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Anxiety

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Chris_B Forums etiquette: give support to receive support
  • replies: 0

Hi everyone, particularly any new members who may be reading. From time to time, we get contacted by members who are unhappy that they haven’t received a lot of replies to their posts. Our community champions work very hard to make sure that all newb... View more

Hi everyone, particularly any new members who may be reading. From time to time, we get contacted by members who are unhappy that they haven’t received a lot of replies to their posts. Our community champions work very hard to make sure that all newbies are welcomed when they first post, and we understand that it’s a big step to post for the first time on a forum like this, especially if you aren’t feeling great. It’s important to remember, though, that these forums are a community of real people, just like you, not a one-on-one support environment like going to see your psychologist. To get the best out of being here, one of the best tips we can offer is give support to receive support. Being a good community member means: participating in different threads (not just your own), replying to people who have taken the time to reply to you (even if it’s just to say thank you), and... posting words of emotional support and encouragement when you see others who are hurting and reaching out. You don’t have to feel obliged to solve the problems of others: that’s not what we’re here for. But you can offer empathy and what you’ve learned from your own life experiences, even if it’s just a line or two, eg. “I don't know what to say, but I want to give you my support and tell you I care about what is happening to you and hope life will get better soon.” Try to develop an interest in the journeys of others here on the forums. You may be surprised at how good being an active, caring member here can make you feel. For those of you who have had good experiences giving support here on the forums, please post in this thread here and let us know how it has helped you on your journey.

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lincolnh I feel like I’m sleep walking through life
  • replies: 5

AIA if this story doesn’t make much sense, I’m not great at communicating how I’m feeling. I’m a 24 year old male with a decent paying corporate job, but my life consists of nothing but feelings of emptiness. I have faced social anxiety, general anxi... View more

AIA if this story doesn’t make much sense, I’m not great at communicating how I’m feeling. I’m a 24 year old male with a decent paying corporate job, but my life consists of nothing but feelings of emptiness. I have faced social anxiety, general anxiety, depression etc since I was about 16 which I’ve come to accept over the years. I’ve never really been a social person, I love having friends, however I’ve never liked making friends. My only 2 friends(who I’ve known since school) I’ve started to grow apart from over the past couple of months. One of them has stopped talking in our group chat and has started hanging out with work colleagues a lot more. I’ve let a lot of friendships die over the years because I’ve always had these 2 who I’ve done everything with. If I lose my friendship with them, I’ll literally have no one. I have no ability to make friends either at work or outside of work. My mother always asks me why I don’t do anything on weekends and why I never go out and do anything, and I always say that my other 2 mates are busy. It’s because I have no social circle. I feel like life is about experiences rather than money making, and i feel like I have no one to share my life with due to my incompetence at making friends. I always feel like a total loser because while other people are out their making memories, I’m stuck with my own company. I know I can’t keep living like this.

Brokenhearted Where to start on a journey to healing?
  • replies: 4

Background info - I have pretty severe GAD. I didn’t realize just how bad, or how much it has affected every aspect of my life, until my beloved (ex)husband of over 20 years had a breakdown of his own because he was so unhappy. He left in January, an... View more

Background info - I have pretty severe GAD. I didn’t realize just how bad, or how much it has affected every aspect of my life, until my beloved (ex)husband of over 20 years had a breakdown of his own because he was so unhappy. He left in January, and I only recently found out he’s been seeing someone since March. Apparently he was too scared to tell me as he was worried I would completely fall apart. Which I am. The only thing getting me through was the hope it was temporary, and we could reconcile.So this is where I am now. Completely unravelling with anxiety off the charts.Add in some panic disorder, social anxiety and a touch a ocd, being in my head is not fun. I have to somehow navigate my way through a life without him. All the ways he covered for me the past 20 years. Making the phone calls, paying the bills. These things terrify me.We have to sell the house and there will be all the things I need to do without his guidance.I am 52 and never lived without another adult. Now it’s just me, my youngest kid and a dog.I have been on meds for the past 4 years, but I don’t know if they’ve actually helped at all. I just assumed they were, so I’ve made an appointment with my GP to review. I have been seeing a psychologist on and off this year, but it’s just talk therapy, and I don’t think talking for 50 minutes a fortnight is going to fix me. So what do I do? I need to get well enough to re-enter the workforce. I haven’t had a proper job for 10 years.I am so overwhelmed. Do I look at inpatient programs? What is likely to help me?

