Young people

Psychologist is not helpful?

replies: 10

Hi, this is my first post so sorry if it seems a bit all over the place. I'm currently in my early 20s and have struggled with my mental health for years and years. Mental illness seems to run in the family (multiple members with schizophrenia and bi... View more

Hi, this is my first post so sorry if it seems a bit all over the place. I'm currently in my early 20s and have struggled with my mental health for years and years. Mental illness seems to run in the family (multiple members with schizophrenia and bipolar). Only recently (past 2 months) did i start seeing a psychologist because it always seemed like too much effort to organise it. I got a mental health care plan from my GP and I didn't get to choose my psychologist. I feel like I go through pretty long periods of time where I either feel nothing or only negative emotions (agitated, anger, hostile). The only thing i tend to care about is doing well at uni. I have always struggled making friends and have had very few close ones. However the ones i do have, i also feel absolutely nothing towards in these periods. I feel as though i could completely cut them out of my life without any second thought. I even feel like I could be fired from my job and not care whatsoever. I haven't found joy in doing almost anything for years and lack any sexual desire. Going out to with friends feels like a chore. I don't even enjoy eating and only do so because there's bad health implications of lack of food and also because i feel physically sick if i don't. For background, i had an emotionally abusive/neglectful up bringing but no longer live with my parents. Other things i experience include finding it extremely hard to sleep and when i do, i can sleep for 12 hours every night and still be exhausted, and some days i find it almost impossible to concentrate. I also get agitated very easily if the area i live in is not kept clean. I'm quite an analytical person so i can understand how I'm feeling without talking to others. To me it sounds like i may have symptoms of depression/anxiety/bipolar. I've voiced everything i feel to my psychologist and I've found him no help and i often leave more agitated then when i came. To me, my symptoms clearly show signs of potential mental illness yet my psychologist has never addressed them and of course i don't want to wrongly self diagnose. He's said i feel the way i do because of how i grew up, which i'm fully aware of and not why i'm going to him. I'm going to him so he can clarify/diagnose in order for me to understand what's going on and to fix it. He doesn't suggest ways to cope with what i feel. I find it quite annoying that after putting off going to see someone for so long that it hasn't helped whatsoever. What do i do?

I can't tell if I'm actually trying or putting any effort into making positive changes in my life...

replies: 3

So, I've been struggling. I keep losing and failing, and I'm tired. But I also want to do better and change. It's hard and I can't tell if I'm actually trying or putting any effort into changing or doing something different because my times where I t... View more

So, I've been struggling. I keep losing and failing, and I'm tired. But I also want to do better and change. It's hard and I can't tell if I'm actually trying or putting any effort into changing or doing something different because my times where I trial something different don't last long. Then looking back into it, I'm not even sure if I tried at all. I just feel so defeated or like I've given up a decent portion of the time, and tired so often.

I’m falling apart

replies: 11

I’ve been so stressed and worried lately, i feel like I’m at the bottom of a dark pit all on my own. School work is piling up and I cant find the motivation to do it in any way, my friends are so distant and i can’t escape from the people I said I wo... View more

I’ve been so stressed and worried lately, i feel like I’m at the bottom of a dark pit all on my own. School work is piling up and I cant find the motivation to do it in any way, my friends are so distant and i can’t escape from the people I said I would help. I can’t trust anyone with anything anymore. I don’t know who I am. I look at my name and I feel worse. I don’t want to wake up tomorrow, I’m just dragged along everyday but I don’t want to anymore. I feel like I’m sitting on a tightrope. I’ve talked to people but no one has been able to help. I’m trying one more thing before losing my strength, I have no more energy left to try and be keep going. I just want this to stop.

Struggling with life and goals

replies: 4

For the longest time I've wanted to be a singer but I'm a quitter. I honestly feel horrible because I can't even bring myself to try and I'm so pathetic that seeing things like Kpop performances makes me want to cry. I just feel so down and it's hone... View more

For the longest time I've wanted to be a singer but I'm a quitter. I honestly feel horrible because I can't even bring myself to try and I'm so pathetic that seeing things like Kpop performances makes me want to cry. I just feel so down and it's honestly unbearable. Anyone else feel this way? Is it just extreme envy?

