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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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emi39 Family issues
  • replies: 8

I asked my father a question last night and he got angry at me. Every 6-ish months he gets in these moods where he says we are ungrateful, he hates us and that he is going to leave us. My question wasn't offensive or negative - I even clarified it, I... View more

I asked my father a question last night and he got angry at me. Every 6-ish months he gets in these moods where he says we are ungrateful, he hates us and that he is going to leave us. My question wasn't offensive or negative - I even clarified it, I meant it in a nice way (the question was: what are we going to live in? (because we might be moving)). I feel guilty and bad because he takes it out on everyone. I feel bad for my sister (as it was her birthday today). Sometimes I feel like if I wasn't here he wouldn't get mad all the time. It's like walking on broken glass and I'm exhausted. He doesn't love me. My mother also doesn't care - only when he gets mad at her.I'm stuck in a remote location, I don't have a license (they never taught me), and I have pets I can't/don't leave (geese, ducks, chickens, dogs and guinea pigs). But He get's really mad he yells, says we are horrible and ungrateful, when we walk past he asks if we're happy because we cause them to split (he threatens to split up with my mother (he has done this a few times, but never actually does it,) and says he's going to leave. After a while he becomes happy and acts like it's a joke. I noticed these outbursts occur after he talks to his friend on the phone (his friend isn't a nice person - he's nasty to his ex-wives and is somewhat of an alcoholic, but lives in QLD). It used to be my older brother but now I face the brunt - everything I do, I ask he get's mad at. I just feel like sometimes it would be better if I wasn't here but I don't want to leave my pets. I feel scared, stressed and horrible. I can't eat, sleep. Last time he did this was on the 1/1/2026 - snice that date I've been sleeping with headphones on because I'm scared I'll hear them talking about me. I'm 22, I know I'm an adult and I can leave, but I would never leave my pets with them. I guess I just have to wait it out - apologies don't work he doesn't accept it and it make him angrier.

Cloudydays1 My parents staying in a toxic domestic violence relationship
  • replies: 3

I’m 35. I live away from my family. My parents have a very unhealthy, physically and emotionally abusive relationship. My mother is a hoarder with 2 households full of collected items. My father is an alcoholic. My siblings and I grew up in this toxi... View more

I’m 35. I live away from my family. My parents have a very unhealthy, physically and emotionally abusive relationship. My mother is a hoarder with 2 households full of collected items. My father is an alcoholic. My siblings and I grew up in this toxic environment witnessing physical and verbs abuse, and are still being subjected to it. My parents fight and it escalates to physical violence. My mother calls us feeling unsafe but will not seek help or leave him. We have begged her but she ends the conversation with us and moves on like her situation isn’t that bad. They sweep it all under the rug and pretend like everything is fine. They are both miserable. I can’t accept them putting on an act anymore. They want to come and visit me to visit my kids but I do not want them in my home pretending like everything is okay. I feel so guilty because I want them to see their grandkids - they are their only happiness. I am also scared that me not allowing them to come will cause more fighting. I am feeling so depressed. How do you help someone who refuses to be helped and potentially cause more fights by demanding that they sort out there issues before visiting again. I feel physically sick about it - everyone around them who knows about this situation does too. Please help

ELTee Medically Terminated from work
  • replies: 2

Hi, I had lung cancer surgery earlier this year. Recovery was going well and they got all the cancer. I returned to work and was working from home. My employer, who I have been with for over 30 years, decided I needed an independent medical assessmen... View more

Hi, I had lung cancer surgery earlier this year. Recovery was going well and they got all the cancer. I returned to work and was working from home. My employer, who I have been with for over 30 years, decided I needed an independent medical assessment. This ended up in me completing tasks, with an Exercise Physiologist, none of which were related to my job. I actually injured myself further. Now they have terminated me. I have suffered depression & anxiety for years, but this is next level. I'm finding it hard to function. I just want to hide from the world. I am totally devastated this has happened. Yes I have a lawyer and have lodged claims through WorkSafe. Its this hollow feeling of nothing, clearly I was just a number, they don't seem to care. I can do my job still. They decided I couldn't. I just needed to vent, so fed up with crying & panic attacks. Has anyone else been through this? I've lost my identity and right now I don't know who I am or even how to exist.Thanks for reading xx

Doors24 Dealing with end of life as I knew it. Massive changes in my life.
  • replies: 32

Hello, The last seven months have been nothing but massive upheaval and changes. I already suffered from anxiety and depression. These changes have made everything worse and I feel so isolated. I went through and currently am still experiencing a med... View more

