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Anxiety

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Chris_B Forums etiquette: give support to receive support
  • replies: 0

Hi everyone, particularly any new members who may be reading. From time to time, we get contacted by members who are unhappy that they haven’t received a lot of replies to their posts. Our community champions work very hard to make sure that all newb... View more

Hi everyone, particularly any new members who may be reading. From time to time, we get contacted by members who are unhappy that they haven’t received a lot of replies to their posts. Our community champions work very hard to make sure that all newbies are welcomed when they first post, and we understand that it’s a big step to post for the first time on a forum like this, especially if you aren’t feeling great. It’s important to remember, though, that these forums are a community of real people, just like you, not a one-on-one support environment like going to see your psychologist. To get the best out of being here, one of the best tips we can offer is give support to receive support. Being a good community member means: participating in different threads (not just your own), replying to people who have taken the time to reply to you (even if it’s just to say thank you), and... posting words of emotional support and encouragement when you see others who are hurting and reaching out. You don’t have to feel obliged to solve the problems of others: that’s not what we’re here for. But you can offer empathy and what you’ve learned from your own life experiences, even if it’s just a line or two, eg. “I don't know what to say, but I want to give you my support and tell you I care about what is happening to you and hope life will get better soon.” Try to develop an interest in the journeys of others here on the forums. You may be surprised at how good being an active, caring member here can make you feel. For those of you who have had good experiences giving support here on the forums, please post in this thread here and let us know how it has helped you on your journey.

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Benny83 Shy bladder
  • replies: 1

Im a 38 year old male and from as long as i can remember have always had trouble using public toilets fearing the urinals. I mean if i walk in and no one else is there i dont have a problem but if someone walks in and im halfway through i lock up and... View more

Im a 38 year old male and from as long as i can remember have always had trouble using public toilets fearing the urinals. I mean if i walk in and no one else is there i dont have a problem but if someone walks in and im halfway through i lock up and cant finish. So most of the time i just go straight for the stall and even then can take a good 20 seconds to start going. Its got nothing to do about being embarrassed or anything because i cant even go infront of my wife. It has stopped me doing a lot over the years because whenever we have plans to go away or leave the house im always stressed about not being able to go. Theres been many times when we have gone out for drinks and i go to go to the toilet and cant go so have to go back 5 mins later and try again. My mates always asking me to go away fishing and have a few beers out in the boat but i keep making excuses to try and avoid embarrassment because he just pees over the side of the boat. I was talking to a counselor the other day and told him about it and he said he has the same problem and said you'd be surprised how many guys tell him the same thing. Im going to be seeing him regularly now to try and get some confidence back in myself and hopefully do something about it. Ive actually lost a few friends by rejecting them all the time and has become a problem with my relationship over the years as well. Im going to do what i can to get through this. Cheers Ben

Yonderly Hi, I'm new and need help overcoming my growing anxiety
  • replies: 1

I have been diagnosed with severe anxiety in the past but I fear that it has gotten worse the more I go on with life. I feel like what triggered it unfortunately was the passing of my mum due to cancer during a time of my beginnings of 'growing up'. ... View more

I have been diagnosed with severe anxiety in the past but I fear that it has gotten worse the more I go on with life. I feel like what triggered it unfortunately was the passing of my mum due to cancer during a time of my beginnings of 'growing up'. I'm turning 20 this year but it feels like I am repeating the same year my mum passed away. I was in Year 12 and was told to focus on my studies for my future, but how was I supposed to when my future wouldn't have my mum in it? I was in denial through the whole time until her death. I didn't mean to but my depression and anxiety took the turn for the worst and I attempted one time during her journey of trying to overcome it. I was so ashamed that I couldn't face her and maybe that's why I was in denial, why would I do that when she is the one actually suffering? Part of me is saying that it's because I wanted it to be me. She was so young, she had so much goals to reach... She was the only person during the hardest times of my life that I felt comfort. It wasn't her fault but it just opened up a new fear in me, of falling in love. It's funny cause I am in a relationship with a person so understanding, patient and caring. But the thoughts linger of losing him, or he could do better than someone like me. I have so much baggage that he doesn't need to deal with. It's bad enough I have an increasing social anxiety that is affecting my relationship with my partner, family and friends. But also, I feel like I have this compulsive behaviour to do certain things cause in my mind it makes sense? (like a comfort or it will give me a 'good day tomorrow'). For example, before I sleep I always make sure I have the brightness down on my laptop, an exact number of volume (6 taps always) of the music I always need to keep the voices or thoughts away. If I don't do that I get anxious.

