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Depression

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Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

Chris_B Are you looking to support someone else with depression? PLEASE READ before posting
  • replies: 0

This forum is for people seeking support for their own mental health issues. If you're posting on behalf of someone else with a mental health issue that you're concerned about, please have a look at this section of our forums: Supporting family and f... View more

This forum is for people seeking support for their own mental health issues. If you're posting on behalf of someone else with a mental health issue that you're concerned about, please have a look at this section of our forums: Supporting family and friends with a mental health condition It's full of threads from people who have family members and friends going through anxiety, depression or other related conditions. Have a read through the threads there, and feel free to take part in the discussions. Below are also some helpful beyondblue resources you might want to look through first as well: Supporting someone Have the conversation

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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Brain_fog Accepting depression…
  • replies: 1

Today was a very low day…I think it is the point I am accepting that I can’t push it down anymore and accepting I am depressed. I have been an angry at my partner for causing my sad moods while he may trigger the feeling he is not responsible for how... View more

Today was a very low day…I think it is the point I am accepting that I can’t push it down anymore and accepting I am depressed. I have been an angry at my partner for causing my sad moods while he may trigger the feeling he is not responsible for how deep I fall although I still blame him when I’m in that full moment of darkness. I am so tired. I don’t want to get out of bed. I walked the dogs and cried and panicked the whole time, this used to be my way to relax! I was physically exhausted by the end it felt like the dogs carried/dragged me home. I was just low and teary all the way to work. Took me 40 minutes to stop the tears and make myself get out of the car. I struggled all day with a gapping hole in my chest. I came home and slept for 2 hours at 4 in the arvo. One small negative email came through and sends me back into a dark hole again, crying and drained. this is me today…and many days now more like this then there is good. I don’t actually know what to do now….that’s why I am here… maybe just writing it down will help, but any advice would be appreciated. I haven’t always felt this way. I have always been hard on myself but not this low and drained and tired. I did have brain surgery a few years ago, then a seizure and now I’m taking keppra which may contribute but I think it’s beyond that now.

Beets Lost and no direction
  • replies: 3

Hey, I’m feeling lost and like there is no direction for me to go in. I usually follow my gut and persue anything that interests me however, I can’t latch onto anything and everything seems so exhausting. I’m a bright side kind of person and don’t kn... View more

Hey, I’m feeling lost and like there is no direction for me to go in. I usually follow my gut and persue anything that interests me however, I can’t latch onto anything and everything seems so exhausting. I’m a bright side kind of person and don’t know how to talk to others without this lens. I’m wondering if anyone has advice about how I can sustain direction/joy/flow in my life and not be so alone with this bleh unproductive version of myself

white knight Meltdowns, trust your observer
  • replies: 3

I had a major meltdown this week. I've been with Beyondblue for 10 years and a CC for 9, advising others of my lived experience, but nothing much helps when a meltdown comes along. A small trigger is all that set me off, the tone of my wife's voice o... View more

I had a major meltdown this week. I've been with Beyondblue for 10 years and a CC for 9, advising others of my lived experience, but nothing much helps when a meltdown comes along. A small trigger is all that set me off, the tone of my wife's voice over where I'd left an empty soft drink can. During the following hour or so I was off the rails, my whole world was crumbling and at one stage had a swag packed. An indicator of the irrational thinking was that later I emptied that bag to find a change of clothes and a battery drill. I remember putting the drill in there, so why did I? Because I wasnt thinking straight at all. My wife was repeating herself a lot "its not real, Tony you are exploding everything in your mind" and "it's just a can". I was saying "it's how you said it". Yes, I'm extremely sensitive but to the point whereby a tone of voice can set me off like this is frightening. A few days later I'm full of guilt and the reason is obvious, my reactions weren't justified but they are a reflection of 1/ the level of illness my depression can reach 2/ triggers are a topic I need to discuss and find ways to avoid and 3/ I should listen to my carer and friends as to what is reasonable and what I'm catastrophising. The core of my issue is that while catastrophising I'm trying to justify my actions and reactions with beliefs that it isnt my fault, defending myself to the end. But when it happens again I'll remember those words "its not real", because that will tell me my reactions are way off the charts. This event told me that regardless of our experience in mental health that we are not protected from the elements of our illness, the same symptoms all those with depression get. Yes, I fooled myself into believing I'd mastered the diversion necessary to avoid these events. So there is positives in every event and in this instance I will endeavour to "trust my partner" for her observations and judgement. Meltdowns are hard to combat but a good carer deserves our trust, faith and perspective. The least my carer deserves is for me to chill out, take time alone to settle and share a cuppa with a calm talk. Comments? TonyWK

amd1953 A Sad Tale
  • replies: 4

Once upon a time, I used to think how wonderful it would be to be normal, like everyone else around me. To fit in and be accepted for who and what I was. As a child I watched adults for clues on how to behave and what to say to get through life. I ac... View more

