed, we have tried to get him to stop or cut down but h... View more

My son is 19 and is depressed ( did the checklist and scored “very high”) but will not let me help him and doesn’t want to help himself. He works full time but as soon as he gets home he smokes weed, we have tried to get him to stop or cut down but he won’t. He doesn’t eat all day until he is stoned and is underweight. he doesn’t have any friends but connects with people at work. He’s lost his confidence and I just do not know how to help him. I’ve tried to get him to see a doctor and have given him at John’s wort to try but doesn’t seem interested. We have tried getting him to exercise with no luck, I’m at my wits end.

tirawa jobseeking
  • replies: 1

I don't really know if this is the place to put this but I just wanted to vent a bit, I suppose, and see if there's any advice or anything out there. I've struggled with pretty bad mental illness basically my whole life and it really impeded me over ... View more

I don't really know if this is the place to put this but I just wanted to vent a bit, I suppose, and see if there's any advice or anything out there. I've struggled with pretty bad mental illness basically my whole life and it really impeded me over the years, I didn't graduate high school because I couldn't handle it and then I immediately went into trying to complete a bridging course and have been struggling with that ever since. I'm maybe finally about to finish a course that's meant to be 1 year but it's taken me nearly 4 years to complete. I can't really study full time with my mental illness, and the jobseeker pay isn't really enough for me to live on as someone who rents in a city and can't really just move. I got a job through APM disability last year and it's all been really optimistic since then but after July they found they can't afford to keep hiring me so I'm not really getting any shifts anymore unless they're completely understaffed. So I've been looking for work for about 4 weeks since I was informed of this change, and I came into it kind of optimistic, I have work experience now and I'm pretty capable so surely I can get an upgrade and find a better paying job and start really getting comfy. But I'm realising I seriously overestimated myself. I've been applying to mostly lower level government jobs, administration and the like, and haven't heard back from any of them. Then I started applying to retail jobs which I'm also not hearing back from. Not even an interview. Pretty much every day I get an email saying I didn't get another job; otherwise it's just radio silence. I'm studying part time and I just have nothing to do with most of my time now. I just sit there day in day out hoping one of these jobs will call me until 5pm kicks around and then I just wait out the time I need to be awake so I can go to sleep and start the wait again. I can't resort to hobbies really, since most of them cost money and I'm completely broke between bills and rent and food delivery (food preparation is obviously not easy at all when you're mentally ill). I feel stupid for even thinking anyone would want to hire me. I have one year of retail experience at 23 years old and absolutely 0 academic achievements, I can't even pick up the phone most of the time. It feels terrible and it's so frustrating. I hate feeling this useless and unwanted.