stress and depression

[viper57]

Hi. I have been doing well for a while. Now started getting what i call floaters then panic one time my arms jumped. Lots is happening since returning to WA. Family turned on us. Just after returning. I now have RA. All things are making me sad. My mum dying 6 years ago is haunting me. Just doing everyday stuff is hard. I am sick at the moment. That doesnt help. Having RA. Is a pain. There are things i cant do anymore. Not happy

[white knight]

Hi viper

I don't know what RA is ?

At any rate it might seem obvious to some that our lives come and go, ebb and flow, in terms of emotion...far more pronounced than those without emotional struggles.

My dad died in 1992. Often I close down. I might be emotional about life and I think about him. Not knowing that it wasn't him that I was originally upset about.

Our minds are weird sometimes

Tony WK

[viper57]

RA. Is rheumatoid arthritis. I photo of my mum showed up on facebook. Then i got upset. Its 6years on the 21st june. With everything else going on its getting hard. Our son and if wife have shut us out of their lifes. Her parents dont like us we are not good enough. He takes their sides all the time. We arent well of and live in a caravan. They are all full of money

[pipsy]

Hi Viper. I should imagine the RA would be extremely painful, causing you depression because it stops you from enjoying life. Are you taking anything to alleviate the pain. Where does the RA affect you the most? Is it general or all over? It's disappointing your son has chosen to ignore you. Can you speak to him at all or is this impossible? Maybe a trip to your Dr to explain your discomfort. It's possible you may be eligible for financial help to get you into a small house. With RA, I should imagine warm surroundings would help ease the pain. Try and see if your Dr can give you a certificate to get you out of the caravan. With a certificate from the Dr, the housing dept might be able to assist with getting you into somewhere, where you can keep warm. RA is bad with cold weather.

Lynda.

[viper57]

Hi. I am on medication for RA. a injection once a week. To get a housing rental here through government takes 2 to 5 years. Just isnt any. Our caravan is onsite with solid annex. It does have a good heater. Our son didnt include us in any of the wedding arrangements. We did ask to help they said no. They didnt even ask how we were getting to the wedding. Her family said they would tolerate us emagine how we felt. Her mum even said our son was old enough now and didnt need our help. In the end it got bad. We didnt go to wedding. He was lying to us after meeting his now wife. Never had xmas with them. He would never remember our birthdays etc. He was at their place all the time. Its like he has now got the family he always wanted. I am gutted

[pipsy]

Hi Viper. Your son sounds rather selfish, if I may say. You may have to just accept his decision and concentrate on your own well-being. I presume there are no other children. Where you are, are there neighbours who can be called on for emergencies. Do you have any other family close, like a sister, brother? Perhaps through Angli-care you could arrange for someone to check with you and see you are okay. Angli-care does have a home visits programme for people with disabilities who are unable to get around for shopping, Dr's etc. I don't know what state you're in, I'm from Qld and we have two or three companies who take people shopping etc. I actually volunteer with one and there are two more I know of. Because of your disability, I think you would qualify for this help.

Lynda

[viper57]

Hi pipsy. I agree he is very selfish. and thinks he can talk down to us. They all like to drink we dont. They had house warming . We didnt get invited. Even when the got engaged her family. And our son went to singapore. We didnt know about that. I dont understand why he is like this. We dont have any other family. We live in western australia. He said he would look after us. After we sold in tasmania. Never happened. It really looks like he prefers. Her family that have money to us. There really isnt any words to this. My husband and me both have arthritis all different types. Im just hoping phycologist can help. Im 59. Hubby 62 we really shouldnt have to deal with this. Thanks for letting me let of steam

[pipsy]

Hi viper57. I'm just glad I was here to allow you to 'vent'. We all need someone we can rant to when times get rough. Maybe one day son will come to see you. Whether he does or not, I hope you can get some help. I have two kids, I've been lucky, mine have always been there. Many lose their kids, like you. It hurts like Hell, but sometimes it works out better. I know that doesn't really help, but you need a son you can talk to, he has proved he is rather selfish. Your son actually sounds like he is a follower rather than a leader. By that I mean he is easily talked into believing all he has to do is watch and follow. Decisions are not his strong point. His decisions so far have been influenced by his wife and her parents. You did nothing wrong except love him and he threw it back. I don't think he is capable of true love. He thinks he has it with his new 'family'. If anything happens to him health-wise, he may get a shock. Take real good care of each other. Anytime you need to talk, we're here.

Lynda.

[White_Rose]

Dear Viper

Hello, it's good to meet you. It must be very painful to find your son will have nothing to do with you. Maybe his new family has taught him that only people with money count. I am so sorry you have missed out on milestones like engagement and wedding.

Lynda's suggestion of getting medical certificate from your GP is good. There may be a waiting list but if you don't get on it you will not get a home. And as both you and husband have RA it may move you up the list. So put your name down and see what happens.

It's good you are working with a psychologist. It will help you move on from your son's behaviour, which is atrocious. Now is the time to concentrate on your own lives, where you live and what you do. Is it possible to return to Tasmania or would you prefer to live in WA?

Mary

[viper57]

Hi its not possible to move anywhere now. We live on my husbands pension. Centrelink say i could work. They should live in my world. we will look into government housing. We only lived in tasmania 6 months. It wasnt for us. You think at our age we would have seen what was happening with son. But we didnt