Feeling like a failure

[Bluey_moon]

Feeling like I'm failing! 

The new meds I think are working ok, I'm not as anxious! 

But I googled tonight, epic fail! 

I just want to feel normal again! 

I know I have to work harder! 

Today I just  need encouragement!

[Bluey_moon]

Thank you everyone for your love and hugs, I've really needed them. 

Paul I missed your post a bit back, you weren't being blunt, none of you were, I know you all just care! 

Paul, I like reading romance novels (I know daggy) and like you I love 80's music. I like hanging with my family, I love snuggling with my puppy, we are trying to talk hubby into a kitten! I love shopping and coffee dates with friends! Unfortunately I've pulled back a bit from all this lately! 

Thank you everyone for your support, especially Paul, Sherie, Shelley and Dean and everyone else too!  

[Bluey_moon]

Hey Dean, 

Not sure if you are reading this thread still but I just wanted to check how you were getting on? How is your sight? How are both you and you wife coping? Just wanted you to know I was thinking of you! 

Hugs, Skye

[Bluey_moon]

Hey Paul, 

just wanted to check in on this thread, if you weren't reading the other one to check in on your mum, hope everything is ok? 

Skye

[Dwwmills]

Hi Skye.

We are doing okay at the moment. Thanks for asking. It’s just a bit of a waiting game at the moment as far as the eyesight goes. Originally my double vision was 12 dioptres out. At my visit to the ophthalmologist on Friday he remeasured it and it was 10 dioptres, so it’s getting better. I think my next appointment with an optometrist is next Friday and they’ll remeasure it. I’ll be happy if it moves any closer to 0. Apparently when it gets to 4 dioptre your brain can take over and turn that into a single image. It’s hard for me to notice any change because it is so gradual and I see it every day so I don’t notice the change. Hopefully it will sort itself out but if not there is prism glasses and/or surgery.

I’m just trying to find things I can do around the place so that I don’t go stir crazy.

I hope you are doing better. The more I think about it though the more I realise that your problem is not schizophrenia is just your OCD. I remember when my daughter was suffering severe OCD she had contamination fears. We spent so much time trying to convince her that germs around the house were not going to kill her that we wasted effort that we could have been directing at the OCD. It wasn’t until we had the OCD under control that all her other fears and anxieties when away. OCD can be really hard to tackle because the thing you fear is not really the thing you need to tackle.

I’ve said it before but your posts on trusting professionals and not searching the Internet for medical problems have really helped me.

 At the moment I'm hoping for the best but preparing for the worst.

Cheers

Dean

[Bluey_moon]

30 minutes til I meet the psychiatrist. I'm terribly nervous and scared! 

[Guest_1055]

Hello Skye

I will give you a huge hug and hold you hand, if you want. My thoughts are definitely with you. You are so so brave.

Much love to you

Shell xx

[Bluey_moon]

Hey everyone, 

so the appointment with the psyciatrist went ok. He said anxiety and Ocd traits. 

Then the hospital psycologist rang, I've been talking to your dr. Maybe you have bi-polar? Now they can't see me til Friday for a start then the 24th feb. 

im so confused, I'm so scared, I don't know what to do?! 

[Bluey_moon]

One is saying double meds, the other one is saying not too. My psycologist is busy. My work sent me home. My husband is working awAy today. I'm so confused and scared and I don't know what to do, who to believe?! 

[Dwwmills]

Hi Skye.

It’s always a bit confusing when you get contradictory advice. Your psychiatrist is by far the most qualified to be diagnosing mental illnesses and more qualified to prescribe medication.

I would be getting the psychiatrist and your psychologist to talk to one another and sort that out between them. I’m sure your psychiatrist would have considered bipolar but dismissed it in your case as well, just as he did schizophrenia. If you’re a psychologist now thinks you may have bipolar he should discuss this with the psychiatrist. It may be a good thing that they can’t see you to 24 February as this will give them time to sort it out between themselves. They need to be working together in your best interest not giving you separate information that could confuse you.

By the looks of what you are saying in your previous post your psychiatrist thinks you have anxiety and some OCD traits. How is he proposing to treat these?

Try to take a big breath and relax. This will sort out. You don’t have all the answers yet so it will be difficult for you to make a decision. You will have two live with some uncertainty for a little while. Just trust that no matter what happens you will have the ability to make a decision in the end.

Cheers

Dean

[Bluey_moon]

Hey Dean, 

Thank you for your post, considering how much you yourself are going through, I'm very blessed to receive your advice! 

At the end of the day what is is what is and the main thing is concentrating on getting better! Whatever that entails! I need to do that for me and my family! I've been told it is treatable at worst case if I have it! 

Thank you for caring!!

how are you, I know the vision thing must be getting to you! It's hard to be patient I know but hang in there. Is there any other effects from the stroke! 

Take care Dean!