Fear of being sick :((

[Bulletin_Board_Archive]

Originally posted by: Angel on 15 February 2013

Hi there, my name is angel, i am female and i am 22. This is been the first time I am writing about my issue and it is very hard to admit. I have a severe phobia. That is of being sick. Not just getting sick like cold or flu, but nausea and throwing up. I don't know where this phobia came from but it has plagued my life for the past 5 years. I constantly have anxiety after I eat a meal. I convince myself I'm going to throw it up. My mind convinces me that I am and I start getting hardcore nausea. I won't even be sick, but I will think about it so much I ACTUALLY think I'm going to throw up. My chest tightens, I can't breathe, I start shivering and shaking and my heart races. I have to take benzodiazepines to calm down from the thoughts. i avoid social situations as MUCH as I can in case I feel like throwing up. I eat one meal a day and the smallest bit and I convince myself that there's no way I could throw up if my stomachs empty. I feel so ashamed to have this phobia. Nobody knows. No one. Not a single soul. I beat myself up at work after I eat even the smallest thing. I dont eat breakfast in case i am going to throw up on the train ride to work. im constantly taking tablets (to stop nausea) because I have nausea EVERY SINGLE MIN of the day and night. I am so physically and mentally drained. I want the psychotic thoughts about vomiting to stop. I feel like there is a devil in my head that does this to me, even if i go one SECOND and busy myself with something else, it will creep up on me Again. and again and again. This phobia is so severe I am so drained I want to kill myself just to stop the thoughts and fear. From the second I wake up to the second I fall asleep I'm fearing I'm going to vomit. I wake up in the middle of the night from anxiety and i think omg what if i throw up right now? its making me insane actually insane. I'm always so hungry but I torture myself so much about being sick that I don't touch food. :( is there anyone else out there like this? I feel like an alien. How can someone obsess over something so normal to the human being? Please someone help me. Is this a normal phobia?...?... i don't even know where to start for help because I am SO ashamed and embarrassed to have this phobia. Whoever has been so kind to read this please don't think I am a freak, I'm just in desperate need of help I don't know what to do Any thoughts will be appreciated xx

[Subudra]

Hi ☺ i know this was posted ages ago. I just wanted to know if you found anything helpful? Thinking about being sick makes me completely immobilizes me at times. Especially when it would be so embarrassing, thinking about it just makes my stomach drop this neusia just grows inside my stomach. Its fusterating when you know its just your head messing with you. Did you find a coping strategy?

[Zeal]

Hi Subudra,

I understand this feeling all too well. I was diagnosed with an anxiety disorder (OCD) at 13, so ten years ago now. I've had a phobia of vomit since primary school. My OCD centres on a fear of germs and contracting illnesses. It has become a bit worse over the last month or so, after discontinuing job training and realising how much I need to focus if I want to get into Honours at uni next year. Like you, I have not yet found a reliable coping strategy. I would also be very interested in hearing about other people's ideas. I hope both of us can find some coping strategies 🙂

Best wishes,

SM

[Chris_B]

Hi Subudra, welcome to the forums. Try using the search function and type in emetophobia.

We have had quite a few threads on this topic and some of them are more recent than this one.

[Alyciae]

Trust me you are not alone at all! I spent ages trying to search the web and I was surprised by how many people wrote about that phobia and I myself suffer too. The extent of mine is that bad to the point where I won't wear certain clothes incase I vomit because I'll never wear them again. It really helps to open up about it, a psychologist or your gp, they won't properly understand because they aren't going through what you're going through but they really can help even if they just listen. I got recommended to try hypnotherapy with someone who specialises in phobias, I haven't yet done it but I got told it could help. Please please don't think you're an alien or anything like that! wishing you all the best with it!

[sbsi908]

Hey,

id like to thank you first for sharing this issue.

i too, had this problem at 16-17 years old, and today it's slightly morphed into something else which I'll explain later.

i developed an intense fear of vomiting after falling ill when I was 15. I'm not sure why, but it traumatised me and I became so scared to eat thinking "what if it's expired? What if I have a virus that'll suddenly kick in after eating this?" The feeling of nausea and vomiting is so terrifying to me that back then, I was actually hardly eating. And when I would, I'd have anxiety for hours after any meal. Having this sort of anxiety made me develop stomach aches and nausea, which I wouldn't believe was my anxiety creating those symptoms against my fears.

over time I've settled that fear and don't fear eating as often now, only when it's meats like chicken and fish from a restaurant, then I will fear food poisoning. But it is now more focused on gastro viruses such as Norovirus. Last year, there were many gastro(Norovirus) outbreaks in my city and that included my work place. This lead me to barely eat, and wash my hands so excessively with hot water because I was so scared of contracting the virus since it's very contagious. but at least I don't fear eating or throwing up for no reason now.

my best advice for you would be accept that anxiety is going to cause your stomach to ache or feel discomfort, which will only increase your anxiety more.minor Exposure therapy would be great - start by eating meals and relax after while reminding yourself "just because I ate doesn't mean I'm going to throw up. Why would I even throw up?". Meditate on those thoughts.

Just remember you're not alone, I too have a fear of vomiting and it'll only take us some time to get over that fear.

Take care of yourself! 😊