The "Too late" girl

replies: 1

"Nat takes far too long" That was the very words my student report said three years in a row, all written by different teachers. My habit of taking far too long in completing activities was apparent in primary school. I would be so absorbed in the mo... View more

"Nat takes far too long" That was the very words my student report said three years in a row, all written by different teachers. My habit of taking far too long in completing activities was apparent in primary school. I would be so absorbed in the moment I would simply forget about time. My mother was genuinely concerned how these exact words would appear in my report every year, but I simply brushed it off. Fast forward to now at age 24 and completing my last year of studying, I'm really starting to see the problem escalating over the years. I took an interest in graphic design and studied it in TAFE while working. I loved them both, but at the same time I was very scared and conscious of my peers judging my every move. My workflow for both slowed down and soon enough, I was hit yet again with those very words by both my teacher and boss - "you take far too long". I broke down, skipped a lot of classes and ended up paying the hefty price of finishing 8 overdue assignments in a week. After taking a year break, I quit my job and continued my studies in University, hoping I would toughen up with the more academically strict deadlines. The problem in fact reached its peak. Every time I started an assignment, those "too late" words would echo in my head and I would start questioning my every move. "Is this the most efficient way? Am I taking too long? How long should I be taking to finish this? Does other people take this long?". Studying a design course that encourages experimentation meant there was no definite rules to anything. I left my assignments to the last minute a lot, not wanting to face my emotions of doubt and fear, and skipped classes too to avoid the critical feedback sessions. I made myself feel worse by handing a lot of overdue assignments, creating an endless cycle of guilt and disappointment. Now I'm in my last year and I am still struggling with my subjects, finishing an overdue assignment while trying to survive my internship. I really do enjoy my studies and would love to make it as my dream job, but seeing how slow and sensitive I am, I'm questioning if I am suited for this creative field. I want to change. I don't want to be the "too late" girl anymore. I've attempted multiple times to manage my time effectively, but I keep failing from feeling overwhelmed by negative emotions. Someone please advise me how to get out of this vicious cycle. Anything on time management, dealing with fears of peers, failure, doubt and judgement.

Lost my ability to be creative?

replies: 8

So, I've lost the ability to be creative, like in the way I used to when I was a teenager and now, at 23, seemingly lost all of my creativity. Is this just me, or have others experienced this?

Studying struggles

replies: 3

Hi I’m Mina and I just wanted to use this space to rant/vent/express thoughts and get some empathy, support, or advice. My main issue today is that I missed the deadline for a weekly online test that I have for one of my courses. Negative self talk l... View more

Hi I’m Mina and I just wanted to use this space to rant/vent/express thoughts and get some empathy, support, or advice. My main issue today is that I missed the deadline for a weekly online test that I have for one of my courses. Negative self talk like “I’m an idiot, why did I leave it to the last minute?” kinda comes up as I write this now. I studied for 4 hours on this unit but because I’m already behind, I spent most of those hours on a topic that wasn’t related to the quiz. Now there *is* a safety net embedded into the assessment of weekly quizzes, you can safely miss three and still get full marks if you do well on all the others. This was the third one I missed so rationally it shouldn’t be much to worry about. The combined scores only weigh up to 3% of my grade too. But I can’t help but feel disappointed. Like I failed. I was completing it right up until the deadline but unfortunately finished the last question just after the minute the deadline ended. This triggered panic like how am I ever going to catch up. I feel like, despite the fact that I procrastinate as a way to cope with anxiety and overwhelm, when I do study, I study “hard”. I exert so much effort and put so much pressure on myself (not the best thing to do, I know) but will it be enough? Will my effort be worth it? When will I reap the reward? I’ve struggled with starting uni a few times. I’ve deferred those times, after finding it was too much. My goal this semester is to just pass. So again rationally, I shouldn’t be putting this much pressure. But I do. I’m a perfectionist. I also know, it’s not about studying hard, but studying efficiently so how do I get myself out of my current perfectionist studying pattern? Anyway, that’s it for now.

