Anxiety and drinking alcohol

[Adrian2014]

Hi all,

I have been having a hard time recently with anxiety and it has started to affect my daily life. I first suffered anxiety when I was around 24, I am now 30. It was after a fairly big life event, I was diagnosed with cancer although it was caught very early and I made a full recovery I had never really suffered from anxiety until after this, so I wonder if it was a trigger. I ended up taking CBT and it seemed to help and I got over it by changing jobs and doing something like stressful.

 Anyway, I then emigrated to Australia from the UK and have been fine, until recently. I have never really been able to handle hangovers and often engage in 'hair of the dog' to quell my anxiety. The last two weeks though it's got pretty bad, I didn't go to work for 3 days as I couldn't leave the house to go to work. I'd end up drinking from 9am which makes me feel better temporarily. I went to the GP who prescribed me some medication, i took it for the first day but i felt horrible on it. I resolved to myself that I would try to get better naturally by eating well and exercising etc. So last week was really good, however I then ended up getting really drunk on friday, felt awful on saturday so drank all day. Then sunday was the same. It's now Tuesday and I haven't been to work as i'm stuck in a bad cycle. The thought of going to work in the morning feels me with dread. I obviously can't keep on like this as I will lose my job if I keep taking days off.

 I know the alcohol is the root of the problems, I need to really moderate it and then I will be ok. Hopefully I can wean myself off today and get a good night sleep. Has anyone else been caught up in this self medicating with alcohol situation? I honestly don't think I am an alcoholic as I don't crave a drink when my anxiety is absent. It's just when it strikes, normally due to alcohol withdrawal I end up drinking again to make me feel better. I have hardly been eating the last few days and I have knots in my stomach. I woke up with terrible anxiety at like 4am and had to stop myself from reaching for some alcohol.  I just don't now what's causing it. Anyway this is a good site!

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[HA1]

Hi Adrian - thanks for the update.

i really hope that you have continued to feel better.  Everyone is different, but I guess the effect of the anxiety medication can vary in how they make you feel initially and how long they take to start really working.  So long as you recognise that there may be a temporary settling in period that you need to work through.

good to also hear that you are finding distractions, to stay away from booze.  That will definitely help.  I found that turning up your fitness regime works wonders, plus it gets all the right chemicals working in your head.

please stay in touch with us, and share what you are experiencing.

take care

k

[dougall]

Yeah you are my hero, well done and keep up with everything. As they say in Australia Good on ya mate.

[Adrian2014]

Unfortunately after a good Thursday, I didn't take my medication thursday night which was in hindsight a big mistake. I woke up Friday morning and felt ok, went to see a client, however as soon as I got back to the office at 10am i started freaking out. I ended up going for a walk at about 11am but the anxiety was just too strong and I went to the pub. Ended up drinking most of the day on and off and then had drinks with work last night but by no means was it a big session, 3 months ago I would have woken up and felt fine, I only finished about 9pm which isn't late and normally I would be ok the next morning. However because I had been drinking I didn't take the meds last night either, and I woke up at 7am feeling so full of anxiety. I was freaking out again. I kept myself busy until 8.30am and then went for a swim, it was tough making myself go but once I'd got in after about 20 minutes splashing around my mind cleared a bit and I felt happier. It's funny isn't it how when you are anxious time goes sooo slowly yet as soon as you feel calm time seems to go fast. I stayed in the water for an hour and a half but as soon as I got out i still felt on edge. I handled it for as long as I could but my anxiety was just so strong I started drinking again at 11am. I really am at my wits end. I have no idea how I am going to get through this but I seem a shadow of who I was only 2 months ago. I can barely get through a working day. I am going to take my meds tonight and make sure i take them every night without fail. I am confused, am I an alcoholic or am I an anxious person using drink to calm me? I believe I am using drink to calm me. Whilst I have always liked a drink, I have always been able to go days without a drink, and am able to have only two glasses and stop, that is before recently. It's not like as soon as I get a taste for it I cannot stop myself. I don't believe I have suddenly become a person who needs to drink at 11am to sort myself out and become an alcoholic. I just feel I am in a bad place and the only way to cope is alcohol. I have been stupid not taking the meds the last two days.

[HA1]

Hi Adrian - good to hear from you.

So sorry to hear that you have done it rough the last few days.  But very glad that you have now realised that you need the meds if you are going to get better.

You ask why you must drink.  If I may speculate, I think you used to drink to relax and appease your anxiety, you then started to drink because when you drank you forgot about everything else.  I will not specials about whether you are an alcoholic or not, but I would say that you have a serious dependency on alcohol to make you feel ok.  But as I said before, this is a temporary relief and the anxiety and/or depression will only get worse as you continue to fuel it with alcohol.

Apologies for being so blunt.  But we are here for you whenever you need support or the views of others who have been in that situation.

take care

k

[dougall]

Hi Adrian

Sometimes we get there quickly sometimes we get there slow, a day at a time is the best way to take it and not expect ourselves to be perfect, at least you are analysing things.

[dougall]

Hi Adrian how are you doing,

[Adrian2014]

Hi Dougall

Thanks for asking after me. Still drinking and still feeling anxious. I had a really good sunday. Went to the beach and didnt touch a drop of alcohop until 6pm when I met a friend for a drink. I had 3 glasses of wine and stopped. Felt very good. Monday though i went to work and had bad anxiety again. Ended up having a drink at 3pm and had about 5. Tuesday I felt fantastic. Best morning id had in ages. Was motivated at work and then we went to watch the races. Ended uo getting pretty drunk with the rest of my company however I stopped at 6pm so it wasnt a late one. This morning I felt really rough and again had a panic attack at work and went home at 10am and had a drink. Big setback. It seems to be I drink when I feel stressed and panic. I saw my DR again today for my follow up.I told him how I have been feeling. He has increased the dose so that I am taking my meds at night and then half in the morning half in the afternoon. He has also prescribed a betablocker to help with my panic. I suggested this to him as id been prescribed it before by my dr in the UK and it really worked. Will start the new regime tomorrow see how I go. How are you?

[Adrian2014]

Well I don't know if it the bet blocker making me calmer or the new regime on the meds but yesterday i felt like my old self. It was a really good day and I finally didnt feel detached. I have a big feeling the betablockers have a really positive impact on me, I feel the majority of my anxiety seems to be derived from a fast heartbeat which I hve suffered with for most of my life which even is probably linked to the fact I am always on edge and wear stres and social anxiety situations badly which means my fight and flight response is always kicking in. I even saw a cardiologist once a year ago after an episode of bad palipations after exercise and he diagnosed me with a form of tacharydia which he thinls was related to anxiety but apart from that said i was very healthy. The beta blocker has just slowed me right down and i dont get that rush of anxiety any more. I feel really positive I am getting back to myself old self.No idea why I didnt ask the soctor for them ages ago, they are well known for being effective with anxiety, as soon as i suggested it to my dr he didnt hesitate in the slightest and said yes lets do it.

[geoff]

dear Adrian, sounds good, fingers crossed. Geoff.

[Brooklyn01]

hey mate,

I just wanted to let you know that your not the only one 🙂 alcohol helps my anxiety when I have no were else to turn but boy do I pay the next day!