So tired, all the time

[Fennec]

It's just a little past midnight at the time of writing this.

My depression is reaching an all time high and I feel so hopeless that I just.. don't know what I can do anymore. I've been looking for a job for 2 years, ever since the end of 2019, and I've gotten maybe 10 interviews since - no matter who I go to for help, professionals or otherwise, their advice never works.

I've taken courses that were supposed to help, but EVERYONE these days has the same skills, and I hate this waiting game where sometimes I don't even get a response unless it's an email 2 months later saying the position was filled. I apply for what feels like 1000s of jobs a week (probably more in the 50s), and the rare responses I do get that are even remotely positive always fall through.

I get such horrible anxiety talking on the phone or being on zoom, and I can't tell anybody about it because it's always met with "EVERYONE HAS ANXIETY", or "Everyone suffers like you! suck it up!" I'm so tired. So tired of looking for work and begging for scraps that I don't even get. My anxiety ties me down, my depression drags me under, and I don't know what to do anymore. The only times I feel calm are when I'm out on a walk, or alone in my room. I'm exhausted by people being around me, exhausted from the anxiety I constantly have when they're around.

How do I stop feeling like this? And be more... more. Successful, less anxious? I don't know what I'm looking for, but if y'all have advice, please. Please let me hear it. (Or read it, I spose)

Thank you.

[Sophie_M]

Hi Fennec,
Please know that you've come to a safe, non-judgemental space to talk things through, and our community is here to offer as much support, advice and conversation as you need as we know it hard going through this alone.
If you would like some help finding mental health support, we would recommend that you get in contact with the Beyond Blue Support Service. They are available 24/7 by phone on 1300 22 4636 or on Webchat 1pm-12am AEST on our website: www.beyondblue.org.au/getsupport  One of our friendly counsellors will be able to talk through these feelings with you and can offer support, advice and referrals.
If you’d like there is always support which may be helpful and your always welcome to get in touch with Kids Helpline  They are a confidential and anonymous, telephone and online counselling service specifically for young people aged 25 and under. In addition there is Headspace. Headspace is an organisation specifically for young people aged 12-25 and they offer a wide range of services including group programs which are a great opportunity to meet people. They also have a group chat on their webpage.
Modsupport
 

[geoff]

Hello Fennec, it must be an awful situation you're in and do feel very sorry for you.

When people say 'everybody has anxiety' or 'Everyone suffers like you', maybe or maybe not, but we all have our own type of situations that differ from one person to another.

The person next to you could be struggling with a problem but in comparison, it's nothing like what you're having trouble with, and the two can't be compared, so just say to them, 'why do people grow faster than someone else' and you can't compare anxiety from one person to another.

Have you thought about applying for a position in a job that you had not considered before, simply because the jobs you apply for may have already been taken, the employer has to just go through the process of placing the ad in the paper and go through the procedure and from my knowledge, this will happen many times, unbeknown to the applicants.

There are jobs that are published or only happen by word and mouth that very few people apply for, and it may mean working by yourself but with a company.

Best wishes.

Geoff.

[smallwolf]

hello and welcome.

on the "everybody has anxiety" type statements ... I have met that sort of response as well, and I know that is very unhelpful and awful, Someone asked me once "why do you worry so much!"

do you want to tell me what the courses were that you did? Or perhaps the type of jobs you were applying for? Maybe Geoff and I could act as a sounding board in this area.

What are you passionate about? Is there an overlap between that and the courses you did?

lastly... And Sophie_M mentioned Kids Helpline, but do you have any apps on your phone (?) to help you manage your anxiety? Something that can help you get back to the present moment, instead of thinking about the past of the future.

I am listening if you want to chat some more.

[Petal22]

Hi Fennec,

Wellcome to our forums!

Sorry you are feeling this way…

Can I ask what type of jobs you are applying for? Maybe you haven’t got a job yet is because there’s a better one waiting for you…..

When people say to you it’s only anxiety they obviously don’t understand how you feel…. People feel anxiety in different ways some feel it in severe levels…..

You say you feel calm when you go on walks…. That’s great going on walks is very grounding I enjoy walking too……… maybe you could look for a job that’s outside work? I understand you feeling tired anxiety is exhausting….. but please keep looking for work the right job will come up……. What’s meant for you will always find it’s way…..

I understand being around certain people is draining…….. try to be around people who lift you up and not pull you down…..

If you are feeling really exhausted or distressed please see your gp you could do a mental health plan together this will enable you to see a psychologist.

Im here to chat

[Fennec]

I've applied for every job under the sun that I could possibly think of.

Being around all people is draining and exhausting, even the good ones, though I enjoy their company.

I don't have a GP / family docotr / and my mother doesn't believe I could possibly be depressed or anxious.

[Fennec]

Thank you for your reply!

I did a hospitality course so I could gain skills in that area that I hadn't really ever considered, and I've done work placements and work experience things in retail and warehousing, as well as animal care (doggy daycare/groomers). I've been applying to all sorts of jobs that I can do, even ones that I probably can't just to see if I'd make it into the second round (I did, on a few, but never past that)

I like to write and create characters, so there's no overlap at all between the course I did and what I'm passionate about, even more so because I don't like being around people.

I have one app on my phone that I use when I feel like having a meltdown, if that counts!

[Fennec]

Thank you for your reply, Geoff!

>Have you thought about applying for a position in a job that you had not considered before, simply because the jobs you apply for may have already been taken, the employer has to just go through the process of placing the ad in the paper and go through the procedure and from my knowledge, this will happen many times, unbeknown to the applicants.

I have, and I've done it a few times. I've gone to in person places and dropped off a resume (before the global panini got really bad), but I only got 2 replies out of however many I expected.

It's really hard. I'm not sure what to do anymore

[Petal22]

Hi Fennec,

How would you feel about seeing a gp yourself and discussing how you are feeling?

im sorry your mum doesn’t acknowledge how you feel…

Please keep chatting to the good people in your life….

Keep applying for jobs one will come up and be for you 😊

[quirkywords]

Fennec I feel tired a lot and relate to your posts. The only job I have really liked was running my own business. I know that is not possible for everyone .
Take care