Feeling like I'm going to explode

[adaptaur]

Hi everyone.

I've no idea if this is the right place for this, as in I don't know if it's related to anxiety at all but it doesn't seem to fit elsewhere and I guess it makes me anxious so here it is. Sorry if this is the wrong place. Sometimes when something good happens, or... I feel really happy, is a poor way of putting it, but I'll just feel so full of love for the world and everyone in it and everything will make me want to cry, and I'll feel like my head is racing at 100 miles per hour and my stomach is being squeezed and my heart is beating like mad and my limbs are on fire, like I'm going to explode at any moment, or burst into flames, and the world around me is so still, too still, but I've got all this energy in me and I've no way of releasing it. I hate it so much, it makes me wish people were dead so they couldn't make me feel this way, although it's not about anyone in particular really, just... everything. You'd think this would be a positive feeling right, what else could it be, but it hurts terribly and no one seems to understand that I can't feel good without feeling awful at the same time, like it's impossible for me to feel something a little bit, it's always too much or not at all. I see a psychologist mainly for anxiety but she doesn't understand at all, she thinks I'm experiencing anxiety at the thought of losing my current happiness if that makes sense but it's not that at all. It feels impossible to explain what it's like, and I've never seen anyone talk about anything similar to this. I feel like this doesn't even begin to touch on how all-consuming and terrifying it is, it feels dangerous, I guess I know the feeling itself can't hurt me but I feel like I lose control of my mind and I could do something stupid. I'm sorry about this - I guess I just wanted to rant, I hate having to put up with it so much. Everything just feels too much.

[Sophie_M]

Hi adaptaur,

Welcome to our online community. We're sorry to hear that you're having trouble expressing this feeling that you're having to your psychologist and that it hurts terribly. It's worth expressing to them that you feel their understanding of the feeling you're having is not correct. This way they can better support you to help regulate it.

Please know that there is also support available to you if you need it in between sessions with Kids Help Line. They are a confidential and anonymous, telephone and online counselling service specifically for young people aged 25 and under.

Thank you for reaching out here to our community. If you're interested, we'd recommend that you take a look through some of our existing threads to see if you can relate to some of them.

 

[white knight]

Hi, welcome, I'm 64yo male.

You have actually described it better than I could have. No, you are not unique in having such feelings. With myself I had similar for decades until diagnosis (more on this later), I'd describe it as very high emotion, fear, insecurity and crying all at the same time. With me it was a cycle about every 3 weeks for 1 to 2 days then as I got older every 2 months for one day or so.

We cannot diagnose here. I am like you but with lots of lifes experience and with a mental disorder or two. Whats more is that although it is similar to my issue it doesnt mean you have Dysthymia, bipolar or depression like me. The brain is a complex instrument so you need the best care to figure it all out.

You could approach your psychologist and ask him/her to re-evaluate you in terms of your emotional state. You can show them this whole post if you think it will be easier to explain. By no means am I questioning the professionalism of your psychologist, just putting up a suggestion and trying to support.

In the meantime you can put the following into the search bar to do some reading up on what I think will benefit you.

Anxiety, how I eliminated it

Dysthymia

Also google-

Maharaji the perfect instrument

Maharaji sunset

Maharaji prem rawat appreciate

Finally, there is positives in every negative in life. High emotion brings with it some qualities not immediately apparent. For me it is poetry, for others it could be adventurism, artistry, music and so forth. Best to tap into this unique ability inside of you to discover something truly unique and wonderful. Maharaji Prem Rawat is on youtube with many videos you can watch- you'll grow and end up admiring all of yourself including this issue.

Thakyou for being brave enough to seek more help. We are online 24/7/365 so feel free to post anytime you feel a need.

TonyWK

[therising]

Hi adaptaur

I believe, we typically don't often address the significance of 'feelings' until they become too overwhelming for us to make sense of or handle.

Of course, activity in the body is good. Activity throughout our body is what basically keeps us alive. When the activity is basic, we typically don't feel it but when there's hyperactivity, we'll definitely feel it.

Due to a love of researching different aspects of self, I love researching natural aspects, mental aspects and biological or chemical aspects. Mind, body and nature are incredibly interactive. From personal experience, I've found this impossible to deny. Actually, just this morning I experienced the absolute heights of mental hyperactivity that can come with an overwhelming buildup of mental stress. Boy, did it take my body along for the ride. Almost impossible to breathe, my heart was racing and my stomach was churning enough for me to run to the toilet and gift it what I'd eaten last night. Sorry for the graphic. Vent #1 (the toilet episode). Vent #2 came in the form of uncontrollable sobbing for a period of time. Apparently, I was 'letting the stress out', as then I began to calm down, mentally. This mental hyperactivity had been building up for days, as had the physical impact, until venting became inevitable.

The hyperactivity that comes with the positive heights of excitement in my life also needs a vent occasionally, otherwise it eventually exhausts me. I have to invest it into something productive. If I'm not investing it in a positive outlet it can leave me feeling that 'I think I'm going to explode' vibe.

Whether it's stress, deep sadness or extreme excitement, joy or overwhelming love, I gotta vent. I suppose this is why you see people at happy occasions (weddings, the birth of a baby etc) venting/crying. That hyperactive ramp up of energy has to go somewhere. Better out than in, in most cases.

Figuring out how to channel that excess energy is part of the management in being sensitive enough to feel it. Not everyone's going to feel that kind of energy. It's kind of like regaining that natural ability to feel life, like when you were a kid. Whatever you do, don't let history repeat; don't let people tell you to 'calm down', instead find the best ways to channel your super natural ability to feel life.

By the way, being super aware of your own physical emotion (physical energy in motion) can definitely feel more like a curse than a gift at times.

🙂