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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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lost_echo i feel like i dont deserve to be depressed
  • replies: 3

my life right now is great, even amazing. i recently got into my dream uni at usyd, i got a new part time job that pays me well, i dont have to worry about exams and studying about the hsc and i have really loving parents but im depressed. more depre... View more

my life right now is great, even amazing. i recently got into my dream uni at usyd, i got a new part time job that pays me well, i dont have to worry about exams and studying about the hsc and i have really loving parents but im depressed. more depressed than usual. for the past couple months i have been so depressed i feel so unworthy of being so. i know that you dont need a reason to have depression but nonetheless, i still feel like i dont deserve it, particularly in a time where so many people are struggling to get by on basic human needs like a roof over their head, nutritious food and groceries etc. our economy is failing and so many people are harshly affected by it while i get to live comfortably. i know i can feel this way even with a good life but it somewhat makes me feel worse. the thoughts of dying is so loud, my dissociation is getting worse to the point i have big chunks of memories that i dont remember, i go for walks and dissociate and when i come back to my senses, i dont even know where i am. i feel so tired and drained, i feel like i have no energy to do anything, my sleep is irregular and i just dont have the will to live... but i know its wrong. i need to live. i need to do this but its so hard. im high functioning in the way that i can do everything that i need to do - do house chores, go to work, do volunteering, talk with my friends and family, workout and read everyday, take meds and go to therapy but why do i feel so empty? i dont know what more i can do to help myself from going further downhill. i know that if i keep going this way, im going to take my life but i cant do that. i need to live. i will live but it feels like im being kept on earth against my will and it tiring. its tiring without me mentally realising it until recognise the dull sensation in my body, the ongoing thoughts of death in my head and the lack of sleep im getting. i love the people around me but i dont know if living for other people and not yourself is right either...

Herenow Is it me?
  • replies: 8

I don't understand. From the outside I have everything you could want but why do I have nothing? For the third day now I've been trying to have some 'fun time' with my wife but that door gets slammed shut (figoratively). After this mornings attempt w... View more

I don't understand. From the outside I have everything you could want but why do I have nothing? For the third day now I've been trying to have some 'fun time' with my wife but that door gets slammed shut (figoratively). After this mornings attempt was rejected I slammed the door and went to work (at home). Then the younger kid started whinging and carrying on and picking fights with the older kid and then started bothering my wife. She completely lost her shit and has driven off somewhere to calm down.We just got back from holiday overseas. Everything was okayish... but somewhere along the line I had a tiff with my wife. The short of it is that I noticed that I was never being asked to join a photo (just her on her own doing a selfie or her and both kids. I complained that it looked like she was having a holiday on her own without me. I complained that she hugs the kids more than me, that she never tries to hold my hand, and that she hasn't said 'I love you' since I don't know when. I feel like I'm chasing her all the time and although I was getting some intimacy it seems rather one sided.Our youngest kid (10) has definitely got some sort of mental issue going on. Either ADHD or ODD, with some sort of anxiety and impulsiveness thrown in. He's always loud, always annoying, and frankly drives us to the edge every day. He's a brilliant kid - but also intolerable. My wife has been against getting him officially diagnosed although her stance on that has softened over the holiday. The dr just prescribed my wife melatonin just before the holidays and said she has some depression going on. The melatonin ran out on the 30th decebmer and she has not yet had a renewal (not sure if that contributed to this mornings tiff). On occasion in the past (maybe once a year or every two years) she's had a blow up and wanted to leave our 'family'. I'm thinking that may have been undiagnosed depression in light of the recent diagnosis but I don't know. The older kid is the polar opposite. When the younger one is finished with something in 5 minutes - it takes the older one an hour. Take dinner for example - its virtually impossible to eat because the younger one is finished before we start, and then the older one takes an hour after everyone has finished. Just sitting at the dinner table involves stress. And noise and shouting (95% from the younger kid). Up until a few years ago I had a high stress job in my own business and my wife (and other's) worked for me. I feel like in that time in the past I neglected my wife as I was stressed out. At some point in time we seem to have become employer and employee rather than husband and wife. Although that was years ago now, I feel like the effects of that are still ongoing. We still work together. I've been suggesting my wife should go and get a job (so that she gets out of the house and sees something different) but she seems to have lost all self worth and has anxiety about leaving the house and whether she can perform the job. I'm trying to fix this but I can't. I love my wife but not sure if its reciprocal. Does she even love me or is she just exhausted from the kid. Why is everything wrong? Why is life like this? Why am I sitting here crying? What did I do to deserve this?

