Don't know where to turn.

[Callie11]

Hi, I'm new to all of this so please bare with me.

Im a 24 year old female and I CONSTANTLY get told I look about 18. It never used to bother me up until the last year or so where i've started to get really anxious about being in any conversation talking about age. I know it seems silly, and even when I read this back to myself I just want to say 'get over it', but I just can't. People always assume i'm just out of high school and still living with mum and dad when in reality I finished school 7 years ago! The look on people's faces when I tell them I'm 24 humilates me and makes me want to melt into a puddle on the floor. I've recently started a new job and i'm petrified of anyone finding out my age as I know the comments will begin. I'ts getting to the point that its creating social anxiety and I almost feel a panic attack coming on sometimes. I'm fine when i'm with my friends, all of the fear mainly happens when i'm in the workplace. I know I have created this anxiety myself, but how do I stop it?

It's getting worse and i'm worried i'm going to end up making myself depressed.

[Zeal]

Hi Callie,

Welcome to the forum!

I am a 23 year old female who doesn't look 23. People usually think I look about three or so years younger.

I can understand why you might be more inclined to feel self-conscious about not looking your age in the workplace. Small things you can do for now are: standing up straight/sitting with good posture, dressing for your age and your workplace, speaking in a clear and articulate way, and being conscientious at work. These are small but crucial things that can help confidence and self-image.

If you don't mind me asking, have you had a history of anxiety? Going to your doctor is a good idea, as social anxiety can be improved with intervention strategies, such as gradually exposing yourself to feared social situations. Small steps are the aim, so you don't become overwhelmed. It's great that you feel at ease with your friends. Talking to a few close friends about how you feel could help you voice your fears and get some friendly advice.

The positive thing about looking young for your age is that it will be a bonus when you're older!

I recommend looking at the resources on this site about anxiety, as well as on this site: http://www.cci.health.wa.gov.au/resources/consumers.cfm

I hope something I've said has been helpful 🙂

Best wishes,

SM