Hello, The last seven months have been nothing but massive upheaval and changes. I already suffered from anxiety and depression. These changes have made everything worse and I feel so isolated. I went through and currently am still experiencing a medical trauma starting seven months ago. But life still went on whilst I was having to deal with that. I lost my amazing dog due to illness and old age whilst I was having treatment and there was nothing I could physically, mentally or emotionally do for her. I was too unwell to help her. She wasn’t alone. As a family dog. But 15 years and she is just gone and the house is so quiet. She was quite a large dog,so her presence is so noticeably absent in just space alone. And that was only two weeks ago. Then just two weeks later, my family member who has lived with me down my end of the house, moved out. We have spent our childhood together and almost 15 years of our adult lives co-habitating in this space together. Indirectly, we became part of each other’s daily routine by just sounds alone. Even if we didn’t speak directly to each other, we could hear each other living our lives in our rooms. I’d hear their alarms go off in the morning. I could hear them working from home during the day on phone calls and walking up and down the hallway to get coffees or something to eat. At night I could hear them laughing at the tv, taking a shower in the bathroom or even using the toilet spray in the toilet. (The walls are thin in this house). I have become so used to those daily sounds being in my life. I could go to sleep at night comforted by the sounds coming out of the room next door. I felt and have always felt safe living with this sibling being in the next room. And in the space of just 16 hours on the one day, they packed up all their belongings and emptied that room. That morning they lived here. By that night they no longer live here. And they aren’t coming back to live here again. They have called their new place their home verbally. And whilst I am genuinely happy for that sibling to have finally found their own space and independence. It is just another loss too quickly after the last. I don’t know what to do with myself. I don’t know how to see all these spaces empty or once belong to someone else, but now know that they don’t. It is so incredibly sad and overwhelming and I can’t process it fast enough and my depression is getting worse. I feel so isolated. I can’t talk about anything I am feeling with the family members left in this house. I have tried and tried. They are emotionally unavailable and are legitimately unable to have real connection type of conversations. The person I was connected to the most in this house,is the one who moved out. I just don’t know what to do. I have to walk past their empty door everytime I leave my own room. The silence is so prominent. The grief is so raw. I dream about my dog at night. My house used to be full of life and happiness and now it is full of unhappy people and no connection to one another. We can’t have a discussion together. We are all feeling like there is a dark shadow over our house and waiting for the next thing to happen. I am all alone. Being unwell, I can’t leave this space either. I just need someone to talk to or be heard or have a human connection with. I am not dealing with this well. Any changes are hard for me to process and just this year alone, there has been too many massive changes in short succession. Thank you for taking the time to read this or respond.Doors 24

Earth Girl People tell me I'm doing things wrong, but won't explain to me exactly what and how
  • replies: 44

People from school keep indirectly telling me to do better, but they never directly explained to me exactly what it is that I am doing wrong. I want to be a nice person, and I try to be, but it's really hard figuring out what the problem is when peop... View more

People from school keep indirectly telling me to do better, but they never directly explained to me exactly what it is that I am doing wrong. I want to be a nice person, and I try to be, but it's really hard figuring out what the problem is when people are very vague about it. They indirectly tell me... That I'm vain, superficial and socially fake, but don't explain how/what it is that I'm doing that makes me so.That I'm stubborn, but don't explain how.That I'm unforgiving That I only want what's best for meThat I lack warmth and humilityThat I'm materialisticThat I'm pretentiousThat I believe in stereotypes That I'm manipulative (I've looked this word up many times, but still don't get it, but it's definitely something that I wouldn't want to be because apparently, it's sort of like controlling people in a really mean way?) I also don't know how exactly I am doing this though or what it means. That I'm heartless - If you're going to call someone this especially, PLEASE explain what exactly they are doing that makes them this because nobody wants to be like this. That I don't say please and thank you - I use to not do this a lot for a stage when I was a teenager when I was using another forum, but I realized I was being rude and it probably didn't make people feel good even though they were helping me so I started doing it again so I don't see how I am still doing this? There have been times other than when I used that site when it didn't occur to me to say thank you, but it wasn't because I didn't appreciate them. I struggle a lot socially so sometimes I will think "that was nice what that person did for me" and then think "Oh, I probably should have said thank you." I say it when it occurs to me though, because I want people to know that I appreciate what they've done for me. That I don't let others have opinions - again, no examples given.That I'm jealous of others instead of just being envious and using that to get better - I don't know how I'm still acting jealous?That I'm unfriendlySelfishHypocriticalEtc... If you're going to tell someone these things, but don't explain to them how they are doing these things/acting this way, it kind of defeats the purpose. And when I politely ask them if they could please explain how I am only caring about material things or what stereotypes I believe in for example, they just get mad at me. It's really hard to stop doing something wrong when you don't know exactly what it is that you are doing wrong.