Kate_S How to cope with multiple panic attacks at night?
  • replies: 2

Hey guys, My health anxiety has recently fallen into a flareup and about a month a go I started having panic attacks for the first time in 4 years. Now in this time I have seen multiple doctors, called the ambulance 3 times and have been to the ED tw... View more

Hey guys, My health anxiety has recently fallen into a flareup and about a month a go I started having panic attacks for the first time in 4 years. Now in this time I have seen multiple doctors, called the ambulance 3 times and have been to the ED twice. Have had 3 ECGs, multiple bloods, chest X-ray - all clear and my vitals are perfect every time they are checked, so really i'm really trying to accept and trust my heart is okay. In the last 4 days I have had multiple panic attacks each night and have been diagnosed with Panic Disorder. But these attacks still feel almost unbearable and its really starting to interfere with my life, I still have so much fear, I don't know what to do. Anyone have any tips/support/advice? Thanks

EJohn Fear and Anxiety and feeling overwhelmed and tired
  • replies: 2

I am overwhelmed and unable to cope with life's challenges in my adult life. Example. ( Assignments, exams, work, family, savings and future prospects in life. I am scared that I have missed the bus and I have not hope of recovery. When my mind becom... View more

I am overwhelmed and unable to cope with life's challenges in my adult life. Example. ( Assignments, exams, work, family, savings and future prospects in life. I am scared that I have missed the bus and I have not hope of recovery. When my mind becomes active first thing in the morning (when I start to wake up in the morning gradually) around 5am or 5.30. I dream about negative things happening to me. I am very fearful and feel that I want to hide in a safe place as I sense danger from me unable to handle or cope with the difficulties in life and its doom and gloom. I have been feeling like this when I get stressed with normal challenges in life as mentioned above - when I think how I am going to handle a difficult situation ( Exams, assignments, work, family, savings and future prospects in life) I have been on antidepressants and anti anxiety medications which provide temporary relief ( reduce the symptoms to a extent) but not permanently. I also take TMS treatments. As a child I grew up in a war zone sometimes fearing for my life. I feel very tired and helpless. I was told that I needed to build resilience and coping skills but how?

Ingenuitee A Racing Mind and No Positivity
  • replies: 1

Hi everyone, I'm not going to sugar coat anything, I feel pretty miserable. Let me summarise for you: - I rush ahead and predict the future, predict others thoughts and feelings, and try to control my own feelings. - I neglect myself, don't seek help... View more

Hi everyone, I'm not going to sugar coat anything, I feel pretty miserable. Let me summarise for you: - I rush ahead and predict the future, predict others thoughts and feelings, and try to control my own feelings. - I neglect myself, don't seek help, don't speak up, or even think my positives are worth sharing out of fear of arrogance and that I don't deserve to have positives. - Eventually I break down to folks, fear that I have hurt them, then continue to punish myself by restricting doing things I normally would enjoy. - These thoughts also pile up, hello depression, yes I can see you alongside my constant anxiety. - Things usually get so bad I think I can't even be slightly frustrated at minor things that help to relieve stress, like missing a train, I blame myself for the rest of the day. However only recently have I begun to meditate and really reach out because I cannot live like this anymore. Every drug (SSRI and SNRI) I take makes me confused and out of control, but I have to try other methods or I fear I will let my family and friends down. I regularly refuse to take my medication because I fear the addiction and it's a cop out. Everyone in my life is so nice to me, and all I give in return is anxiety, bottled up feelings, sadness and never ending worry. I am at the end of my rope, but I simply cannot let myself pass. It is too much to just let my family suffer for leaving, and I know I can do it if I try. I want to have my self esteem back, I want to be able to celebrate the positives, but every day I mention my problems I feel like I am being rude and negative, but I just want to get better. I want to control the "monkey mind" but I need more help. I wanted to reach out and ask you guys if you had any more ideas. Thank you.

PCL Anxiety about starting new job
  • replies: 38

Hi, I’ve been suffering from depression & anxiety for past 4 years after I was bullied at work from management after a workplace injury. I’ve been seeing a psychiatrist regarding this & they just seem to put me on pills. My biggest issues are I apply... View more

Hi, I’ve been suffering from depression & anxiety for past 4 years after I was bullied at work from management after a workplace injury. I’ve been seeing a psychiatrist regarding this & they just seem to put me on pills. My biggest issues are I apply for positions & go to interviews & 90% of the time get the job. I’m always really excited to start but then it all changes on the morning of starting. I can’t move & my anxiety just wont allow me to go in, so I email my new employer & make up excuse after excuse so never end up going. I recently got another position after 3 interviews & really sounds like a great place to work & full time with a reasonably good pay rate. My problem was I was meant to start this morning & again same anxiety set in so I made usual excuse & said I will need to start Monday which new employer has agreed to. I’ve tried taking paxam anxiety tablet befor bed & that still didn’t work. Any advice on how I might be able to get my anxiety in order so I can really get my life back on track & get back working again. I’m 48yo male. Thank you

Mark213 Fit for duty assessment advice
  • replies: 25

Back in October I went on stress leave due to work matters I have already addressed. I returned in November on a return to work plan - not workers comp related I wanted to deal with this internally. I was on medication to assist with my low mood and ... View more

Back in October I went on stress leave due to work matters I have already addressed. I returned in November on a return to work plan - not workers comp related I wanted to deal with this internally. I was on medication to assist with my low mood and feeling anxious. I had a mmreactioni ld reaction, reported it immediately and got off the medication with confirmation from my Doctor. My work sent me to a corperate medical doctor who stated that I to be supervised with staff and I cannot drive machinery, however he stated I am fit to work and need bipolar excluded by a Pyschiatrist. So, I went to a fitness for duty assessment with a Pyschiatrist and was determined that I have no mental illness, I'm fit to return to full duties and I was suffering from low mood which resolved on its own, no further treatment required. My doctor agreed I can return to work. I have sent my paperwork to my HR and the last meeting I had is they are still investigating for an outcome due to the conflicting reports with the Pyschiatrist and medical consultant. Has anyone been through something similar? Remember, this is not a workers comp claim. I'm starting to feel depressed because I feel like they want to terminate me.

