Please help, I have OCD and don’t know exactly what’s happening

[MrAnxiety]

Hi all, I have just joined as a member recently, I feel the need to say what is going on with me as I am not fully cognizant as to what is happening. I sometimes get racing thoughts throught my mind and it’s difficult for them to stop, this can happen at anytime and sometimes when I am watching TV or listening to the radio, the thoughts can begin and seem to distract me from what I am listening to/watching and I tend to tune out unwillingly as the thoughts seem to just take over, I feel as if I barely have any control or any way to make them stop.


The thoughts can start at any random time and sometimes consist of events that have happened in the past or conversations I have had in the past or a future conversation I am planning to have.


It also happens if I may be about to see someone, eg, on the way to work and I feel that they may ask me a question and I am thinking what the question may be and I plan my potential responses in my mind, it’s kind of like a version of how the conversation could go is going through my head.


There are times where I will also start thinking that my boss is going to call me and either cancel a shift on me or tell me off for something that I may have done wrong, I understand that this falls under the category of timorousness as I work a range of different hours and rarely see my boss and therefore cannot know if she is happy with my performance etc at times, this is usually only ephemeral and passes once I know she has left work for the day.


I feel that a lot of this is due to my OCD, I sometimes get random feelings in my body like kind of like some kind of stabbing pain in my chest and it’s kind of like a semi hot feeling, it doesn’t really last that long but I often get scared when it occurs and think I may be having a heart attack or stroke, I try to convince myself that this is not the case but it’s not that easy to do, it scares me that it may happen in future, this event just happened to me last Sunday in the movie theatre and eventually passed, I attempt to manage it with a breathing technique that I was taught and it works quite a bit, the movie started and it eventually went.


I’m putting my story on here as I want to know if others are experiencing something similar or have in the past, it would be greatly appreciated if people could answer and attempt to assist in any way or at least share similar experiences. Thanks in advance.

[Bethie]

Hi

Yep i can relate to most of that. Projecting is the worst of my anxiety and depression triggers. That hot feeling is so not fun. Even trying to find a aircon to stand in front of sometimes does not work.

It would be a good idea to go talk to your GP and tell them what your going through.

Good luck and please let us know how your going on both good and bad days

[MrAnxiety]

Okay thanks, feels good to at least know there are others out there experiencing what I am, yeah not fun at all, yeah it can become really hot that feeling, I have been to my GP and had counseling in the past, what I was taught has helped a bit but not for the voices aspect, I have a lot on my plate atm which is making it difficult to find the time to see GP and am trying my absolute best to manage it for now, I should really do it though, thanks, that was really nice that you asked me to keep you updated, you too, what exactly triggers it for you? For me it’s work pressure, money and doubts over my future, I think talking about it will be good and possibly help us both.

[Bethie]

Hi

Mine tend to be i think others expect a higher standard from me and will be upset if i don't achieve it. My head tells me i should be able to do everything without asking for help. Simple things like going into a new shopping centre and trying to find my way around can start the stress and panic but me no i dont do logical mostly. I wait till I'm all worked up before either leaving or looking at the information board. It's only the small things. Big life stuff is as easy as breathing. I work when i want and am anal with time management so you could say I'm a control freak. My husband and son are used to it because most of my family is the same. Over achieves with more letters after their names than in them. Only problem is the constant bouts of stress and breakdowns. I programme everything into my phone to keep me focused now, even down to simple things like toilet finders and where i park my car

[MrAnxiety]

Yes I get that, I sometimes feel pressure of what others expect of me too, yes I see how getting lost could cause panic etc, especially if you are unfamiliar with your sorroundings, they are small things like you said, kind of like me most seem to be small things or it can even begin at random.

I’m very hot on time deadlines in management even if only short term deadlines, I’m really organized cause of my OCD I feel, I’m always setting reminders and alarms as I don’t like to leave anything to chance and eliminate even the most modicum chance that I will forget something important related to work etc.

I also do that with my car, I tend to write down the level or the exact space I/we have parked in.

[geoff]

hi Mr. Anxiety, you are not alone when you have these feelings or thoughts and it is probably your OCD causing this, and it does happen with me even though I've had OCD for 58 years, if you can relate to someone who has OCD and thinks that they need to check the door lock believing that it's not locked, exactly the same happens with someone who has these worries/thoughts. Geoff.

[MrAnxiety]

Hi Geoff, thanks for answering my message, I do the same thing with the house door and my car door quite often, especially my car door and am always thinking my electronic rolla door may not have closed, I sometimes have to sort of picture it when I pressed the button and see it going down in my mind to confirm with myself that it’s done. I have many other little OCD related habits I guess you call them, may I ask how you manage yours or attempt to lesson the impact on life etc? Thanks 🙂

[geoff]

hi MrAnxiety, I haven't forgotten about you or your post, it's only because I start very early in the morning 2 to 2.30 am and I seem to get immersed in 'new posts' that come in so I am very happy to hear back from you.

I have written down your avatar and will definitely reply back tomorrow, in the meantime I hope someone else who has OCD can join in, because you have asked a very complex question, but please check your post tomorrow. Geoff.

[MrAnxiety]

Thanks buddy, it’s all good, I get very busy with work too at times, wow that’s nice of you man, take your time though if you are busy buddy, yeah would be good if more happen to see my post and get involved.

[geoff]

hi MrAnxiety, people who have OCD have compulsions/rituals and habits and hope that by doing them will prevent something bad from happening, once that feeling starts it becomes a necessity and if you are susceptible to OCD then that's how it develops.

Some people don't have this necessity after awhile, so the compulsion doesn't form, but for those of us who it, it can be a nightmare, but we do it to relieve our anxiety and that 'certain something' from happening.

If circumstances change for you, such as changing house, job or r/ship then the habits you did while being in any of these will stop and replaced by something else.

As a kid I couldn't step on any joins on the concrete when walking anywhere, now because I've changed residence twice it doesn't bother me any more.

I'm also spot on for appointments and get there 10 mins before hand and this relates to you being organised, the same as I am. Geoff.