I was in two relationships. Now, I’m scared.

[PurpleStars]

I messed up.

I was in two relationships until October or November. One was real, one was fake. The fake was with a 21 years old, 5 years old than me. I told him about my actual REAL boyfriend, how we were in a relationship BEFORE HIM AND I a while ago, I’m not sure when but I have. He hates my boyfriend.

Just note that this fake relationship, this person doesn’t know it was fake. You might be asking, how was it fake? I never loved him, why would I? I built up a ‘relationship’ with him because he literally said it wouldn’t make him depressed if we weren’t together. I’m a nice person, I didn’t want him to be depressed. I put everyone else before myself. I didn’t look into the future, what would this do? It’s caused me depression and anxiety, PTSD and a lot of paranoia, I’m becoming anorexic too. Looks like I’ve been wrapped into this dark trap. I broke it off, like I said, now everyday I am scared, anxious and worried sick that he will hurt me because I made us break up. I’m so scared he will break me and my REAL boyfriend up. He’s very mean and vulgar now. Saying stuff like “I wonder what you’d feel like with your heart broken”, meaning that he wonders what would happen if my boyfriend and I broke up. I shouldn’t have even spoken to this man. I hate him. He’s scary. I regret even replying to his message. I don’t know what to do, who to talk to, nothing. I am clueless.

I’ve told my amazing REAL boyfriend about this fake relationship, he forgave me. I am so thankful for this angel. He just said as long as you didn’t send nudes. I told him of course not, as my stomach would sink.

I did, it’s child porn. I felt like I was forced to do so, he also sent videos of him. I am worried this MAN will use it against me, towards my boyfriend but I think he’s deleted them.. I hope.

”Why don’t you block him!?”. I’m scared he will attack me, hurt me.

He lives on the other side of the country. He knows my address.

I am so scared. I am so sorry I have made this stupid, pathetic mistake.

I need help, advice. Anything. Please help me..

[PurpleStars]

Hello Mary.

He doesn’t know my boyfriends email or number. He does know his social media’s. I sadly had to invade my boyfriends privacy and go into his accounts, blocking this creep on all of his accounts. But I’m very worried that he can just make another account and attack us. I can ask him kindly to delete his accounts or disable them like I said in my reply to Geoff.

My parents are coming on the cruise with my, I’m only 16, they wouldn’t let me go out of the country for 2 weeks without them. My boyfriend isn’t going, we did invite him though. He is going to Japan on the 20th and my cruise is tomorrow, the 14th.

I really.. REALLY dont want to tell them before the cruise.. I beg you.

I am certain about his address. We sent each other gifts. Also on Snapchat (a social media platform) it shows your location, and he’s in Perth. I’m in NSW.

I am so sorry that I am worrying you.

Thank you..

[PurpleStars]

I want to add on that I forced us to stop doing sexual things back in October.

He said, Why!? We are just helping each other feel pleasure!

Yeah okay. You feel pleasure from a minor. I’m sorry if this is too explicit and it needs to be changed but I felt like it was a very important key and that I should’ve mentioned it earlier.

Another thing, he is saying thanks to our break up, he’s back to being depressed and suicidal. He has a private Twitter and he sometimes tweets stuff like, “I love the feeling of replacement!”, “D e p r e s s e d.” and this tweet made my heart sink, he is talking about breaking my boyfriend and I up: “Oh how I could pull everything apart.”

I am so scared. I want to tell my parents. I am so worried and frightened for their response.. I’m very scared that they will force me and my real boyfriend to break up because of my actions and that’s my worst nightmare..

i sound so selfish.. im so sorry im so sorry

I am so sorry. I know I keep saying this everytime, but I am truely sorry.

[PurpleStars]

Mary im so sorry I can’t i can’t do this I feel so weak I don’t knkw what to do anymore I’m sobbing in my room all alone I NEED TO TELL SOMEONE. ANYONE. MY PARENTS!

im so weak I can’t I can’t I’m so hopeless. This is all my fault it’s all mine. It’s my fault. I’m sorry I even made a forum I’m just wasting peoples time I’m so sorry im so weak and pathetic..

[IreneM]

HI PurpleStars

I have to agree with Geoff and Mary. It sounds like you are doing all of the right things.

My recommendation is that you and your boyfriend change your email addresses and phone numbers. Be open and honest with each other. Where possible and I also recommend that you consider changing address to move from where you are and moving into somewhere more secure.

If he shows any signs of attacking in any way. Then do all of what the others have said and tell everyone that you need to, esp. the police. I also recommend that, after your cruise if you still have issues, you seek psychological help also.

Stay tuned to this forum, for us all to support you.

Irene.

[PurpleStars]

I am so conflicted on when to tell my parents.

I NEED and WANT to do it today once my dad gets home from work.

But at the same time, I can't. I wouldn't be able to move or probably speak. I'd just sob and they'd be confused. I don't want to do it before the holiday. I don't want to ruin this. I don't know what to say and if I were to tell the police what would I even say..

I am so sorry..

[PurpleStars]

The creep keeps messaging me, he writes stuff, trying to make me feel guilt for what I've done.

He says stuff along the lines of, "If only you knew how it felt so be replaced." and stuff like that.

I want to tell my parents. I'm so scared..

[White_Rose]

Dear Purple Stars

Please block all access to your email and phone immediately. Doesn't matter if he has any social media because he cannot contact you once he is blocked.

He is trying emotional blackmail on you to make you feel bad and do what he wants. Stop responding to him and tell your parents. What do you mean by I forced us to stop doing sexual things back in October? Apart from talking about sex what can you do when you live so far apart.

You are saying you want to tell someone. Will you consider phoning the beyond blue help line. 1300 22 4636 available 24/7. Remember you can print out your post or perhaps the first few posts and give it to your parents to read. Take a deep breath and just do it.

Mary

[geoff]

Hello PurpleStar, please block him from any way he can contact you, if you need to change your sim card then he will have no idea of how to contact you.

The more you allow him to, the more anxious you are going to be and the more he is going to mention how depressed he is feeling, etc, you don't want to listen to any of that, he is only doing it to make you feel guilty, he's doing this on purpose and could be trying to manipulate how you feel, this needs to stop.

Write something done on a piece of paper then hand it over to your parents, I think you need to get this off your chest before the cruise, otherwise, it's something that's only going to worry you.

Take care.

Geoff.

[PurpleStars]

Hello Geoff, hello everybody.

It’s currently 4:38am as I’m writing this and I woke up around 4:07am for no apparent reason.

I got the sudden urge to just block and remove him on everything, so I did. Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, Phone Number, Twitter and other things. Gone. Completely gone. I’ve also changed settings on certain social media’s where I can only get messages from my friends or no one. So he won’t be contacting me anymore.

It’s been 15? 20? minutes and I feel so much better. I feel like I’ll finally be able to heal.

I’m still going to tell my parents and the police. Just not today, after my cruise. I can promise you all that.

I want to thank all of you for helping me build up the courage to remove him from my life. He has slowly ruined it for me. For 2 whole years I let him play with my brain.

I will be okay. I will heal from this and be so happy.

Thank you all again. You have all made me so happy.

[geoff]

Hi PurpleStar, sorry I forgot to say that I have been caught in the same trap before, maybe a year or so when I had someone email me 3 or 4 times every day, she was an alcoholic who had stopped and convinced her to do several good things.

She sent me emails and said she loved me and if I didn't return the favour she would keep asking me if 'I loved her' time and time again, and if I didn't say I did, then she would make other comments until I said it, I'm sorry I did, I was caught.

It didn't favour me at all, so please don't let it string along.

Best wishes.

Geoff.