How do I learn to trust the professionals?

[Bluey_moon]

I have GAD and a bit of OCD, my obsession at the moment (well has been for some months now), is me having schizophrenia. I have been told by a few professionals that i'm not! How do i learn to believe them in the long term?

[blondguy]

Hi Bluey

I have had GAD for a years and some OCD too. Its awful and sometimes too I think about Schizophrenia. Its awful and (in my humble opinion) you dont have schizophrenia as far as I can tell for two very good reasons

* You wouldnt be on here if you did

* The chemical/biological triggers dont let you think and articulate the way you do which is as 'normal' as I am!

Your professionals are right Bluey 🙂 Your words are strong and you speak from the heart....Nice1

(my brother had Schizophrenia...)

Be Gentle to Yourself and you are Legend by the way Bluey

Kindest Regards

Paul (Woof!)

[blondguy]

PS (sorry Bluey)

If its a tiny bit of help.....I dont always 'believe' my specialist......I listen .....yes....but then I can take it from there.If I may ask a question.....Are you currently working?

Kind thoughts

Paul

[Bluey_moon]

I am working Paul! And it helps to be honest! 

i believe them, but I guess the way of it with anxiety is I think, what if I was having a good day, what if I forgot to tell them something, what if they missed something. 

I worry incessantly about hearing voices, what if I start to? And often at night when people walk past I'll hear them but if I can't see them I freak out! And I argue with myself at lot lol, but it seems a lot of people on here do that! 

[blondguy]

It was just a question Bluey....about working that is....sorry....

You are a legend on here...seriously and if you even had mild Schizophrenia it would be be very difficult for you maintain a job or what you have achieved on here....I meant what I said about my brother.....he had it and I saw all the symptoms......

BB is wonderful and being positive is what you and I do....But Im just being a 'positive realist'.....

Have you done your research about when Schizophrenia 'kicks in'? as in the age? You mentioned about 'that you worry incessantly about hearing voices' (Key word there is 'worrying' about hearing voices.....or do actually hear them like someone in the room')

Sorry about the blunt question (and you can ask me anything bye the way) but you are way too focused to be anywhere near remotely having Schizophrenia

Paul

[Bluey_moon]

Oh my I didn't mean to sound defensive, I just ment I find it helpful to work, distraction, you know! 

I read the onset is slightly older in women (I'm 34 by the way). 

Um, mostly I worry a lot! Never voices in the same room, when I descibed my inner dialogue to my psych, he said that was my inner voice, it is me arguing in my head, always my voice!

Did you ever worry you would get scizophrenia, does it run in your family. Please don't answer if it's too personal! 

Thank you for your insight! 

You are very kind

[blondguy]

Hey Bluey...Yes I do worry about Schizophrenia but I know that even though my brother had it...he couldnt function or articulate the way you or I do. This dreadful mental disorder usually 'kicks in' (please dont quote me even though I have researched it) from late teens to mid twenties.....due to the biochemistry in the brain. It isnt normally transferred genetically....that is very rare....I dont have it....just the GAD and some OCD. You are well out of the demographic to just 'become Schizophrenic'

What you did mention makes rock solid sense....its your inner voice.....I have the voice lol....always telling me what i should or shouldnt do....What my brother had was bad news.....the voices were real to him....and he actually acted out what the voices told him to do (extremely sad and tragic)

You dont have Schizophrenia Bluey....and its not too personal to ask by the way...that is what this site is meant to be about.....(i Think lol)

I worry all the time....same you lol.....its a real pain.....But it does show you have a kind and true heart Bluey...We just pay the price for having that big heart....Im getting used to it....:-)

I am actually relieved what you described to your psych......"your inner dialogue".....and he said "it was your inner voice"

I am actually more worried (doh!) about my GAD .....which i shouldnt by the way lol...than anything else...especially Schizophrenia.

You are way too 'collected' in your mind to be even thinking about the 'S' word (easier than spelling it lol...try 'I Go to Sleep by Sia.......Tranquility at its finest....

Kind Thoughts & Hugs

Paul (Woof!)

[Bluey_moon]

Hi Paul, 

Firstly I would like to thank you, for your reassurance and your openness and your honesty! 

I read your post at 1:30am, and for obvious reasons, didn't answer back at that time! 

I was having a rough night and my reply wouldn't have been reflective of the way I really felt! i dreamt all night about the "s" word, and I would lay there concentrating hard to see if I was hearing voices! I know this is ridiculous, but my obsessive nature causes me to do this! 

My heart breaks for your brother, he must have been very frightened! 

Paul, thank you for sharing such personal experience with me and for your kind comments about me! 

Skye

ps: I work in a pharmacy, not the best place for someone with health anxiety lol

[Bluey_moon]

Hi Paul, 

i talked to a person in the mental health team at our base yesterday! Again they are saying I don't have the "s" word! That its my anxiety confusing me! 

But im having trouble believing them again! How do they know, what if they are missing something? 

😞

[White_Rose]

Hello Skye

If I could just jump in here. Your comments and thoughts would resonate with so many other people here. Not because they are concerned about "s" but because what you experience is also felt as part of their feelings of unwellness, if there is such a word.

I worry about my inner voices, the ones that tell me how useless I am, how stupid etc. I have discussions with myself trying to sort out different problems. As your psych said, our inner dialogue or inner voice has a lot to say. I will add that's it's not always good because we do not have an outside voice to bring some logic into the discussion. I once tried writing down my conversation using my left and right hands as the two protagonists. It was an interesting conversation. I must try it again.

I also question the experts, usually after the event. What if... is a common way of thinking. But in the big diagnoses the doctors and psychs generally get it right. And remember you have had this reassurance from more than one person. Yes, one person may get it wrong, but not a number of people. So what does your psych suggest you do when you get a thought stuck in your head? Do you have ways of getting it out again.

Actually it sounds a bit like an ear worm. You know when you get song a song or similar stuck in your brain and can't get it out again. It does eventually fade away so I hope you manage to push this thought into the rubbish bin where it belongs.

Mary