Struggling with anxiety & need help.

[Felidae]

Hi there. hope its okay that here is my first post on here. I just wanted to ask for some advice from well anyone.

I dont really know where to begin. Im currently studying at uni and this last second half of the semester has been a bit of a disaster. There is absolutely 0 way I haven't failed this semester at this point and I haven't been for pretty much all of it. I started the year pretty positively I guess new environment, nobody I knew from high school, new everything. First semester went okay and I kinda hoped things were finally good. The second half of this year not so much. And then more recently the past couple of months I'm back to basically how things were in high school. Im struggling to sleep (I haven't slept before 5am the past 2 weeks) and having a lot of trouble with panic attacks and basically just feeling like it's all over I ruined my new chance at trying to fix things. Another thing family hasnt been to happy with me because I honestly struggle to deal with I guess being an adult well basically just coping in the real world. I don't know why I just kinda cave with unfamiliar situations for example I locked myself out by mistake and I sat on the back porch and cried and had multiple panic attacks for the hours it took for someone to get home. Kinda makes me feel very pathetic now but at the time I was terrified something horrible was going to happen like someone was going to come into the backyard and see me there and hurt me. I kinda haven't been to get "help" in years. I don't really know how and I don't really know what to say and I don't go to a GP well for any reason really because It really terrifies me. The last time I got help I went to a few sessions with a psych & counsellor and eventually got an anxiety diagnosis when I was 14 and family saw that as a reason to stop taking me to these "pointless" sessions so I kinda swept it all under a rug since. I know I'm an adult now and nothing should be stopping me but Im not Im not even okay going to buy things I need and Im failing university because Im too scared to face my lectures and say I didn't hand that in because I had a meltdown for the past week so I dont go. The past week has been particularly bad and my friend has noticed I'm not doing so good and is worried. They suggested I go to a GP but I really really dread going. I don't know. They are going through enough as well and I don't want to put more on their plate.

If you have any suggestions please let me know.

[blondguy]

Hello Felidae

Welcome to the forums and good on you for being so strong to post too...Nice1

I have had anxiety attacks for a while when I was in my late teens as well and they are awful...and very scary. I guess I understand where you are coming from...no worries there.

This is a very difficult period to be going through being in Uni as well as all the other issues that come along with it....family....high expectations....the list is endless

Can I ask you why you found the counseling sessions pointless? The forums are a judgemental free zone....you will never be judged here.

Your health and well being is paramount......everything else comes afterwards...

Your GP has heaps of knowledge about anxiety compared to when I started to see my doc a long time ago...You are actually very fortunate (with respect for the anguish you are going through) to have a chance to see your GP

When you see your GP I hope you can remember that they have strict privacy guidelines they have to follow. They also see many people of all ages every day that suffer from the anxiety and 'racing mind' too...

If I can say that you are an amazing proactive person by reaching out on the forums..

Im sorry that I am not a young person but I couldnt ignore your post.

You have everything to gain and nothing to lose by making that appointment with your GP...today...please..

Just a tip if thats okay....make a double appointment so you can start to heal more effectively 🙂

There are many gentle young people that can be here for you Felidae....This thread is yours and I really hope you feel comfortable posting back as many times as you wish

If you have any questions please feel free to ask...

My kind thoughts for you

Paul

[Felidae]

Hi Paul! Thank you very very much for responding to my thread it means a lot to me and the kind welcome as well!

I will try book an appointment today and talk myself into going. Thank you for your support and Im very glad and thankful that mental health is much more known these days we are very lucky now to have so much support through the internet and it being more widely known! I cannot imagine trying to get help when it wasn't as known. I am very sorry to hear that it may not have been very good for you and I hope things have been better for you in recent times. And I'm also very sorry to hear that you have also experienced similar things. I do wish the best for you.

For me I found them helpful at first but the problem ended up being was I ended up getting help because I ended up in hospital (only 1 day) due to it getting way too much and that's how I ended up seeing someone to get help. However that was a burden apparently and every time I went to a session I came home to being yelled at and told I was wasting everyone's time and I eventually kinda sank into a shell and sort of just started saying what I felt would get me out of there quicker and eventually stopped going because my family stopped taking me (I couldn't have found my own way there at that time). One of my parent's ex partner was pretty much convinced it was all because I was out to get them. In the long run the school found out about some stuff going on at home because my best friend at the time told them and they got involved (I'd honestly like to avoid sharing details about that too much on a public internet space) They no longer live here and haven't for a long time now and things aren't the way they were but I never did end up dealing with any of that and tried to do it all on my own which by that I mean shove it all in the corner and pretend it's not there and tell everyone involved that everything was fine after that. I didn't really lie at the appointments but I wasn't exactly making it easy to help myself and get help from them either because I really just wanted to be out of there and didn't want deal with it anymore.

Thank you very much for helping me please don't apologise. I will book an appointment as close as I can to home today.