Lost

[mollycc12]

I feel so lost and alone. I just don't know what the way forward is anymore. My beautiful boyfriend is the most amazing man in the world but my insecurities and constant mind racing is making me lash out at him. He doesn't deserve it. I love him more than anything, and I don't want to loose him but all the conflict is taking its toll. Everyday just seems like a battle and I just don't know what the answer or way forward is anymore. I have a therapist I see and I'm on medication but it seems recently that everything has just fallen into a heap and I don't know how to find my way out. I just feel so lost, confused and alone.

[smallwolf]

Hi mollycc12,

Welcome to beyond blue.

Firstly I want you to know that I am listening. Secondly, that you are already seeing a therapist should be seen as good news as it sounds like you want to the address this problem which is a good start.

It sounds like you are overwhelmed by the rollercoaster ride of emotions that you go through each day with your boyfriend. Trying to stop the thoughts you are having might take time. It would be nice to be able to just turn them off. But we cannot.

Does your boyfriend know you are seeing a therapist? Have you been able to explain to your boyfriend about how you are feeling?

I am not sure what your therapist has suggested... and my mind generally races about different things. It feels like there are 10000 things going on, when in reality there are only about 3-5 things, but those things you see from different perspectives and you cannot get rid of them. But if I can write them down, or say "thank you" to my mind it helps to stop those thoughts.

And perhaps, and this is a trick that I do, when I talk to my wife, I will say something like "I feel that, and this is my mind, ...", so that she know that it is my anxiety talking and helps to defuse any tension in a conversation. Things can work out for you, but we each have to work out what works for us. If you want to chat some more....

Peace,

Tim

[youcantknow]

I feel your pain! i was taking my anger out on my boyfriend some of the time. He just didn't really understand mental health at all! i loved him so so much he meant the world to me! but near the end of our relationship, he was just so happy all the time and he loved me so much and i couldn't cope with all the positivity, in general, let alone all the positivity towards me! i always say sorry and struggled to accept compliments from him and that drove him mad! I ended up cheating and messing it all up, i miss him so much our hugs that made me feel so much better he didn't even realise but he was the reason my mental health got better the reason i got out of bed most days! i am so lost at the moment I'm back in the hole and i done know how to get out! I just wanna be happy!!!!