Busylife Anxiety about staying away from home
  • replies: 2

Hello. I am seeking some advise please. I have had a diagnosis of anxiety for a number of years. I feel as I have got older the more intense the feelings. Anyway I have always had a fear of staying away from home, as a small child. I know where this ... View more

Hello. I am seeking some advise please. I have had a diagnosis of anxiety for a number of years. I feel as I have got older the more intense the feelings. Anyway I have always had a fear of staying away from home, as a small child. I know where this comes from, my alcoholic father. I always felt I needed to be home to protect my mum. Moving on I lost my husband at age 28, his body never found. Went on and married a beautiful man who is very supportive, kind and close to perfect. Lucky me! So at the end of day I know where this whole overwhelming feeling of anxiety stems from when I am confronted with having to stay away for more than a night from home. Which brings me to my current situation. My workplace has asked me to fly to a new area for 5 nights work. Initially I said yes, as this is what happens I have waves of feeling "I can do this" but once again after I commit, as I have done, my stomach is churning, I want to cry, one minute I am telling myself this will be ok, the next Im as flat as pancake wanting to run or fake an illness. Its a constant roller coaster of emotion that consumes me. The last time I stayed away from home without my husband was for 5 nights at a retreat who worked through some of these issues with me (which is now why I can pinpoint and understand my why) but I was an emotional wreck each night desperately seeking any opportunity I could to get home. Just a little more info, I am absolutely fine to stay away if my husband is with me. I have even stayed away for 3 nights with my son and coped fine. This was sometime ago and as I mentioned earlier this whole fear appears to be growing bigger as I age. Currently 45. My primary question is should I force myself to do this, go on this work trip solo? Would cancelling be giving in to the irrational thoughts, even though I can not exactly identify what my exact fear is, despite knowing where it stems from? Thank you for any advice.

MayBaby Are these intrusive thoughts?
  • replies: 5

TW: mention of self harm and suicide Hi all, I (27) have been struggling with some thoughts for the last couple of years, but I am unsure if they are intrusive thoughts going by what I have read online. Whenever I am stressed from work due to being a... View more

TW: mention of self harm and suicide Hi all, I (27) have been struggling with some thoughts for the last couple of years, but I am unsure if they are intrusive thoughts going by what I have read online. Whenever I am stressed from work due to being afraid of making mistakes or remember something I am embarrassed about I get repetitive thoughts or images in my head. It began with the image of harming myself. The thing is I know I wouldn’t action these thoughts. It is more a feeling of my brain not being able to cope or accept what is happening in reality so it just goes into these thoughts automatically to think of something else. My understanding of intrusive thoughts is the person is afraid that they will action on their disturbing thoughts. I feel these have been amplified in the last year working from home, almost as if I don’t have any co-workers or distractions around me blocking them out. Some background on me: I feel like I may have had intrusive thoughts as a child/ teenager. I can remember as a kid watching my parents making me dinner as I thought they could poison me. In school if a teacher was physically close to me I would have to block out the thought of kissing them. Aswell, I haven’t been diagnosed or anything but I am positive I have dermatillomania since I was younger, obsessively picking the skin of my fingertips when idle or stressed. I guess I am just wondering if what I am experiencing now are intrusive thoughts and if I should get help for them. It just sounds a little different to how others feel when experiencing them. thanks

ScaredBetty Constantly sick all the time- Health Anxiety?
  • replies: 1

I know I suffer severely from health anxiety and have for many years, I obsess over my health and I always think there is something majorly wrong with me which leads to many trips to the doctors and obsessive google searches about symptoms. My main q... View more

I know I suffer severely from health anxiety and have for many years, I obsess over my health and I always think there is something majorly wrong with me which leads to many trips to the doctors and obsessive google searches about symptoms. My main question though is this- I find I am always sick as in flu sick where I get a sore throat and chest and feel just generally unwell like I have a really bad cold or flu, and this happens to me all the time to the point where I miss out on a lot because I am constantly sick. I know anxiety can give you many physical symptoms but this is more like I have a really weak immune system and I am just sick all the time. I live a healthy lifestyle and I exercise and eat well and feel as though I do everything right to boost my immune system so its becoming really frustrating to come down with a cold all the time. I don't know if I am doing this to myself because my constant stress and anxiety is destroying my immune system and making me sick all the time, does anyone else experience this and have any advice? And how did you get back to your normal health.