what is happening to me?

[whatisthispain]

I am new here and i don't really know how to start this post, but anyways...

I've been feeling really down, anxious, and scared recently. Actually, i think i've had this feeling for a pretty long time, so like about the past 2 years, but it's gotten more worse. I've been crying for little things like being excluded from a group, being teased at for saying the wrong answer at class and getting into arguments. I've always felt so happy and then one day i feel just horrible, it's like a pattern, however i eat normally and i dont have sleeping problems. I honestly don't think i have depression or anxiety, but i've always had this pain in me. And i'm scared to say my problems to my friends because they might think i'm trying to do it for attention so that everyone would feel bad for me.... This is just the only website i can talk about this.

I always overthink things, like when someone becomes close to me i sometimes think...

"are they using me to become popular?"

and some other things... and when sometimes i ask them about my thoughts i get into an argument and they get angry at me. This is also the reason why people don't like me alot, and it is also (maybe) the reason i've been getting distant to my friends.

[Zeal]

Hi, and welcome to the forum! 🙂

I'm sorry to hear you've been feeling so down and anxious recently, and have noticed this happening at times for a few years now. Seeing your school counsellor is a great option. Try talking to your parents too (or even just your Mum) about how you feel. Seeing a counsellor outside of school is another option. You don't need to have a diagnosed mental illness to see a counsellor - they can help with stress, general life worries and relationship/friendship difficulties.

I hope talking to your parent and a counsellor is helpful 🙂

Please feel very welcome to post back here.

Best wishes,

SM

[whatisthispain]

Thanks for the advice! 🙂

[white knight]

Hi, welcome

You've just had some good advice.

You could read many of the threads here on low self esteem, one of which I just posted.

Every night before sleep read a thread.

Cheers tony WK

[Just Sara]

Hi whatisthispain;

Welcome to BB forum! You've come to the right place for support and advice.

I don't want to lecture or tell you what to do. I would like to share my own experiences with you to prove what you're going through is a normal part of teen growth and development.

I'm a mature person with the advantage of 'hindsight', and remember my school years as confusing and ridden with "...am I good enough?" Most of my time was focused on 'fitting in' and having time away from my family to be me.

Your post is honest and open and this in itself tells me your courage to speak to us is one of your best qualities. You haven't said how old you are or what gender, or if your studies are being affected.

I didn't have anyone to talk with about my problems and just survived my school years. But looking back, I realise it was focusing on everyone else that was the big issue that confused me most of all. Our teens are a time of transition from childhood to getting into the community as productive members of society, and creating an identity that suits what and who we want to be.

By constantly worrying about what others thought, my mind was always 'out there' instead of concentrating on being 'me'. It took me decades to find this out and I'm paying the price for neglecting the one person that's been a constant throughout my life...me.

The regrets of not putting enough time into study and my identity as a young teen/woman, doesn't really matter anymore, but it did for many years after leaving school. Your friends and other kids are probably feeling the same as you and don't have the courage to speak up either, just as my friends and I talk about now.

Ask the adults in your life about their school days and you'll be surprised at the answers. We all go through it! "If you had your time over, what would you do differently?"

The best advice I can give, is to learn about boundaries, positive communication and living your life for you and your future. Plan, create and have fun. Play sport or join groups with interests similar to your own, even if your friends don't agree. Find out what you're good at and improve on that. It's a great time to experiment!

I wish you well and know your courage gives an advantage going into your adulthood.

Kind thoughts...Dizzy x