Are you addicted to pot??

replies: 7

Hi people, posting this thread hoping to create an open discussion about smoking pot, the good, the bad and the ugly. Personally, I've been a pot smoker while growing up over the past 7, 8 years. It's been a constant compulsion, it's become part of m... View more

Hi people, posting this thread hoping to create an open discussion about smoking pot, the good, the bad and the ugly. Personally, I've been a pot smoker while growing up over the past 7, 8 years. It's been a constant compulsion, it's become part of my identity and I seek comfort in getting faded. But the biggest determinant of my addiction is the habits that I form. e.g. If I get up and smoke, the same things gonna happen the next day... until all I'm doing is smoking lol When I try to stop, I find that regardless of how determined I am, I'll always make an excuse and pick up the billy again. Then I'm back at it, usually all in... The smart thing to do would be to accept the hiccup and remain determined. It's very possible but drugs don't work that way, pot hijacks the reward system in our brains, meaning when I like something, I'm probably gonna do it again. So it seems like the only way to move forward is to be strong not smoke pot at all. Right? But its not that simple. I've grown up with it and it forms an integral part of so many relationships in my life. This is kind of the identity paradox that I struggle with, that pot is an inescapable part of my life. The silver-lining of this paradox is that I feel as though I know who I am and I can be pragmatic about when I choose to smoke. e.g. I'll only smoke after I've finished work and done everything I had to. This perspective is where I find peace. That's until I get over-worked and I do something stupid. I'd say that the biggest reason I smoke pot is because it detaches me from reality... it's an escape. This brings us to my final paradox, that ignorance is bliss... but it's still ignorance. I think it's easy to forget about the right thing when my mind is clouded. I can be a very impulsive and careless individual when I get too high and my brain doesn't function right. It's not fair to the people around me and it makes me feel like a shell of a man... Then I usually smoke because I'm feeling down. This is my paradox. I chase the blissfulness in the ignorance of my addiction. I know I might be better off if I stop, but I don't believe it. I make excuses, and I justify them because that's how I choose to live. I think no matter what, the most important thing is to stay positive. I hope someone finds this insightful. Does anyone feel the same? Please share :)

just struggling

replies: 6

I can't find the motivation to get any work at school done, I feel like I'm constantly stressed and under pressure to get practice work turned in and submit uni applications. Just everything surrounding school and all the uncertainty with covid with ... View more

I can't find the motivation to get any work at school done, I feel like I'm constantly stressed and under pressure to get practice work turned in and submit uni applications. Just everything surrounding school and all the uncertainty with covid with trials and hsc has started to trigger more anxiety than normal. Especially not being able to see my friends in person has been hard, and zooming with them is not nearly the same. I've been finding it impossible to get work done or just feel genuinely happy most days throughout the week. People ask if I'm okay and I don't want to be a burden on anyone so I usually answer that I'm doing good, but I'm not actually. I am being relied on for my friends, checking up on them and making sure they are okay, but I don't have much being reciprocated. I just honestly don't know what to do, and need someone to talk to and actually be there for me, I just don't really know.

depressed 19 year old virgin

replies: 9

hello to anyone that reads this. I am a 19 year old male who has never had sex, had a girlfriend or even kissed anyone. I feel like a failure as a man. I am very depressed as a result, especially when hearing about other people my age or younger and ... View more

hello to anyone that reads this. I am a 19 year old male who has never had sex, had a girlfriend or even kissed anyone. I feel like a failure as a man. I am very depressed as a result, especially when hearing about other people my age or younger and their sexual experiences. It's like I am a small child still. I had an eating disorder when i was 15 (over it now) which i believe is one of the key reasons as to why i am in this situation now. I regret that period of my life everyday. Now lockdown is really screwing me over because I can't go out and meet people. I have started seeing a therapist but that isn't really helping because i can't go back in time prevent myself from getting to this point. I really hate life and i don't know what to do.

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Psychologist is not helpful?

replies: 10