RedDragon Better of dead
  • replies: 1

Why do I feel I am better off grad I am forgotten by family I feel amine in relationship I am bullied at work my daughter is about to have a baby and I will only let her down by not being there for her. I can’t see with out my glasses, I have antidep... View more

Why do I feel I am better off grad I am forgotten by family I feel amine in relationship I am bullied at work my daughter is about to have a baby and I will only let her down by not being there for her. I can’t see with out my glasses, I have antidepressant and the local here think it’s bad but it keeps me alive

Guest_63420675 Self worth and imposter syndrome
  • replies: 1

How do you cultivate a sense of worthiness when everything valuable about you is taken away? I have put a lot of self worth in my work, which I enjoy and find meaningful, but after a very long specialisation process (2 university degrees and 10 years... View more

How do you cultivate a sense of worthiness when everything valuable about you is taken away? I have put a lot of self worth in my work, which I enjoy and find meaningful, but after a very long specialisation process (2 university degrees and 10 years of postgraduate training) I have almost completed my training but now find myself soon to be unemployed. Employers who I worked with while training and who encouraged me to apply with them when I had completed training have employed others instead. I have applied at other employers in several states and been unsuccessful so far. I will be unemployed in 3 weeks time. I don't have any hobbies as I had to give up many things for the demands of my work and training. I have to leave my rental shortly as it was sold, and don't feel I can take on a new lease without some kind of work that will enable me to pay rent. I am not close to my family (my parents consider me an embarassing disappointment for various reasons). I've moved too many times for work to keep many friends, I never had a lot of close friends anyway. A lot of my identity and meaning in life came from my job, which I have dedicated and sacrificed for, and now it feels like that industry is rejecting me without a second thought. A lot of online sources suggest spending time with friends (which I don't really have) or hobbies (which I don't have and can't afford as I'm about to be unemployed and need to save money however I can given the current cost of living). And I need to get rid of all of my stuff that won't fit in the car very soon anyway. I've always struggled with imposter syndrome but usually managed to put it back in its box, but events really seem to show me up as an imposter - otherwise surely someone would employ me. Not sure what to do next.

Guest_11304567 Child exploitation material
  • replies: 1

My son was charged with drug use and child exploitation material in 2023. He has served his sentence and was released Monday 29/12/25. I have supported him financially in prison and visited him. Much to the dismay of family members especially my daug... View more

My son was charged with drug use and child exploitation material in 2023. He has served his sentence and was released Monday 29/12/25. I have supported him financially in prison and visited him. Much to the dismay of family members especially my daughter. I completely understand why they are not happy as neither am I with what he has done, but I thought maybe supporting him would help. He’s now out and has accommodation for 3 months through accord west. He needs to work on his addiction and address the other charge. Does anyone know or can suggest boundaries I can put in place?