Amaree15 Infidelity- how to cope
  • replies: 6

Today I've just found out my partner of 5 years has sought s3xual relief from an escort by form of erotic massage.I have so many mixed feelings and am struggling to process the why.He tells me he loves me.. how can someone say that but do what they'v... View more

Today I've just found out my partner of 5 years has sought s3xual relief from an escort by form of erotic massage.I have so many mixed feelings and am struggling to process the why.He tells me he loves me.. how can someone say that but do what they've done.I feel ashamed, embarrassed, that I've done something to make him do it, why am I not good enough. I can't stop the tears, I feel physically Ill, I am already struggling with mild depression and now I have to deal with this.Where do I start, what do I do?

Angle Anxiety
  • replies: 8

Hi my names angel I have alot of anxiety and the reason I'm bringing this up because it has affected my life mentally and physically I have asked for help I have talked to teachers in my school we have a well being and j have a well being pass but mo... View more

Hi my names angel I have alot of anxiety and the reason I'm bringing this up because it has affected my life mentally and physically I have asked for help I have talked to teachers in my school we have a well being and j have a well being pass but most of my teachers tell me to stay in the classroom what do I do

Guest_25939418 Nausea & anxiety
  • replies: 2

Does anyone else out there suffer from nausea and anxiety together?I get overwhelmed with nausea and that leads to anxiety

Does anyone else out there suffer from nausea and anxiety together?I get overwhelmed with nausea and that leads to anxiety

tina House mate and Landlord exteamly bad drama
  • replies: 1

Hi my name's Tina I am stuck in a horrible Share house due to Rental crisis.My Landlord is extremely rud,Sexuast and ignores women.also one of my House mate he is very very loud between 9pmand 3am I am really struggling with this.I have tried mention... View more

Hi my name's Tina I am stuck in a horrible Share house due to Rental crisis.My Landlord is extremely rud,Sexuast and ignores women.also one of my House mate he is very very loud between 9pmand 3am I am really struggling with this.I have tried mentioning to close the kitchen door because of noise he seems to ignore me.i have lost alot of sleep due to this he also bangs to the walli share

MoodedOut Letting others down
  • replies: 1

Just wanted to share something, I had a pretty horrible anxiety attack today. I wanted to try out a new food place and I took my parents along, but it didn't seem like they really enjoyed it. Now I just feel really selfish for making others try somet... View more

Just wanted to share something, I had a pretty horrible anxiety attack today. I wanted to try out a new food place and I took my parents along, but it didn't seem like they really enjoyed it. Now I just feel really selfish for making others try something that only I want to. I feel like I should have taken them to a place they were used to. I know my parents still emjoyed going out and going there and part of this is my anxiety but it's always hard to go through these kind of things for me

Sal2645 Anxiety driving friends away
  • replies: 2

Hi everyone. I’m writing because I’m struggling a lot at the moment with my friendships. I’ve always put a lot of pressure on myself to behave a certain way so that people will like me because I often get stuck in thought patterns that I’m inherently... View more

