Sister with severe anxiety, social phobia and OCD

[Kristy1234]

Hello,
I'm writing as a concerned family member for my sister who has had issues with anxiety, social phobia and OCD since she was a child, she's now 28 Mental illness has plagued our family for a very long time, and my parents seem to have given up on knowing what to do by this point as she refuses professional help. She has continued to deteriorate with her anxieties and compulsions to the point she barely ever leaves the house, she is consumed by obsessive rituals and this causes huge worry and concern for the family.

What I would really like is some advice and for anyone willing to share experiences of their own, regarding how to help a family member that is so trapped in their anxieties that they cannot help themselves to get professional help? When is the tough love approach needed? Does that approach work? Something needs to change as things are unfortunately not getting better and puts huge stress and burdon on my poor mother. Any thoughts and opinions on a very complex case would be much appreciated.
Thank you in advance
K

[Summer Rose]

Hi Kirsty1234

Welcome to bb. I'm so sorry that your sister is so unwell and that the entire family is struggling. Hugs to you.

My daughter also has anxiety and OCD. And she was also terribly unwell for a period of time when she was 13. Staying up all night to complete rituals and sleeping all day. Also unable to leave the house.

Thankfully, she was agreeable to receiving professional help. Fast forward 8 years and my daughter is managing her condition, attending university, working and in love. Life can get better.

Keep talking with your sister about the benefits of seeking help. Make sure she knows that OCD and anxiety are common, treatable conditions and that recovery is possible. Lots of love, support and reassurance, as your sister is no doubt sad, lost and scared.

It would be helpful if you could encourage your sister to take just one baby step to talk with her GP. You can ask the GP to come to your house for an assessment if your sister can't get out of the house. Perhaps you could offer to be present to provide support.

If that's too much, perhaps you could suggest your sister call the bb support line on 1300 22 4636.

I think it would be really helpful for you and/or mum and dad to also seek professional help.

Like your mum, I found it very difficult to cope with this illness. My GP referred me to a mental health nurse/family counsellor in private practise. Because she knew the illness, she helped me to understand what was really happening in various situations and coached me on how to effectively respond. She helped me stay strong, gain confidence and become really useful in the battle against OCD.

Eventually my husband and son also attended sessions with the counsellor. We all needed help and support because we all loved my daughter and her illness was tearing us apart.

I can't really comment on a "tough love" approach, mostly because I'm not sure what you mean by that. Do you want to share what you are thinking?

Kind thoughts to you