Grieving about a relationship that could've been

[ImAllTalone]

I want to write here since writing is the only way I cope with hard times

I'm in high school, 16, about average. There was a girl I really liked, she always brought me out of my comfort zone in a way that made me happy and I keep clinging onto her uniqueness. I then found out she was already dating someone and that person was one of my good friends

I don't know how to feel, I want to cry but all I feel is emptiness. Sometimes anger helps me get over it but it's so hard to get angry like this, And it all had to start during exam season for HS so I've already got alot on my plate

I don't know if I should tell a doctor about my current state, I've started eating less and pretty much only eating 8 hours after I wake up, even then I don't feel hungry.

I share a class with them and force myself to look away every time they're near each other, I want to stay as friends and celebrate said friendship but I can't stand watching them together so I've pretty much isolated myself from that friend group

And she was the only girl where I felt the urge to tell her my feelings, I usually just keep things quiet due to anxiety but I felt strongly enough to plan to do so after exams, only to have it ripped away.

I want to get help but I don't know what to tell my doctor, I don't wanna tell him this story

I hate this feeling, all it does it feed into my self hatred of being weaker than everyone else, including my height. I'm an introvert by heart but I end up valuing love so much that it breaks me. This wasn't even a rejection and I don't think they even saw me the same way, they were just being nice, And I was just overthinking stuff and was left feeling hurt in the process

I desperately can't get her out of my head, all day it's just this and I've lost motivation to do anything, I'm just tired

If you're still reading this, thank you, I don't know how long this'll take for me to get over but I'm glad you're here

[Petal22]

Hi ImAllTalone,

Im sorry this has happened to you I understand that it would have felt heart breaking.

Maybe talking to your gp would be a good idea.

I understand that this feels really hard at the moment but just give it time, things will get easier for you.

You never know what the future holds for you I’m sure there is an amazing girl out there for you……..or maybe this girl will be single in the future and then if you feel you want to you could disclose your feelings.

[geoff]

Hello ImAllTalone, it takes courage to post a comment and from hat you've said there could be many other people who can simulate with your story.

You can just tell your doctor that you aren't feeling well, physically you're OK, but troubled over something that's happened and then take it from there.

This girl you really like who has a partner, also a friend of yours is always disappointing, but if I can say they are young and the chance of them ending this association may be high, because only being 16, and please don't feel upset by me saying this, but his chances of moving on are rather high, which will enable you to grab her as quickly as possible.

Just because she is going out with him, doesn't mean she won't be thinking of you and if this becomes too strong, then she may want to break up with him, who knows what the future entails.

Try not to lose motivation because if they do part ways, then you won't be ready to ask her out, plus you can also try and humour her, you may be more fun than what he is, and this could be the reason why she may want to break up with him.

The same situation happened to me, years ago, and I ended up marrying her for 25 years, the same could happen to you.

Geoff.

[ImAllTalone]

Hey thanks for the reply and advice

I don't really know at this point, I don't know how serious their relationship is since

- I have seen them be able to seperate eachother

- They haven't come out and told anyone of it

I appreciate your advice though, I just don't wanna get my hopes up too high and get disappointed but the idea of there being a chance helps me get through it

[Petal22]

Hi ImAllTalone,

I second Geoff 😊 your still in with a chance…. Maybe trya bit of flirtation

[geoff]

Hello ImAllTalone, may be they haven't told anyone yet is because they just want to talk to each other and it's not as serious as you believe.

When she is alone approach her and start talking about something she is keen on doing or watching, establish a link with her.

Geoff.

[tranzcrybe]

Dating is the natural follow on to being a good friend.

Continue being that friend to both (as you always were) and be happy for (or at least accepting of) your friends and gracious in not acting sooner... this time.

If it is meant to be, your time will come and you will stand a better chance inside the friendship group than out.