Feeling so depressed

[Guest_94608298]

I was sexually assaulted last year and as a result fell pregnant. I was going through a lot of stressors at the time including possibly being homeless with 4 young kids as a Single Mum, financial stress and also without a car. 

I ended up being talked out of an abortion by a close friend and my GP whom both appeared to be very pro-life. I have regretted not having an abortion and my mental health deterioated throughout the pregnancy. I than got to the point i i could no longer look after myself or my children. Every day i have struggled with night terrors, anxiety, panic attacks and depression and had to be on medication. Ive had to give up my independency with my kids and move in with family for help. Im due to give birth next week and am extremely anxious. I am giving the baby up for adoption but i wish i wasnt going through any of this and still regret not having gone through with the abortion. 

Im so depressed and miserable pretty much every day. I dont know how to get through this. Nothing in me wants to go through labour or childbirth but theres no other way forward. I feel so much regret for where I am today.

[Sophie_M]

Hi Seekinghope25
 
Thank you so much for your raw and honest post. We are so deeply sorry to hear that you experienced sexual assault. Abuse of any form is never okay. Please know that you're in a safe space here, with a lovely community of kind and understanding people - no matter what is happening for you.  

It sounds like you did the very best that you could for yourself in what is an incredibly difficult and overwhelming situation. You were able to reach out for help and have made sure that you have some extra support by moving back in with your parents. While none of this may be what you had envisioned, your ability to take these steps during such a distressing time was hugely brave.

It is completely understandable to be feeling anxious about the next few weeks. We want to make sure that you have some supports that you can reach out to if ever you want to talk it through some more. The Pregnancy, Birth and Baby website has a great list of available supports here: https://www.pregnancybirthbaby.org.au/pregnancy-helpline-numbers.

We are here to support you and you are not alone. Thank you so much for sharing here. We are always here for you.

Kind regards,   
Sophie M