Anyone quit a job due to not having a grip on Anxiety?

Zeity · ‎01-09-2019

I have been in my role for 7yrs. It offers flexibility, ridiculous great hours but poor pay, lil progress and a boss who will praise you one day and humiliate you in a meeting room the next. Ive been buried in a pressure cooker for the last 2 months and finally uttered the words IM DONE...penned a letter, decorating with thanks yous and fluffy stuff and admitted it was to take time off for self-care, basically due to "health" reasons. I dont have a back plan and my husband is currently not earning. But ive spent 2 months not sleeping, not eating, working almost 3 times the amount i csn physically do. When he turns on you, he is anniliating. Basically, i go to work in constant fear that im going to stuff up and get told off by him all the time....and i just need a bresk to sort my life out and reset my head to die doen the crazy chatter. It is stupid for me to not have another job lined up and resign.in 48hrs but the reality it is my anxiety wont let me look for a shop whike i still work there. Itll be written all over my face

Nervybella · ‎08-09-2019

Hi Zeity

Sorry to hear you’re still feeling this way. Although it’s great to see you’ve sought out professional help in your GP and Psychologist- you’re on the right path

You say that you can’t speak to the regular worker when she returns as she will be too busy (is that correct?). Could you make a meeting/appointment time a few days or week after she comes back just to ask her for clarification or air your concerns with her? Perhaps you could word it in such a way that you want to learn from her (if you feel uncomfortable telling her exactly what’s going on). Obviously I don’t know if this would work for you or your work.

Move just recently started a new technique called “worry time”. Whenever I worry about something during the day I jot it down on paper but then don’t delve into the thought. Then once a day I have a set 30 minutes where I sit in my room and read over my worries and allow myself to really worry. I’ve found it helps me so during the da I can actually enjoy time with my family or friends

hope you can find some time to rest and look after yourself

best

bella.

Zeity · ‎13-09-2019

* IMPORTANT UPDATE *

With 24hrs to go before doing a handover from the 6wk role that has stressed me out...i had a severe panic attack in public on the way to work where i passed out and ambulance was called. I was monitored in icu for 24hrs. My husband lost 3 days work. I wasnt present at the handover to be on the front foot for my errors or concerns. My boss has told my husband to take all the leave i need and he'll support me. And i feel ashamed, embarrassed, selfish...my husband wants me to take time off to rebuild myself. Yes, i have a therapist, gp and started antianxiety medz...but i dont know what to fo with my time.. or how i feel going back to work....and the timing couldnt be worse....and im overthinking again....i dont want to talk to anyone and im scared to go to the shops and bump into anyone i work with...i should be grateful...but i feel unworthy of all the support and it puts pressure on me to snap out of this anxiety but i dont know how! I shpuldve listened to my therapist and trusted my boss "Whats the worse that can happen? All mistakes can be fixed..." I feel Ive put them in a terrible situation by not going there now. It's like everyone is waiting for me to re-emerge into a better me and i just want to bury myself in a hole and hide. If i thought i made a mess before i sure threw a spanner in the works now. My advice for anyone worried about asking for help..JUST MUSTER THE COURAGE TO DO IT! Your work is either going to be supportive or not. If theyre not and you have to leave, you will get better away from that toxic environment then. As anxious people, we only focus on worse case scenario. Sometimes we just have to trust in the process of Life and just go with it...because we are worth it and we deserve enjoy our lives. I cant turn back time. Im in a new rut now. But i have to see it through now and hopefully come out the best version of myself i can be.

Zeity · ‎23-02-2021

* LONG OVERDUE UPDATE *
After 8 years, I resigned from a job that chipped away at my spirit. I felt light and at peace. I started a new job yesterday. Completely different field. Completely different work environment. And I feel emotional. I feel like I'm carrying heavy emotional baggage from my last 8 years and I just cant seem to offload it. I'm waiting to stuff up, get told off for it, be humiliated or fired. Even though there is a part if me that says youve only been in the role for 16 hours. I feel like I'm not doing enough. I'm a disappointment. I earned this. This feels like a reward. I want to embrace it and I just cant. I feel lost and emotional and I dont know how to snap out of it.

Nervybella · ‎18-07-2021

Hi Zeity!

it’s been a long while! Sorry no one picked up on your update back in February… how are things going with the new job now? I’d love to hear from you 🙂

I just recently started a new job (going into week four tomorrow) and it’s pretty overwhelming, let alone being thrown into work from home now too!

I get what you mean about feeling emotional… I have been very teary on and off since starting my new job. I think some of that comes down to feeling out of place and out of our comfort zones. What do you think?

hope to hear from you!
best, Bella

Auton · ‎18-07-2021

as this just got bumped - I pretty much have quit a job coz of this.

I was really good at it but faced unnecessary pressure from the MD of the company, my client was excellent but internally I hated it but as I needed the job I couldn't confront the MD or I'd be sacked basically, and I'd have reacted really badly to that coz i really hated him lol. So i kind of took it/hid from it until I was stressing on the nights before i was in the office (i was based in client 4 out of 5 days a week) and i wasn't sleeping those nights so i quit and took a similar but easier job.