Nervous Voice

[mathsgod]

hi,

when I speak to people (close family and work colleagues), i suffer from what i call 'nervous voice'. this manifests itself as an inability to say 'hello' or 'how are you' and a broken nervous initial conversation. sometimes it settles down but as i get older, 63, it seems to be getting worse. surprisingly, i get it when speaking to my loved ones! i can't say, 'i hope you have a nice day at school' (example only).

i have had it all my life to some extent but i am only just looking at treatments!

i am on an SSRI. i wondered if anyone else suffers from this and whether an SSRI has helped?

i have only been on a small dose 4 weeks and moved up yesterday.

thanks.

[mathsgod]

i should say, i am also talking to a psychologist but it is slow going. it has its roots in a fear of confrontation.

[randomxx]

Hi there op and yeah, l suffered from v similar, l'm almost 60ish now.

My mum hinted once that it was a shyness thing for me but l'd never considered myself shy bc l could often be pretty wild to if anything on the other hand. But actually, later on in life l realized she was probably right but it's just that with me it came in waves so in low waves l could be actually fairly shy ad get lost for words or a come back. l never admitted that to anyone but l did start to realize it and that so many people things in life were about personality and that some were just as bold as brass, simple as that. They had no fear no conscience no care , almost narcissistic in a weird way.  Others on the other hand like me did have our days but we were also the more sensitive type that did care did see things were aware of things and of people and usually had a far more gentler empathic side to us on the off days.

l have a lot of brothers and even in family there were 2 brothers that l'd just cave on all the time, and they knew it too. lt wasn't until one day l thought right, just not on and especially with those two l have to stay strong, don't let them see it, l also knew that'd be v good practice for life in general situations to and so l figured l'd start there.

Well , that was 25yrs ago or so and things changed drastically with those two from there, l'd forced myself to stand firm no matter what. Don't cave no stuttering, no signs, keep my tones natural and l took that from there and off into life to and started practicing .

l remember those brothers testing me later on but holding firm they eventually realized that old me was gone. Even though to this day it still isn't actually buttttt , my secret. l realized the main thing was to just keep your tone sound the same don't appear weakened type thing.

Well, from there l used the same through life to and things improved greatly from there , even though to this day it is still half bluff half fake bravado, it's done the job none the less and changed my life. Soooo, that's how l cured it, persevering l guess.

All the best

rx

[randomxx]

Ps, l also found out later on, 40s, that l was dyslexic and with that you also kind of get this mental block type thing. So all that added up too. But with people things l just kind of put my foot down on myself and tried not to let any of that in. Over time it became easier and easier.

[mathsgod]

Thank you very much for your story.

d.