PastaTime Feeling like I'll never be good enough
  • replies: 1

I've been trying to get my life in order and do things that make me happy, but it just feels like I put in so much effort to get very little results. I want to make my art into a business but because of how I function with adhd and other commitments,... View more

I've been trying to get my life in order and do things that make me happy, but it just feels like I put in so much effort to get very little results. I want to make my art into a business but because of how I function with adhd and other commitments, it feels like I'll have to give up that career because I don't make much money from it and I don't have a large enough audience.But when I think of having to take on other work to survive, it just makes me depressed because I'm not good at anything else and the only work that pays well would make me unhappy. I feel stuck and that I'll never get achieve my goals and that I've wasted my whole life up to this point, it makes me wish I didn't have to live in this world because I'd be unhappy no matter what choice I have to make.I wish I was able to change, but after 30+ years change feel impossible at this point

Earth Girl What to do when people say things like this
  • replies: 5

My parents say really racist things. My Mum often says things like "Those Asian people" "A police officer was chasing an Asian man because... and then the Asian man..." "There's this Asian woman on this show who I don't really trust... I think it mig... View more

My parents say really racist things. My Mum often says things like "Those Asian people" "A police officer was chasing an Asian man because... and then the Asian man..." "There's this Asian woman on this show who I don't really trust... I think it might partly be because she is Asian" "I don't like saying certain sayings like you're welcome because it's very American" "I don't like annoying American accents." (She once also impersonated the way Asian people speak, and she was mumbling when she did it and not even saying any words). When I was little, since my parents kept talking about how evil Americans are, I thought they must have been really mean people. My Mum was reading us a picture book, and she said, "Typical Americans, they don't know how to draw." About 5 years ago I think it was, I asked her why she didn't like Americans and she said, "Because they think they are better than us!" I said most of them probably don't think that and she went "Oh yes they do!" She also says things like "There was a very nice black man at... today" and the other day she said, "Dad and I went for a walk, and there were two men there and one of them was black." When she finished the story, I asked what him being black had to do with anything and she said that she was just talking about his appearance (even though there was no need to). I mean, if I was asking what someone looked like because I was trying to find them then it would be okay to say, "They are tall, have dark skin, etc.", but she'll say that people are black or Asian when there's literally no need to. My Dad was watching a show and he said "Wow, she's dark haha." Why do they feel the need to say these things!? I've tried to explain to them that there's no need to say these things and that every culture has nice and not nice people in them and that I've known lots of really nice people who are Asian. But they just get annoyed with me and my Mum says "Fine, I just won't talk to you about this sort of thing then" and I said Well, I've told you before that I don't want to hear it! My Mum has also told me that she doesn't think that I should worry about being politically correct because it's a waste of time. I can't cut my parents out for many reasons, but even if I could, they would make me feel bad and say, "We may not be perfect." Everyone thinks they are so nice, but they have no idea how temperamental they are, and they act very differently outside than they often do inside the house.

Guest_21750272 Moving to a new place and regretting my life decisions
  • replies: 2

Don’t really know how to word this well but I’ve recently moved to a new place and I wish I could move back to what I am familiar with being closer to family. Also struggling with my past life decisions, financial and having no friends after moving. ... View more

Don’t really know how to word this well but I’ve recently moved to a new place and I wish I could move back to what I am familiar with being closer to family. Also struggling with my past life decisions, financial and having no friends after moving. I guess just wanting some advice and what others have done to help, just feels like nothings going right as I get older and I just feel stuck:(

Guest_35370081 Angered
  • replies: 1

My wife an i have been happily married for 18 yrs we have had the odd argument but nothing major recently i had a birthday which my wife threw a surprise party which i really enjoyed 2 days later idestroyed Xmas for my wife, we had a heated argument ... View more

My wife an i have been happily married for 18 yrs we have had the odd argument but nothing major recently i had a birthday which my wife threw a surprise party which i really enjoyed 2 days later idestroyed Xmas for my wife, we had a heated argument 2 days before Xmas, I lost my cool and pushed her not meaning harm, but she feel over, I accepted full blame and apologised profusely, she say she's fine and we're fine, but I know we're not the love has left her, I am afraid I have broken the one thing in this world that means anything to me. I am so ashamed and hate myself for what I have done to her, she won't talk about the future in depth. Is it over?

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