Hi everyone. I’m writing because I’m struggling a lot at the moment with my friendships. I’ve always put a lot of pressure on myself to behave a certain way so that people will like me because I often get stuck in thought patterns that I’m inherently unlikeable and no one wants to be around me so I really have to make an effort to be tolerable to be around. This is something I’ve dealt with my whole life so it’s nothing new and I know I’m just overthinking. But lately my friends have been doing things without me and not inviting places which just is my worst fear and means that my overthinking has become a reality. Its my fault because I’m constantly worried about how I’m acting and assume that no one wants to talk to me so I rarely reach out to people first. I’m always over analysing everything I do and people’s reactions so I’m probably not that present in the moment and look like I’m not enjoying myself. This means that because I’m worried about bringing the mood down and being boring, that I actually am ruining the mood because I just don’t engage. Obviously this would drive my friends away and it’s just hard because it solidifies the fact that I think I’m insufferable to be around because now im not apart of anything anymore.Before I could kinda pretend to be normal but now because I’m getting invited less and less, there is more pressure in my head when I’m with my friends because I’m trying to make them like me again, but obviously that just makes it worse cause I’m more anxious than normal. I just feel like I’ve done this to myself and have no idea how to fix it.

bellyk8 Debilitating social anxiety
  • replies: 10

I'm reaching out because i want to know if there's anyone that shares my level of social anxiety (to the point that it interferes with everyday life and has for years). I find it difficult to maintain eye contact with people that are talking to me, t... View more

I'm reaching out because i want to know if there's anyone that shares my level of social anxiety (to the point that it interferes with everyday life and has for years). I find it difficult to maintain eye contact with people that are talking to me, to the extent that i cannot fully focus on what they're saying to me because i'm so anxious + heavily focused on maintaining eye contact with them. I avoid social events at all cost (which means that i don't have much of a social life but i am introverted so that doesn't bother me heaps), if i have to go to them (family or work related event) i will dread it for days ahead of the event, if there is alcohol involved i use that as a bandaid effect to ease the severe discomfort i experience. If i find myself in a group setting with people or even going to the shops and see someone i know i will enter fight or flight mode and shut down mentally/physically, like i can't even function properly. There is so much more i can say but basically i am sick of feeling like i have to hide all the time and be severely distressed by things that any normal person would not be in their everyday life, and i shouldn't be in fight/flight mode over. I feel isolated at work because i don't actively engage with my coworkers (unless it is a work related question) to avoid the anxiety that comes with making small talk or banter (i'll avoid the lunch room and go out for a walk at lunch). I also used to wear sunglasses when working in an outdoor job often to avoid direct eye contact which made me feel much more at ease. I know all these coping mechanisms are not healthy, but i have been like this for years. I don't know what triggered the social anxiety, i was a shy person in school and only stuck to one or two friends, never groups of people. I understand that exposure therapy seems to be the only way out of SAD (i am medicated for anxiety however it doesn't seem to have an effect on my SAD), but i feel like at my age (33), being in the workforce and having a partner etc, it should have dissipated? I know rationally that there is nothing to fear from people talking to me but i can't help it. I should also note that my partner is pretty much the only person that i don't struggle / think about eye maintaining contact with. One psychologist asked if i thought i might be autistic, but i am fairly sure it is social anxiety. If anyone out there is going through the same thing please know you're not alone.

grovi I had a car accident
  • replies: 4

And it was entirely my own fault. I tried crossing two lanes of traffic on a street that I've done it a million times before. It was really busy and a guy opened up a gap for me. I was so focussed on missing an accident in those later lanes that i fo... View more

And it was entirely my own fault. I tried crossing two lanes of traffic on a street that I've done it a million times before. It was really busy and a guy opened up a gap for me. I was so focussed on missing an accident in those later lanes that i forgot for an instant to double check the closest ones which seemed completely clear. Noone was hurt, and there was only really minor damage to the cars. I just didn't see him. The insurance has accepted all claims but I'm still so wrecked with guilt over the situation. I'm so ashamed that I can't bring myself to tell anyone. I'm so scared to get back in the car because I'm paranoid that I'll miss something somehow. And I'm so scared that this is going to become one of those things that just stays with me for years and years to come. I have had major issues with guilt / shame anxiety in the past. It's partially the lack of personal concequence that's really messing with me. Everything ended so neatly and almost too well. I am thankful for this but at the same time I feel as though I should have been fined, punished somehow. On the one hand I feel as though I deserve to have this anxiety, but I don't know how to stop feeling this way, and I really don't think I can handle dwelling on this kind of shame again for as long as I did last time.