A girl is bringing back my depression

[just_let_go]

Hi All, been a while.

A few months back I started on medication for my depression and anxiety and I had a great response to it. I went from being in a constant struggle every single day to feeling like my old self again just over a couple of months. I started seeing the light again and got over the issues that was troubling me horribly. I even started to get back into dating again...

And then I met her. This girl I knew through high school suddenly came into my life again. We met at a party, got talking, I got her number and we went out a week later. Everything went well. We went out a few more times, then more and more frequently. And then I realised that I had completely fallen for this girl. I cannot stop thinking about her. Every time she left my house I hated it. I just want to be with her all the time. So I did the only thing I could and I told her the way I felt. She said it's not a good time and she just wants to be friends. 

Okay that's her decision, fair enough, she did get out of a relationship about a month ago. But I'm still seeing her.  A lot. Like 3 - 4 times a week. She laughs at everything I say, we message each other constantly, she sends me flirty photos, whenever she comes over we end up cuddling on the couch. How is this what friends do? 

Bottom line is I just can't take it. My depression and anxiety have come right back because of this. The fact that she's become such a large part of my life yet she isn't my girlfriend is just killing me. She's hangs out with other guys sometimes too. That's when my anxiety and depression just goes insane. I guess i'm still hopeful that something might come out of this. Even her friends tell me that she likes me.

Everything was fine until she came into my life. Now the only time I feel good is when I'm with her or messaging her. Thanks for reading, I just really needed to vent this. 

Love hurts.

[Neil_1]

Ty

You received the message:   “I want you to talk to at least 3 girls tonight."

Now I don’t know what your family situation is, but would she think you came back with a funny response by saying something like:  “Well, I did as you asked.  I spoke to my Mum first, then I had a chat with one sister and then I phoned up another sister.  That all went well and I’m pleased I had that chat with them.”

Ok, that’s a bit silly, but it is Monday after all.

Neil

[just_let_go]

We were messaging throughout that entire night, until about 5am. She even asked me to meet her out in town where she was partying which I went to do but left it too late. Who knows what would have happened there. Just before I feel asleep she said, "Did you do what I asked?" I said "yeah" and she replied with, "See you'll have that girlfriend you want in no time."

 Yep. She's just got it all man. I think what makes it hard is that I'm SO picky with girls. Finally I find one and I just think I'll never find better. 

Hi Mares, no problem at all, appreciate you being here. 
Thank you. I am getting a lot of mixed signals from her. But I think you're right, she's probably protecting herself. I think you're right about not looking after myself as well. I keep staying up really late messaging her, and I'm a terrible sleeper. That has been contributing to my anxiety a lot. I think I've forgot about a lot of the steps I've had to put in place to manage my depression and anxiety, She is taking up a lot of my time. Thank you for all the great suggestions. I will definitely give them a try. 

Hi again Neil, haha, I probably should have said something like that. Or, "Well I talked to my mum before, my sister, and I'm already talking to you."