Please help

[M_e_k_s]

Hi guys,

im currently experiencing a lot of anxiety and depression throughout these summer holidays. Most of it I believe stems from my OCD for things to be clean, and kthers disagreeing leading to arguments with my siblings and my mum and dad generally supporting them isolating me and making me feel like everything is against me. But a majority of if is really due to the fact that I have expressed many times to my mum how I am not doing to well mentally, which I thought I was really strong for doing and actually quite proud. The problem is that my mum really doesn’t acknowledge my mental issues. She doesn’t believe that I have depression or mild to severe anxiety, despite it running heavily in her family and affecting her greatly through depression and bipolar disorder. My mental state is causing me to withdrawal partially and become quite ‘rude’ or demanding (to clean and organise) which my mum tends to bring up when I’m upset and tell her about my issues. I feel like she doesn’t want to believe me and doesn’t care or love me. For example, when saying goodnight to be 2 brothers, she says ‘goodnight darling’ without saying anything to me and she always responds to me in a flat tone. As someone with anxiety this really gets to me and I notice it more than I should. I should mention she is not a bad mother, but only fails to acknowledge my deteriorating mental state and get me help. Do you know why? Is it because she herself is suffering ? I personally always try to cheer her up when she is sad, ensure she has her medication, just so she may potentially do the same for me, but I’m just left dissapointed.

Thanks for reading.

[blondguy]

Hi M.e.k.s

Welcome and its great to have you as part of the forum family too!

I understand you as I used to have chronic anxiety for a long time and to have someone say goodnight darling to my siblings would hurt if I had a flat response back. Your reaction is more than understandable Meks.

You mentioned that your mum had a history where depression/anxiety was concerned. That is interesting as she probably cares so much for you that she is hesitant in 'talking' about anxiety or depression? Just a thought as I have the same for years yet I cant explain why your mum doesnt empathise with your health condition.yet

Can I ask if you have seen your GP and been diagnosed with anxiety/depression? Please excuse me for the silly question.....yet its important so we can provide better support for you 🙂

Just a note...The forums are a very Safe and Non Judgemental place for you to post M.e.k.s.
Your privacy and well being are paramount to us

I really hope you can post back....only when its convenient for you..

my very best

Paul

[MsPurple]

Hi M.e.k.s

and welcome to the forums:) I myself have anxiety and depression and I completely get what you mean about the whole feeling like your parents don't love you as much my siblings. I think my anxiety at the time just made it seem 100 x worse. When I was older I was able to see that my anxiety exadurated things, however at the time it felt terrible. And it does feel terrible. Have you ever discussed these feelings with your mum? Have you told her how you would like to be called affectionate names like 'darling' to? I had a conversation about this with my dad when I was young. I pointed it out that he would like my sister do things and not me and how it wasn't fair. He I told him an example and it was like his rose coloured glasses were taken off and he worked hard to make sure we were given the same level of attention and affection. It was a hard conversation to have but it was helpful

Might I ask how old you are? I am asking because there is a youth mental health service called headspace. They have various centres across Australia as well as an online service. Us forum users are awesome. It is a great safe space. However we are just like you. We are not professionals and we can only come on the forums when we can. Headspace have an online chat service if you need to talk to someone without a delay. I have been to their centres to see psychologists and a psychiatrist with them and it was really helpful. Now you don't have to go to headspace to get help. I saw my gp and got a referral to a great psychologist. I found it helpful to talk about how I feel and to deal with my anxiety

I hope this was helpful. I am an open book 🙂