Once upon a time, I used to think how wonderful it would be to be normal, like everyone else around me. To fit in and be accepted for who and what I was. As a child I watched adults for clues on how to behave and what to say to get through life. I actually looked up to some of them as role models. But as a child I was always on the outside, looking in. Always the punchbag or the scapegoat or the object of ridicule and humiliation. Always told what to do. Always kicked in the head when I need reassurance about myself. The bullying got worse at high school and it did have an effect on me. I tried to put on a brave face and be happy as though I didn't care if the other kids liked me or not. I used to tell myself that when I became an adult everything would change for the better. Good luck with that one Charlie Brown. Even to this day, I have not discovered one person who has seen me face to face, looked me in the eye and given me the thumbs up for being me. Not once. Never. Ever have I received the nod of approval. With the exception of my friend Emotions26 on this forum I have no one else to talk to on this planet. How sad is that? I've tried being me. I've tried putting myself out there. All to no avail. Nobody wants to know. Nobody cares. I just don't fit anyone's idea of a human being. I used to see myself as a Quasimodo like figure, swinging through the rafters in the Notre Dame Cathedral. Watching everyone else going about their business and living their lives and being happy. I used to ask myself over and over and over again. What is wrong with me that I am invisible. Am I such a wretched human being that I am shunned and despised so readily by everyone I meet?Well, I have all the answers now because I am older and wise than I have ever been before. I know that everyone has good and bad days and how a person feels about themselves is reflected on the community they inhabit. There doesn't have to be something wrong with me for people to be hypocritical, selfish and rude. So now, I have cleared my mind of all the reasons why I used to hate myself. Now I have finally reached the age where I just don't care what goes through other people's minds or what they think of me. That is now history. It's gone. Now I am retired, I don't have to fight with people at work everyday or continually prove what a wonderful guy I am. At last I am free to be me.Finis.

sar97 Depression and relationship
  • replies: 1

I have lived with feelings of depression and anxiety most of my young adult life. I was officially diagnosed 6 months ago with severe depression/anxiety and BPD. As well as having poly cystic ovarian syndrome. I’m in a long-term supportive relationsh... View more

I have lived with feelings of depression and anxiety most of my young adult life. I was officially diagnosed 6 months ago with severe depression/anxiety and BPD. As well as having poly cystic ovarian syndrome. I’m in a long-term supportive relationship with someone who understands and is dealing with their own anxieties and stress. More recently I have felt I have really hit rock bottom emotionally and am giving up on the relationship to the point of thinking about walking away. I don’t want to make any rash decisions while highly emotional. Would anti-depressants be an option for me? I don’t know if my hormones are intensifying these feelings of depression and anxiety as well because I have recently started the OCP again.

Quilter57 Exhaustion
  • replies: 14

I have had major depression and anxiety for years. Currently I am dealing with several major stressors. Also I am obese and drink too much. I am unbelievably exhausted all the time. I have no energy and want to sleep all day. Any ideas of what might ... View more

I have had major depression and anxiety for years. Currently I am dealing with several major stressors. Also I am obese and drink too much. I am unbelievably exhausted all the time. I have no energy and want to sleep all day. Any ideas of what might give me a kick up the bum and get me going again?

Freakles Depression
  • replies: 2

Hi, lm New to this so sorry.I've suffered all my life with this and had ups and downs, but right now it's feeling different.I had a rough upbringing and lots of different trauma in my life.For the last 10 years I've been suffering with an invisible i... View more

Hi, lm New to this so sorry.I've suffered all my life with this and had ups and downs, but right now it's feeling different.I had a rough upbringing and lots of different trauma in my life.For the last 10 years I've been suffering with an invisible illness called fibromyalgia, so I'm in chronic pain everyday. I also have osteoarthritis in my lower spine and other parts of my body.The last few weeks I'm struggling to put on this front that I always do, to act like life is great, but it's not. I'm lost, lonely and very emotional. I have a great supportive family. I just can't explain how I feel. How do I get myself out of this, never been so bad. I just want to shut myself away and not face it Please help with any advise.Thanks you for reading.BTW have been on regular meds for this.

