Sexually nervous

Ellie_B · ‎10-04-2019

HI. Im only 18 and just started uni, living on campus. I have only ever kissed boys before and there is such a huge expectation at uni and it makes me feel pressured. I am attracted to lots of guys but whenever a guy shows interest i get so nervous and turn them down. I want a boyfriend and to do stuff with guys but don't know why I get so fridget. I am nervous I don't know what I am doing but people say everything gets better with experience. ideas anyone?

smallwolf · ‎10-04-2019

Hi Ellie,

welcome to beyond blue.

I won't be able to give much advice to you as the last time I was at Uni (similar to you) was many years ago. Too far back to remember. But I do know that it is a big step to start Uni, especially if you are living on campus. What are you studying?

My only suggestion is to try to be yourself, and not to give in to expectations. You could always chat to a counsellor in student services section who might be able to help you out?

There are relaxation exercises you could try, but I would only be guessing from your post. But why you get nervous or get "so fridget" is something that you might be able to get to the bottom of by chatting to a counsellor in student services section (who might be able to help you out)?

I hope you come back and talk some more about your situation.

peace,

Tim

Nothappyuni · ‎11-04-2019

Hi Ellie B,

I am at uni right now; however, I am a mature age student seeking to improve myself.

I think social media puts unrealistic pressure on young men and women. Be thin, be fit, be a star, be rich, have a boyfriend/girlfriend...

My advice, be yourself.

Break the mould and be something different. Why do you have to have a boyfriend?

All good things come to those who wait.

Enjoy life. I love the Rain Forrest in the area I live. So I go for walks and take photos of waterfalls and landscapes, of rivers and trees.

Find friends that like the same things you like, you never know what might happen.

Be vigilant as well. Not everyone is who they seem, I have had my heart broken many times by people that were not who they pretended to be. It shames me to say it; but, never put yourself in a compromising position. Anything that happens should always be on your terms, when you are good and ready.

Enjoy uni, though there will be times when you hate it (I know I do).