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Struggling with life
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Hi all recently I left my job of 4 years as felt it was time for change and job I took turned out to be horrible therefore mutually parted ways. Since I landed a job and was meant to start a week later then got told the job had been pulled so back to square one. I have never struggled to get a job in my field it's normally easy as but given the time of year the market is slow and i feel like i am getting nowhere really very minimal call backs. Being home so much definately putting a stress on myrelationship to the point where I just feel like im nothing but a hindrance more then anything. Plus side is been great spending time with my little one who's 4 months old. Wife is also on maternity leave and her pay is not enough for us to survive so been using some of our savings and I just been uber driving to get by and that's not much. I guess I am venting more then anything i just feel like their is no light at the end of the tunnel and by time their is I would of just self destructed and ruined everything around me. I feel a pressure so bad to find a job and Il be honest I just don't know how to manage the situation at the moment and the stress around it. Thanks for listening
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Thank you so much for sharing your story with us, we are sure that your experience is relatable for many.
What you are going through sounds very overwhelming, and it makes sense that you would be feeling the pressures of not having a job in your field or enough money to feel comfortable. I can see how hard you are working to put yourself out there and to try to find new ways to make money, this isn’t easy to do.
When there are many things out of our control, it can be common for our mind to go to all kinds of places that reinforce the idea that we aren't enough or that things won't change. These thoughts are allowed to be there and allowing ourselves to feel the fear or sadness we are experiencing can actually be very helpful in processing these feelings. (When we try to push them away, or conversely, become really entrenched in them, they often grow louder!)
Writing your feelings down, talking to a friend, or chatting with a counsellor could be helpful here. You could always call us or explore a mental health care plan with your GP - you can request bulk-billing options in order to obtain affordable sessions with a psychologist.
As for what you could do right now, I encourage you to look at what is within your control moment to moment. I know how frustrating and disheartening it can feel when you are doing so much to try and make things happen for yourself, but don't seem to be moving forward.
(Important to note: each effort is helping you move forward, even if it doesn’t seem that way at the time).
However, saying something to yourself like, "I have applied for multiple jobs today, I am feeling frustrated, but I can see my little one beaming up at me - I am going to spend 10 minutes focusing fully on them and see how I feel" can be very helpful. Approaching your days with as much self-compassion as possible will help and make things feel just that little bit more easeful.
You deserve to be kind to yourself, especially when things are hard.
Remember that you are doing your absolute best here. We are always available to talk things out as you need. Let us know how you go. 😊
Warm regards,
Sophie M.
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Dear Nissan9,
I think all the things you are describing are normal and valid feeling for all job hunters.
There is pressure to find a new job and at the same time, life still goes on. You need to provide for your family, and I feel that it is fair that you are stressed out and overwhelmed.
It is great that you are able to Uber to fill in the gap a little. And that you are able to create some memories with your baby.
Just take it a day at a time. You never know what is coming tomorrow.
Please take care of yourself too.
ABC01
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Hang in there, Nissan9. Like you, it's already 9 month unemployed for me, and counting, and I work in IT. There's just too many people out there who I need to compete with, like applicants for a role gets around at least 200 job seekers, sometimes 300+. But I just pray for mental strength so I can endure the struggle. Stay positive and keep sending application, but don't raise your expectations so you won't be disappointed. Eventually you'll find one if this govt in truth, is really saying unemployment is low and open roles are up, or they're just lying to make them look good come election time. Stay strong.