SergeZ Share your story about coming off antidepressents
  • replies: 3

Hey guys my name is Serge and I decided to come ofd my antidepressants this is my share. Been slowly coming off anti-depressants from the storm I went through in the last 12 months. What an emotional rollercoaster while the brain gets used to normal ... View more

Hey guys my name is Serge and I decided to come ofd my antidepressants this is my share. Been slowly coming off anti-depressants from the storm I went through in the last 12 months. What an emotional rollercoaster while the brain gets used to normal functionality. One day I'm super happy, next day short fuse, can't pick it. But goes to show how anti-depressants just keep you stable. When I'm feeling happy, it's a good high and haven't experienced that level of happiness on anti-depressants. Almost there, the rollercoaster has lessened.

sad-bun Losing work.
  • replies: 1

I work casual, but I am losing shifts due to my chronic pain condition. My boss and superiors chalk it up to "looking after my health" but I can't live like this. I am losing shifts rapidly in favour of people who are less qualified, but simply don't... View more

I work casual, but I am losing shifts due to my chronic pain condition. My boss and superiors chalk it up to "looking after my health" but I can't live like this. I am losing shifts rapidly in favour of people who are less qualified, but simply don't have my issue. I am lost. In my spare time I read, write and create art, but most of those tasks are now fulfilled by AI. Besides, I can't live on zero income. Currently I'm leaching off of my successful partner and it feels horrible. I am becoming redundant in all my fields very fast. I don't know what to do anymore. Who I am, and what I do is collapsing before my eyes. The "normal" fascade I put forward is crumbling. I live in a small remote town, so I have nobody to turn to. My partner is increasingly stressed in his job and it's hard for me to be open about how miserable I've been since moving here. But, by the same token, I've been miserable no matter where I've been, so I feel like I shouldn't really have a say.I thought this could work, until I started losing shifts, until I lost all gusto to create. I'm sick of people telling me to "just learn to code" or something else of the sort. I have no interest in it. What I loved was my job. My job that I've essentially lost because of my chronic pain condition. Where do I go from here? Because of this condition I also make a crappy housewife. I am, in all respects, useless. The energy it takes each day to get up and do daily tasks is enormous. To not pull the plug, excuse myself forever. I'm seeing a psychologist but I don't know how to bring this up. I am a liar. I am my own worst enemy. I put on a brave face so people don't worry. I am the worst.

Man with no name Major Depression, nothing helps
  • replies: 3

Hi all, What do you do when nothing seems to help? I've suffered depression for many years, since my teens (now in 40's). I first went to my doctor in 2001, was put on AD's. Struggled with work, divorced and slid deep into a hole. I have a psychiatri... View more

Hi all, What do you do when nothing seems to help? I've suffered depression for many years, since my teens (now in 40's). I first went to my doctor in 2001, was put on AD's. Struggled with work, divorced and slid deep into a hole. I have a psychiatrist, my second, who helps a bit but mainly gives me prescriptions. Currently taking four different medications. They help but still get bad periods. I have tried CBT and a phycologist which didn't really help. I have a good life, good job that pays me well, good wife and 2 children under 10, no debt apart from mortgage. I work part time and do the school runs etc as my wife works full-time including 2 of 4 weekend a month. For a while our son (7) has been a huge handful and nothing i've tried has worked with him. He'll flip out over the smallest thing and kick and hit and throw things. I've read lots of info to try and educate myself with possible solutions but nothing's worked. I've reacted badly a few times which leads to more depression. I'm smoking again which my wife hates so that is causing friction. Feel like walking off into the sun set but never would because of our kids. Years ago when I was at a bad point I told my family about it but it got swept under the rug. I then admitted myself to hospital for fear of suiciding. I recently again told my mum and she hasn't even asked me if i'm okay since then. I have no one that I can talk to to get it off my chest, which I miss being able to do. I dream of moving back to the country and simplifying things. Get away from the 'must have all these new things' type of life most seem to live. Unfortunately it won't happen. What can you do when the depression never completely goes away? At times i'll go months feeling good but then something sets it off and 'bang' i'm depressed again.