Struggling to cope with Eye Anxiety - why is it lasting so long?

[Eyeanxiety]

Hi everyone,

As you can see by the title of this thread, I'm suffering from health anxiety relating to my eyes/vision; I guess hypochondria. It's now nearing 5 months since I first started getting crippling anxiety and panic attacks, which stemmed from a stressful period in my life with my pet dog having a life threatening injury and almost passing, uni exams, and drinking a lot of caffeine. Anyway, it essentially came out of nowhere; I was studying and it's like my eyes became strained and started to get peripheral visual snow/haze I guess you can call it. I immediately booked an optometrist appointment, which unfortunately the earliest appointment was a couple days away which made it worse. Time came around and saw him, to which he scanned my eyes and checked my vision, and came to the conclusion that my eyes are healthy- yes it was a relief and I actually had little anxiety after the appointment and vision almost went back to normal. Few days later I started overthinking and didn't believe the optometrist and visual symptoms started to come back again leading me to see an ophthalmologist, which again, same results; healthy eyes and no sinister eye disease. I was good for a week or two after that and again same thing happened; my anxiety came back and as did my vision problems. Its been about 3 months since then and the last 1.5 months my anxiety has been constant, even a three week holiday in NZ with my supportive partner, I could not stop thinking about my vision and anxiety, even when having fun. I've now seen 2 GP's, 2 optometrists, 1 ophthalmologist, and a neurologist and have had 2 retinal eye scans, a OCT scan of the macular, visual field test, and a MRI of the head; all of these doctors and specialists and all the scans telling and showing me that there is nothing wrong with my eyes or brain. I have one of my regular appointments with my GP on the 13th of this month and will likely ask her for a referral to a neuro-ophthalmologist because I can't help it and can't wrap my head around why my vision seems like its closing in on me when I'm apparently completely fine? I've just started seeing a psychologist who is good for me and my gp recommends that I try anxiety medication, which I'm hoping will help achieve my goal of getting rid of this anxiety by the end of the year.

[Eyeanxiety]

And for clarity on my vision symptoms, I have what seems to be: patchy vision, tunnel like vision, floaters, hazy peripheral vision, unreal/surreal/dreamlike vision, and unfocused vision (when I look at something, everything else seems really unfocused). Any advice on how to cope, if anxiety can cause persistent issues relating to health (eyes for me), and what I should do?

[calmseeker]

Hi there Eyeanxiety,

So sorry to hear about your struggles with your vision and the intense anxiety surrounding it. I totally understand where you are coming from after similar visual disturbances myself. I spent a good year petrified that there was something sinister behind some very weird vision issues. I remember going to bed too scared to sleep thinking maybe I would just wake up blind, it got that bad. I also felt a little angry that GP was writing it off as anxiety, in my mind I just couldn't believe that anxiety could manifest in such a way.

I had many of the same tests as you have had (all the visual testing with ophthalmologist and optometrist and a brain MRI). The MRI did produce a finding which was hard for me to deal with but apparently nothing that would be affecting my vision. All vision testing came back perfect. So why was I having so many problems with my eyes?

I decided that I just had to believe the science from the experts and entertain the possibility that it indeed was anxiety. It helped that I had a lovely and understanding optometrist who took the time to be DEFINATE with me and it helped me so much. She said 'its definitely not coming from a problem in your brain, your eyes are sending messages to your brain perfectly fine. Its definitely not a problem with your vision, your vision is perfect'. I encourage you to trust in the science and accept the anxiety explanation, because when I did this my vision issues decreased and when I do get a bit blurry, have ridiculous amounts of floaters amongst other weird visual disturbances, I am now able to not react with quite so much anxiety.

I really feel for you Eyeanxiety, and I do know how awful this is. But my little humble opinion is that now your testing is showing as all clear, its time to embrace working on your anxiety management and I really believe that you'll have a decrease in your visual disturbances.

If you need to unload or vent your concerns please come back and chat if you want. This issue took me so long to get through and I still have pangs of doubt about it at times so I understand the need for reassurance.

My kindest thoughts

CS

[Eyeanxiety]

Hi Calmseeker,

Thankyou so much for taking time out of your day to reply, reading that has helped me significantly, and knowing I'm not alone makes things much better. May I ask what other visual disturbances you have had?

I think it is time for me to accept that it is anxiety, just like you, and move toward from there. I hope you're doing well and will get rid of what's left of the anxiety for you soon.

Once again, thankyou for your reply and have a good rest of the day:)

[calmseeker]

Hi again,

My visual disturbances included lots of floaters, black spots in vision, patchy vision, 'stains' in my vision, blurriness (usually in one eye at a time), halos around objects and at times my focus would skip around, I felt as is I couldn't focus on an object. I didn't have any of the peripheral issues like you have, nor the dreamlike vision you describe, but all your other symptoms I have definitely experienced.

My scariest symptom was when I would start to see a heat wave in my vison which turned into a kaleidoscope and then eventually I wouldn't be able to see out of one eye at all. This was sometimes followed by the inability to be able to string a sentence together. This whole episode only lasted for 20 - 30 minutes and would sometimes follow with a dull headache. One severe episode put me in ER and docs said I was experiencing 'ocular migraines without the headache'. ER docs said these ocular migraines and other vision issues could be a product of anxiety, since my tests were all clear.

