here i go again

[audreysquinta]

I have been managing my depression for two years with medication and have started to feel the vale coming over me again. At the moment I am dealing with a teenage son who is testing both mine and my husbands limits. My husband is blaming me for my sons behavior and isn't talking to me. I know this feeling very well, this feeling of sadness and hopelessness I thought I could fight my depression without medication before but I ended up on suicide watch before I knew that I needed help. Now I am on the medication and this feeling is starting to take hold of me again I am not sure what to do.  

[Lucas]

If your husband knows your condition then he needs to be more supportive.

"Blame' gets no one anywhere, I hope you find your strong and find some happiness. Remember ...teenagers rebel and push limits. Doesn't mean they don't love you.

[S_A_D_]

I am a son. My mother and I both have anxiety and depression. I am trying to repair our relationship. We have both developed defence mechanisms and bad habits to survive each other and the authoritarian wrath of my father, her first ex-husband. We're all terrified of each other, counselling services are involved, and everyone is being very stubborn and pig headed. Your

story sounds a lot like ours from a few years ago. Gradually things get worse as the problems are left unaddressed.  I suggest researching 3 basic things: Maslow's Heirarchy,  Erikkson's developmental theory, and operant conditioning: the 11 problems with the use of punishment, and the benefits of a focus on positive reinforcement shaping. You have the power, tools and incentives to prevent your family from turning dysfunctional.  What will you do now? 

[geoff]

dear Audrey, is it fair for your husband to blame you, surely not, as your teenage son is going as far as he can, and therefore testing your limits.

Does your son want something that you disagree with, but your husband feels that it will be alright, you may let us know about this if you want to.

Overcoming depression is always a great feeling, the weight of this illness lifted off our shoulders, but this doesn't necessarily mean that we will be free from relapsing, this can start at any time, if our situation worsens, and this happens more times than not.

Unfortunately we can't avoid this, all we can do is to go into our survival plan, that is, the same way we were able to overcome it before, if that is possible, to contact our doctor and ask for a referral to see a psych., but you have to keep in mind of the pressure that maybe causing this to happen, and this may not be easy to do.

And in your case this maybe a difficult part to your problem, as it seems as though you have both your son as well as your husband both ganging up against you.

I hope that I am wrong. L Geoff. x