How do I make people understand my anxiety?

[bydde1607]

Hi all,

I'm new to this site, and I just need some advice from people who have anxiety and understand what it is like to live with it.

Since I was a teenager I have been struggling with anxiety and it has taken me years to figure out what I suffered from and why. I think alot of it is underlying issues from my dad never being there for me growing up. I still think about it all of the time, I feel like I've done something wrong for him to behave the way he does, even though I understand that it's not my fault but his.. I keep thinking everyone else is going to do the same thing and just abandon me like he has, so I find it hard to trust people.

I also worry and overthink literally everything. I don't know how to stop, I'm just caught in a bad way of thinking and struggle to get out of these unhealthy thinking habits. People always come to me for advice and support and it’s so draining when I don’t receive the same back from them. Basically it's starting to get the best of me... I feel like I'm carrying around all of these thoughts and feelings and I don't know how to let it all out. I understand that I have to talk to somebody (a professional) about it but as a student I struggle to find the money for it... I feel like I can't talk to my friends and family about it because they don't understand what it's like to feel like this. I don't want to be a burden on them, which I constantly feel like I am if I talk about things. I just feel so alone in this, when is it going to be enough? How do you explain to someone who doesn't understand anxiety what it's like? I struggle to even get out of bed some days because my feelings are so overwhelming and it's just so hard. What can I do?

x

[Birdy77]

Hi bydde 😊

It's great you've reached out here.

Lots of us here understand what it is like to have anxiety, so you've come to a good place.

You said you know you should see a professional to talk, but that as a student you can't afford it. Did you know that you can get up to 10 visits to a psychologist through a GP referral and Medicare? Some psychologists bulk bill so it costs you zero dollars.

Something to think about. I think this will really help you. If you're feeling unable to venture out of bed some days, I think this course of action is definitely worth a try.

Plus, keep talking here on this thread and join in other threads that interest you. There are lots of understanding people here.

Hope to hear more from you.

🌻birdy

[Shred1106]

Hey there bydde1607 -

I am pleased you made the decision to log into these forums they are very helpful to so many people. So, well done! You can always come here and just be accepted.

I can relate to your anxiety description particularly with regard to "overthinking". I was diagnosed with depression over 20 years ago and only 18 months ago anxiety was added to it. I have had 1 full blown panic attack which led to hospital but many other smaller ones.

Can I suggest your first stop would be your GP. Many of them now are very aware of mental health issues and can help. What may then be also of help is to obtain a Mental Health Plan from them to get referral to a psychologist.Those 10 psychology visits are free if under a Mental Health Plan.

You mention you are a student. Many places of study offer free support to students - perhaps you might do that.

I can't explain my anxiety to anyone and frankly I don't believe I have to. Can I ask why you feel you might need to explain it? The feelings that we feel at the time are ours and, I believe, unless someone else has anxiety they cannot understand. In fact, I have several terrific friends who I contact when an attack is starting and they support me in various ways. One does breathing with me, another just helps me to run through the five senses to help me "reground" i.e What can you see, what can you feel etc. I came to this action plan with my psychologist. One of these friends also says to me what I am feeling is real for me at that time but also that she is just "there" with me to walk beside me till my attack passes.

Anyhow, I hope I have been of some help. Know you are not alone and that anxiety is a part of who we are. It is manageable but takes some work. Part of that for me is actually accepting what I have just said to you - i.e it's a part of me.

There are loads of supportive people on here who are supportive and helpful.

I wish you the best...

[smallwolf]

Hi and welcome to beyond blue.

I don't have much to add as the other posts have summed up up quite well.

Only comments I will add are...

I still find it hard to explain to people what it is like.

Rather than trying to explain the anxiety if I am reading your post correctly, is to explain what is bothering you at a moment in time.

Even if you need to write it down. With many thoughts going on in your mind can be hard to create a coherent sentence.

Secondly is there someone that you can talk to openly about it, and especially when it gets bad for you. Ie have a couple of contacts that you call when you need to. Or send them a text message. They will help you gain a perspective on things.

And if things get bad, look for distraction tools to get you back into the moment. But follow the advice of the other posters.