I guess I felt I had no choice but to accept the anxiety diagnosis. I ended up thinking, well I can work on my anxiety issues and try to stop worrying about this weird vision thing now that my tests are clear, or I can live in fear and be extremely miserable and keep having test after test at the GPs office.

I know its really hard to take the focus off the symptoms, and it takes a while also. Since I have made a conscious effort to believe my eyes are ok and shift the focus onto managing my anxiety, I have definitely had fewer eye issues, and when I have, I have managed to not let it bother me as much (it feels like it took so long to get there so be patient and kind with yourself). Of course my pesky anxiety condition has latched onto other things now (isn't it great having anxiety - master one thing and then it presents us with another battle!) but I can go to sleep now without stressing about waking up blind.

I really hope you can get some relief form these symptoms. It can get quite terrifying and the anxiety can be isolating, I really understand this. My fingers are crossed tightly for you. Chat whenever you want.

Warmest wishes

CS

PS - I started taking some fish oil too as GP said it was good for brain and eyes and over all health. It cant hurt. The worst thing it could do is not work and then we just have really expensive pee 🙂

[Eyeanxiety]

So very similar to what I'm experiencing! How long did it last? Because for me it's been months on and off but now is pretty much every day.

I used to get ocular migraines and were temporarily blinded by them as well as a thumping migraine followed by nausea which yes, was very scary. As long as you don't get them anymore though, is what matters.

I need to try and accept that it is anxiety because indeed it is causing me to be miserable and scared, and see my gp a little too frequently.

Ignorance is bliss, anxiety-wise, it's going to be hard to ignore or divert attention from my the disturbances in my vision because I can't escape it, but I'll sure try! I'd hate for my anxiety to latch on to something else.

Thankyou once again, I appreciate the kind words and support:)

Why not, I'll give them a try!

[calmseeker]

My vision issues plagued me for at least a year. It started getting better when I started doing these things;

1. Accepted the testing was clear and the vision disturbances were anxiety related. (GP pointed out something helpful. He explained that stress causes high levels of adrenaline in the body which puts pressure on the eyes. Makes sense.)

2. Started seeing a psychologist to address the anxiety.

3. Began an online CBT course which has given me some tools to manage my anxiety (self paced and no cost)

4. Paid more attention to my general diet and sleep and also good hydration.

I am still on this journey and I have days were I feel myself getting anxious about my eyes again, and of course that makes the eyes worse as I am focusing on it again but I am able to pull myself back a bit better now and not entertain the thoughts so much. I notice you mention that these issues occur for you also after or alongside periods of stress.

I understand how you have been so anxious about this issue, who wouldn't be when experiencing such nasty symptoms, its truly scary! But you've done all the right things by getting the testing done. Maybe you should go ahead and get the referral that you mentioned, for the neuro-ophthalmologist if that helps you. It may assist you to tick off all the health concerns and begin the anxiety management.

Even amongst the stress of all of this, you strike me as a really positive person which will be a great attribute while trying to divert your attention from the eye anxiety. You mention you're seeing a psychologist which is awesome, as they will be able to assist you with some skills that help with health anxiety.

From one eye anxiety sufferer to another, I wish you a peaceful night with perfect vision!

CS 🙂

[Eyeanxiety]

Wow that's quite a long time.

Yes I've read up on how adrenaline does that- interesting how it has a role in that.

I've just started seeing a psychologist, I'm seeing her in a couple hours luckily. Can I ask the name of the CBT course?

I hope that I can soon control my anxiety like that. They happen at any time, though at their worst when I'm really anxious or just stressed; it's either bad or really bad.

I'll ask my gp for a referral on friday and hopefully will be the last appointment for my eyes.

I'm trying my best, I don't want to let the anxiety consume me!

Have a wonderful day, CS:)

[calmseeker]

Morning Eyeanxiety,

Google 'Mindspot Clinic' - then set up a secure account and do the online assessment. They can send a copy of this assessment to your GP and/or Psychiatrist if you want but you can choose not to if you wish. Then you can start the course. It takes about 10 weeks and you can spend as much or as little time as you want on it, there's no pressure. You have a therapist designated to you and they check in with you every couple of weeks (you can choose to have them check in with you entirely via email if you want or by phone). You can also call or email them with questions whenever you need. Its free of cost.

The course helped me to really understand what anxiety is and what is actually happening when panic sensations occur. Also, it gives some really good practical skills on what to do when you're overthinking or stressing. When I was chatting to you yesterday you mentioned you were concerned you would find it hard to divert your attention away from the eye worry - the course can assist you with ideas and skills to help you do this. Just logging into it and browsing can sometimes be enough to divert your attention away from the eye stress.

After doing this course, my advice to others starting it would be to be patient with yourself - be kind and gentle with yourself and don't expect the changes to occur overnight, it takes some time. You might be surprised and find relief from your symptoms occur quicker than mine did, or a little longer but hopefully not, we are all so different. I hope some relief comes really soon for you 🙂

Best of luck with the psych today. I hope its a helpful session. This pesky stage of your life wont last for ever - you got this!!

Kindest thoughts

CS 🙂

[Eyeanxiety]

Good afternoon Calmseeker,

Thanks for that, I'll get started on it tonight. Pretty cool how you get a therapist!

That's great to hear, I definitely need to find ways to distract myself and been wanting to find something like this for a while.

Oh definitely, progress doesn't come overnight, I'll give it my all.

Enjoy the rest of your day:)