Guest_13738758 Relationship breakdown
  • replies: 1

It’s really hard finding the right words to describe all of this, basically my relationship is breaking down I’m exhausted, the communication is gone it’s either one screaming at the other but no one is listening we’re both unheard and it’s completel... View more

It’s really hard finding the right words to describe all of this, basically my relationship is breaking down I’m exhausted, the communication is gone it’s either one screaming at the other but no one is listening we’re both unheard and it’s completely chaos, desperate to not damage each other it seems to be the only thing we do we are both wanting to be heard but not willing to listen and I’m scared if we continue we’ll do permanent damage to each other I dealt with a lot of abuse early on and held onto the hurt over the years and used it as fuel in every argument. It damaged him brutally but it was a by product of his entail abuse in the first place now a few years later his doing the exact same thing I did were on a crash course to heartbreak and I can’t stop it i don’t know what to do anymore

Guest_10511 Depression and isolation
  • replies: 2

I was hospitalized 2 times for depression and it lasted for months and no one even visited. I'm the loneliest creature in the world.

I was hospitalized 2 times for depression and it lasted for months and no one even visited. I'm the loneliest creature in the world.

Mood_Swinger Feeling rather flat lately
  • replies: 1

I've realised I'm feeling quite flat lately and I think depression has been creeping slowly back in. I have a long history of mental health issues with a diagnosis of Bipolar II back in 2011. Medicated since, I've had plenty of hospitalisations over ... View more

I've realised I'm feeling quite flat lately and I think depression has been creeping slowly back in. I have a long history of mental health issues with a diagnosis of Bipolar II back in 2011. Medicated since, I've had plenty of hospitalisations over the years but have been stable for the past 5 or so. I recently started reducing some of my medications with my Pyschiatrist and was going fine but have noticed symptoms coming back. Tiredness, apathy, loss of apetite, inability to concentrate, slowed speech etc just to name a few. I see him in a couple if weeks again so of coyrse I'll bring it up. I'm hoping it passes but would love suggestions if anyone has been in a similar situation as to what they do to bring themselves out of these "slumps". I don't want to go back on more medication and my life is going great otherwise. I have no "reason" to be depressed.

Guest_63852277 It's killing me
  • replies: 2

I've lived alone for most of my life I'm now 45. People weren't ment to live this way. I've struggled with depression for around 20 years.My last job I was bullied to the point I was barley functioning. Anxiety in the workplace is hell never knowing ... View more

I've lived alone for most of my life I'm now 45. People weren't ment to live this way. I've struggled with depression for around 20 years.My last job I was bullied to the point I was barley functioning. Anxiety in the workplace is hell never knowing if your going to be verbally abused at any time. Tiptoeing on eggshells. To make things worse I recently fractured my foot which was horrible, struggling to get around and living alone was a nightmare. On the service I appear fine but its a fake persona. To everyone I appear ok but on the inside I'm dieing. Anxiety attacks coming more frequently and I don't think my meds are working. I had to quit my job because I couldn't take it anymore and now am struggling with next to no money, bills gathering and no job. I'm still trying to find work, every interview I've had is an anxiety session, my confidence is gone. During the interviews I constantly hear the put downs that were said to me in my previous job and I struggle horribly. I've recently had to sell some of my personal possessions just to get by. I now barely sleep, feel like failure and spend days in bed. I desperately need help and don't know where to turn. I'm in a nightmare and just want out!!!!

Guest_12460052 I don't know how to get through this
  • replies: 1

Hi, I am currently an overseas student studying masters and my depression got worse this couple of months. I have a hurdle exams which is very practical tomorrow and another two hurdles that is coming next we. I am struggling these exams even when I ... View more

Hi, I am currently an overseas student studying masters and my depression got worse this couple of months. I have a hurdle exams which is very practical tomorrow and another two hurdles that is coming next we. I am struggling these exams even when I am well but now I barely have any energy just to get out of my bed. At the same time, I have muscle spasms around my body and I have been seeking help but no doctors know what is going on.... Also I am struggling with insomnia too. I don't know how I am get through this by myself alone in abroad.

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