Preventing anxiety from taking over

[gloria10]

Hi

 I am currently seeking advice.  My anxiety has been getting stronger and I am aware that it is work related, I had a recent post about it.  I have a boss that yelled at me a couple of weeks ago and ever since then I'm finding it hard to face him as I'm worried that the same thing will occur.  

I have decided to leave and look for another job, but I don't want to make a rush decision and quit without income and I have done this in the past not only with work but relationships.  I think it has to do with fight or flight sensation and the flight wins.

Does anyone else deal with this? Is there any advice on how to control it? 

[blondguy]

Hey Gloria

I have made the same 'quick' decisions as well...I have had anxiety for a long time which has now gone..and depression has taken over.

Nobody likes getting yelled at...However with anxiety and/or depression that yelling can be magnified to more than your boss's inability to cope. For years I have detested anyone yelling at me and I probably took it personally.

I have to give you a compliment here though and I will quote you...."I don't want to make a rush decision and quit without income" You are spot on here Gloria. Your boss cant cope properly which means he has to resort to yelling at you...not good enough. If you enjoy your work....keep going with what you are doing...If you dont really enjoy what you are doing take your time and use your employer for a job while you look around for another...but keep in mind (as you know anyway) that the grass may not be greener on the other side of the fence.

I was also the same with my relationships Gloria....Like a knee jerk reaction...I understand fully where you are coming from.

Besides all the regular counseling methods and self help material/posts available I have always used one simple phrase;

'Haste Makes Waste'

I know its a bit too simple....but it does work....I wrote it in my dairy years ago so I could stop and think before I made the wrong decision. Even after I made a decision after weighing up the pro's and the con's I just stuck with it knowing I made the best decision I could at the time...and accepted the outcome...good or bad.

Humans are imperfect by nature.....Nobody can improve on that one.

Here for you 🙂

Kind Thoughts to You Gloria10

Paul

[gloria10]

Hi Paul,

Thank you for your kind words, they are very helpful. I am sorry to hear you have depression, I hope you're getting through it okay??

"Haste Makes Waste" definitely a phrase I'll have to keep in mind.  I broke up with someone suddenly years ago and it was because I didn't slow down and think about the right way to approach it.  I still think I made the right decision, but perhaps it would have been wiser when I had more support around.

I was happy today though as I was able to push past the anxiety and go to work, which I've never been able to do before.  I think I need to look for another job with a bit more security and similar hours, that way I can get into a routine.  If I can hold out for a while I'll know I've tried my hardest 🙂

Gloria10

[Dozza]

Hi Gloria 10 I have had a very similar situation as you are in now. Have you tried to explain your feelings to your boss and also is there a hr person or union person you can talk to.  I left my job and I regret it now I wish I had fought harder for my rights. If I had my time again I would have gone to hr or even higher because these bullies should not be allowed to get away with this. My thoughts are with you and good luck. 

[blondguy]

Hey Gloria

Thanks for your reply, the depression does come and go but I dont miss the anxiety thats for sure 🙂

Well done for 'accepting' the anxiety today and get to work! You are strong. You are also pro-active in your thinking Gloria.You have done very well.

Kind Thoughts

Paul