It's that time of the month I'm in the middle if a particularly bad depressive episode. I find it really hard to shower or bathe a lot of the time. Sometimes it's due to lack of energy and sometimes I just physically cannot. Even if my parents run me a bath and all I have to do is get in. I sit by the bathtub and wonder why I can't just step into the goddamn tub. It's so frustrating and it makes me feel filthy. I do use baby wipes as often as I can but sometimes it goes on for so long that my hair starts to dry and break off. I'm going to talk about it with my psychologist tomorrow but sometimes the best advice comes firsthand. If anyone has anything that could be remotely helpful, please let me know.
I'm really glad to hear you feel more understood here. It was one of the things I found as well when I struggled with depression - speaking to people with their own lived experience with mental illness is so much more helpful and you often really feel properly heard for the first time.
I'm not sure what your parents' experience or knowledge of mental health is, but mine come from China and I think they grew with a very different way of thinking about mental health than I have. So I don't get any support from them and I've had to rely on my other friends and my psychologist. I basically avoid all conversation with them about that kind of thing as it has always made me feel a lot worse, but I'm also really careful to make sure that I have a good support network and good habits to make sure I stay well. It's been a while since I felt properly depressed, but at some point I just realised I had to cut my parents out of particular sections of my life because it was not good for anybody. I hope you don't have to do the same, but I think the same principle applies in terms of needing to put your mental health first.
I'm glad you've been able to trust your current psychologist enough to stay with her for two years. I'll let you in on a secret; I've been with mine, weekly, for the past... 6 or 7 years and I'm still not always fully open. I don't think that's a problem at all, but simply one to help you understand the limitations of that support, and perhaps something to discuss if you feel like you'd like to be able to be more open. I think each patient/doctor relationship is going to be a bit different, but the most important thing is that you feel supported by them.
Anyway, it was really nice to hear from you again. I am glad to hear you are still managing and getting by day by day. If you'd like to chat about anything, like anything about your difficulties with eating or whatever, please feel welcome to post whatever you'd like