Hey Stef91,
Thanks for your post, it's nice to meet you here. I'm really saddened to hear that you have been struggling with depression and anxiety for some time and find it really challenging to get by financially as well.
I understand you're here to hopefully connect with people who have been through similar things, and I think one of the best suggestions I would make is to try and even connect with people on their threads. This one is always here for you, but other people's threads are also open for you to leave comments. I think a lot of people are in a similar situation where they just want to speak with someone who understands.
For me, I had similar experiences when I was suffering from depression and I think the struggle with motivation is part of that recovery and journey to overcome depression. It's tough, but it takes time for our minds and our habits to change. Fortunately, those changes are cyclical and they do make it easier in the long run. There'll always be setbacks, but with helpful habits and support, I found it easier to pick myself back up and start again further than where I'd began. Kind of a two steps forward, one step back mentality. The one step back sucks, but the bigger picture becomes clearer and more achievable over time.
I know that's not particularly helpful in the short term, but I hope it gives you a sense that you're not alone in this, and that bad days are temporary. On those days, I think it's okay to let ourselves be sad and not feel like we're going backwards, because depression and anxiety are just tough to deal with.
James
