Feeling Detached When Communicating

MaiiBear · ‎06-12-2017

It's strange. I am a persistent person and I'd like to think I can throw things under the rug but it doesn't completely go away. When people say "get over anxiety" and "just talk to people more", I do it. It doesn't stop me from internally panicking but I do it and I seem fine to others besides my apparent awkwardness and lack of emotion/hype? I don't know. Whenever I talk to someone I'm fine but a minute into the conversation I can't hear what they're saying and my vision blurs and then I don't know what's happening and forget how to speak because my head goes blank and my mouth goes dry, but I'm not necessarily panicking. I just feel like I'm losing control of my senses and forgetting how to be a human being and it's ruined my relationships with everybody because I can't relate to them or hold a conversation.

I had a mock interview today and the only way to calm myself down was to pretend I was an actor in a movie and at one point I actually had to force myself to go through with it because I felt so eerily detached and it's happening too often. I'm doing the best I can to manage it but does anyone else know how to get past it?

geoff · ‎07-12-2017

hello MaiiBear, can I welcome you to the forums and it takes a great deal of bravery and strength to post your first comment, so well done.
What you have told us is that it seems to be that you're suffering from social anxiety, because this will make us turn off from being able to concentrate what anyone is trying to tell us.
Can you remember when someone keeps telling you that you've done something wrong, eg. a parent, all you want to do is run away, this maybe the beginning of your social anxiety, maybe you can let us know. Geoff.

blondguy · ‎07-12-2017

Hello MaiiBear

Many of us feel the same communicating when we have low or high levels of anxiety. We are so busy using all of our emotional (and physical) energy dealing with the anxiety we do become mentally 'tired' thus bringing on the feelings you describe.

Can I ask if you have been diagnosed with an anxiety disorder? Throwing a rug over anxiety may provide a little peace of mind but the problem is 'still under the rug'

A good GP can work wonders here to help you help yourself to find some peace of mind

I hope you can stick around as there are many gentle people on the forums that can be here for you 🙂

My apologies for the late response to your post. We are usually pretty quick

My Kind thoughts

Paul

MaiiBear · ‎07-12-2017

Thanks, I was worried about that. The main reason I'm here now is because people have asked me if I have it and then told me they thought I did, it's to the point I was given the "shyest person of the year" award in my school formal a month ago. I'm not too sure about the other thing, though. I think there's a switch in my head on default that keeps telling me not to mess up and act normal but then it causes me to do the opposite. My mum and I aren't close and my dad is always working, but I feel like it could have stemmed from her because she's had a mostly negative (as much as I hate to say it, because I feel like not everything is intentional and I don't like conflict) impact on my life. I sometimes forget the things she's said and done to me and remember it later when I think I'm ready to smooth things over. As for friends and peers, again I don't know. I'm mostly left out and nobody really talks to me.

It might just be an "out of practice" type of thing, and I'm left behind because of my inexperience. I hope that isn't the case

MaiiBear · ‎07-12-2017

Mentally drained is a good explanation for how I feel the majority of the time. I haven't been diagnosed for any disorders, though I have asked a GP before. I felt odd about the whole situation because I originally came in after being set aside for a month or two, brushed off as fine after having a blood test (which I had a panic attack during before fainting because I'm one of those 'faints during blood tests' people). Since then I've been doubting a lot of things so I haven't really attempted to visit another or ask my dad a second time. I'm worried I'm exaggerating.

Thanks for your kind words. It really means a lot to have support, and it's fine. Not everyone is online 24/7 and I appreciate you taking time out of your day to reply

blondguy · ‎08-12-2017

Hi MaiiBear.......Thankyou for the super nice feedback 🙂

Thankyou so much for posting back and being a part of the forum family

I understand you about blood tests.....ewwww....they give me the creeps...

You are stronger than you think as you speak so well from your heart......there are many people that cant do it as well as you have MaiiBear

You arent exaggerating in any way. The Beyond Blue forums are here for people that have doubts or matters on their mind no matter what the issue is.

Just an idea if thats okay MaiiBear....Copy & paste/print this thread out and see your GP. The GP's are very understanding you will feel better after having a vent....

You have everything to gain and nothing to lose by doing so...if you wish of course..

I understand about being shy as I was very very shy when I was in school and it was a pain

You are not alone here MaiiBear....Great new Avatar by the way!

I hope Friday is good to you

My Kind thoughts

Paul