and I don't know why.
I went from making 6 figures pre covid to working during covid, burnt out very badly, quit in a wave of utter panicked terrible decision making (I thought it was logical and ok at the time) reset, reboot, get back in the field, get another job... not as much but this was the plan. Bam, I leave because "the boss asked too many questions". I got fired from two more jobs for being weird, sending weird emails, suspecting weird things.
I know the job, I did it for a long time pre covid. I cannot take any interaction without thinking its against me, even the 'possibility' and anticipation of someones interaction with me being negative creates the most insane brain breaking flight response I have taken to driving down the highway erratically making loud money guttural hoots of utter anguish.....
The worst part though, is when my wife finds out I left ANOTHER job, and my only reaction can possibly be flee in shrieking terror and fantasize about going bush in a daze for 12 hours, snap back to reality, go back and look at her face when she sees if ill actually return this time, have a talk and go on with our lives knowing we will be back here in 8 months, or 2 weeks etc etc....
