So I have obsessive compulsive anxiety but at the time I was diagnosed they said I was a mild case and there was not much I could do unless I wanted to take medication to which I refused. Fair enough, but since then I feel like my brain is forcing itself deeper into the whirlpool of anxiety. I'm scared of my brain, it's so volatile.I feel like we are two different people to the point where It will argue with me or talk to me out of the blue , I feel like I have to force myself to function properly 24/7 and it's exhausting. My brain constantly has intrusive thoughts and tells me things like "you are going to be sick (I am terrified of vomiting of late) so just do it now do it now. The smallest things can tip my mental health over for months and months. Whenever I'm alone in my thoughts I am constantly plagued by unpleasant things and fear. I'm sleep deprived and I'm scared of how far this will go.
i can gain any number of phobias in a day just by thinking about it, my mind will constantly obsess about "new found phobias" and I feel out of control. I don't want this to get worse I'm terrified about the power that my brain has. I feel like I would feel much better if someone could just tell me that this will be over, I want to feel like I can win this battle, if anyone has any stories to share I would really appreciate it thankyou 🙂
