Life is falling apart

[Toddw]

1. I have been suffering from depression since Feb, I have tired 2 medication and there has been complications with both of them, the first one saved me back in 2020 when I had a physical and mental breakdown. Everything goes back a difficult marriage which I have stayed in for years. Which we couldn't have children and tonnes of fertility treatment and crazy amounts of verbal and physical violence to a point I cracked after a bad back injury and 18 mouths of hell happened
2. I was on a certain medication for months and didn't know what happening. I ended up at my parents in bed crying all day and not knowing anything, then I found a doctor that helped me who was train shrink and naturopathy and she save me. Then 3 years later after being normal and off medication for 18 months. I hurt my back again and flood of anxiety came and all the problems started with the meds and not before long the depression set in and marriage I rebuilt collapsed again and I'm back at my elderly parents again off work for last month and not sure what to. Not on any meds. Barely coping and maybe trying a third medication or maybe doing tms treatment or going into a treatment clinic. My life is a mess always crying and now have zero energy. That probably on half what happened in the last 15 years with marriage and mental health. I just had to get that off my chest. Thank you 

[Sophie_M]

Hi Toddw,   

Thank you for sharing such a brave and honest post here. We are glad you were able to open up to this community and hope that is has felt helpful to get it off your chest.    

You have been through a lot and it can feel disheartening when another medication does not seem to be working. This is something many of us here will be able to relate to – the challenge of finding the combination of supports that works for us.  

Please know you can talk to Blue Knot about this on 1300 657 380, every day between 9-5 (AEDT). Their counsellors are experienced in working with people who have experienced complex trauma. They also have some resources on their website which could be useful to visit, particularly the pages on Survivors Self Care. 

The Beyond Blue helpline is here for you as well, on 1300 22 4636, or via our webchat or email here. It can make a real difference having someone to talk to especially in moments of distress.    

Thank you again for your courage and strength in sharing your story. It might take some time for our kind community to spot your post, but we’re sure they will soon be here to offer their support and understanding.     

Kind regards, 

Sophie M