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Feeling so lonely and sad

Friendship
Community Member

I believe I have been depressed for sometime, have spoken to doctors had counselling but just can't shake it, yes I do feel suicidal my main concern is WHY am I here I give nothing, all of my very close friends have moved away, and others have given up on me because it is so hard for me to make an effort they think I am bumping them off, to people at work my family parents and children I am my usual happy go lucky person and nothing could possibly be wrong. 

I want to start going out and having fun again but because it seems such a hurdle it's easier to stay at home and watch tv in my bedroom.

please help 

2 Replies 2

geoff
Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

dear Friendship, it's an awful feeling having to go through depression, it can just strike us at any time, and then our whole life has been lost, lost to the beast who destroys our soul.

It doesn't matter how well you might be travelling, if it has you in it's sights, you can't hide from it, and then it's a long time before you can recover.

Being 'happy' to your work mates, family and kids, is only pretending to be happy, but deep down you're not, your just a miserable wreck.

You aren't 'bumping your friends' off, it's just that they don't want to have anything to do with you, they don't want to have cope with a depressed person, and they were once our 'friends', but true friends stick by you no matter what, they would expect this if they were sick wouldn't they.

It's much easier to say that you want to go out and enjoy yourself, but there is no spark that fires you up to do so, and that's because of depression.

It's not a process that we can do straight away, wish we could, but it's not possible, our mind has to be retrained and this isn't easy at all.

Once I overcame depression, but this doesn't make me completely depression free, it's still there I know, but I have learnt on how to slow it down until the point when I am feeling OK again, so you could say that I can hold it down with my hand, in a stupid analogy.

By wanting to start your life again so that you can go out and enjoy yourself, read some material information, like travelling overseas if this interests you, or buying some clothes, building a front fence etc., this may stimulate your brain again. It won't happen over night, but the important issue here is not to think to yourself  'I can't do this', instead think of the positive aspects, and see how you go.

I am worried for you so please reply to us and keep this communication open. Geoff.

 

S_A_D_
Community Member

I agree with Geoff. Please have a conversation with us.