Not looking forward to anything

[Booklover17]

Hi everyone,

I just wondered if anyone is in this situation or has been in the past? I have had a tough couple of weeks and now I am in the mindset of being down all the time, not looking forward to anything and not wanting to speak to anyone. I do see a psychologist, I do get anxiety and depression. I would just love to hear from someone who has been through it, who understands.

Thank you

[Doolhof]

Hi Booklover17,

I am sure there are many people here who can relate to what you have written.

Only on Saturday I was in a dreadful state, I am very surprised my husband did not toss me out of the house! Instead he was kind enough to make me a cup of tea and put on a movie for me to watch so I was able to calm down a little and find a bit of perspective.

It helped a little. I must say I was still in a dreadful state for most of the day.

I'd like to encourage you to read a post by Jessicaloveslife22 called "What's the worst that can happen" in the Staying Well section.

I agree with you, it can be very hard to push through those depressive and anxious thoughts, as Jessica has mentioned doing so can be so beneficial even if it takes a lot of effort!

Please know you are welcome to share more here if you want to. Many people here I am sure understand what you are experiencing.

Cheers to you from Dools

[White_Rose]

Hello Booklover

Good to hear from you again although sad you are in this pickle.

As Dools has said, there are many people who have gone through a similar situation as yours and can talk about how they coped. When we need to do our best at a particular time we can usually rise to the occasion and stick with it. When it's all over the body breathes a sigh of relief and switches off the adrenalin we have used to get us through. Invariably this makes us feel tired/cranky/wanting solitude and all the things you are experiencing. Unfortunately it does take a while to get back up again.

Instead of trying to be a super hero we need to acknowledge the turmoil we have struggled under and give ourselves permission to rest and recover. It sounds simple I know but not as easy to put into practice. We are so programmed to keep going that stopping for more than day makes us feel guilty. Does any of this resonate with you?

It's gets more difficult when we are struggling with depression etc as we are fighting on two fronts. And of course the black dog whispers in the ear that you will never be useful or that you are lazy. Not true of course. It is hard to ignore the dog and focus on your own needs. In the thread Dools mentioned Jessica has her own mechanisms to keep going and it's great. We all need to find what helps us most.

Apart from the depression we need to listen to our bodies. When we have been running around the body does run out of fuel which is at least part of your difficulty in getting going again. Nourish yourself as well as you can. Diet plays a huge part in all this so make sure you eat as healthily as possible. It's amazing how much difference this makes. I have been struggling with some unpleasant news and all the repercussions it entails. In my usual way I eat what easy and fast, not a balanced diet by any means. Now I am paying attention to my food and making an effort to eat well. The difference is amazing.

If you can get yourself out of the house try going for a walk. Again there is a strong link between exercise and good mental health. My GP used to say that to me all the time but it wasn't until I actually did some exercise that I realised how much difference it made. To use Jessica's phrase, "What's the worst that can happen?"

Keep talking to us.

Mary

[Booklover17]

Hi Dools,

Thank you for your reply. That’s a great husband right there 🙂 It’s so hard once in a state to get out of it. I will check out that post, thank you 🙂

[Booklover17]

Hi Mary,

Thank you for your reply and for explaining this to me so well. When you said you just keep going - this is me exactly. I guess it has caught up with me now. It is so hard to ignore the dog! I will try to work on my diet, but I am not much of an eater really- I eat enough but it’s just hard to get excited about food and to change my diet is therefore hard.

I do try to exercise regularly - I dance and do yoga which is helpful.

[White_Rose]

Hello Booklover

Glad to know you are already getting exercise. It doesn't have to be much. Dance and yoga sound fine. I know what you mean about eating. I put on an enormous amount of weight because I ate what was quick and easy, usually my comfort food. It does take an effort to prepare a healthy meal. I'm not really interested in cooking etc these days and I know I need to eat properly. Not a huge amount as food has gone off my priority list, but the right stuff. And I dislike salads.

Have a look at some other threads in the Anxiety forum and reply to those you can. It's surprising how much you learn about yourself doing this and sharing tips is very helpful.

Mary

[Doolhof]

Hi Booklover,

I'd like to encourage you to take one day at a time.

There are some days that seem to absolutely horrible and we just don't know what to do with ourselves. Even at the end of those kind of days I try to find something to be thankful for.

Other days are not so tough. Those are days when you might be surprised to find yourself laughing and forgetting about your depression for a while.

I sometimes watch funny animal clips on the computer so I do have something to smile about.

My husband, yer, he loves me in his own way and I guess that is all that matters hey!

Cheers to you from Dools

[Booklover17]

Hi Mary,

Thank you for your reply. I also dislike salads and people look at me like I’m crazy when I say that! Lol. I am glad someone shares my dislike! Good idea, I will take a look at the other posts.

[Booklover17]

Hi Dools,

Thank you for your kind words. I will try to take one day at a time. It’s just hard when a day is just so awful you don’t know what to do anymore. I like those clips too.